Rob Roy: A Product of Our Environment, Making Warriors, & Seizing Life Changing Moments with a Navy Seal

SHOW NOTES: 

• Website(s): https://trident-cc.com/
• Email: robert.roy@trident-cc.com
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/robertroy3/
• FrankSpeech URL: https://frankspeech.com/v/3kp42

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CORE THEMES, KEYWORDS, & MENTIONS:

• Mississippi, segregation, cotton growers, cotton plantation, sharecropping, KKK, trauma, violence, norms, worldview, life lessons, forks in the road, ghetto, living in the ghetto, success, magnet school, choices, emotional responses, sexual assault on a child, pedophile, porn addiction, blacking out memories, Navy Seal, situational awareness, culture, hard work, discipline, quality of work, what a dad is, dad, KOSS speakers, the “ghetto claw”, compensation, compensating for others, being the best you can be, benefiting comic books, warrior, natural leader, fire on ship, DEI, Clark Cummings, mentor,  SEAL Team 6, Sony PlayStation, Navy commercials, Trident Coaching Consulting, counseling, psychology, USS Nimitz, PTSD, PlayStation SOCOM

For more Remarkable Episodes, Inspiration, and Motivation, please visit https://davidpasqualone.com/remarkable-people-podcast/. Enjoy!

Transcript

Rob Roy: A Product of Our Environment, The Making of a Warrior, & Seizing Life Changing Moments with a Navy Seal

Welcome to the Remarkable People Podcast!: Warning. The interview you're about to experience has already positively changed people's lives. If applied appropriately, it can change yours, too. The views expressed are those of the guest and host. The content of this podcast is not meant to be legal, financial, or medical advice. Warning. This episode may contain graphic details of the guest's life.

[00:00:18] Welcome to the Remarkable People Podcast!: Listener discretion is advised.

[00:00:21] David Pasqualone: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to this powerful episode of the Remarkable People Podcast, The Rob Roy Story. You need to listen to the whole thing. You will find value, you will find inspiration, and you will find power in it. This episode was hard for me to actually create this intro you're listening to now because there's so much in it.

[00:00:45] David Pasqualone: Rob talks about things that he's never talked about publicly before. This is a man who has not only succeeded in many areas of life. He is a lion. He is a wolf. He is a SEAL. A U. S. Navy SEAL. 25 years. Sony PlayStation. If you're familiar with the SOCOM games. One, two, three, four. He's on the cover of them all.

[00:01:11] David Pasqualone: He has been in U. S. Navy Special Forces commercials. He's been in Hollywood movies, but this story is of his life. And you and I, sadly, have experienced many of the same things Rob experienced. He's gone through everything from bigotry to being molested as a child. He was told in his fifth grade class that nobody in this class is going to amount to anything and the list goes on and on and on.

[00:01:41] David Pasqualone: I've actually struggled to make this intro because I don't feel like I can do the episode justice. So you're just going to have to trust me and listen to the whole thing. It's one of our longer episodes, but it's packed with inspiration and truth. As the episode goes on, just like any conversation, you get to know one another, you become more comfortable with another, you become more transparent and real with one another.

[00:02:08] David Pasqualone: Rob goes deep into his personal life, which he's never done before. He'll tell you that he's going to talk about issues he's never talked about publicly, any form, in his books, in his interviews, In his just coaching, this is a first. So we don't want you to listen to this episode because we want to be famous.

[00:02:28] David Pasqualone: We want you to listen to this episode because Rob's heart and my heart is to help you grow. This episode has helped me grow as a man. It will help you grow as a human. Listen to it, take notes, reach out to Rob if you have any questions and just know. that there is practical value and truth that we've all struggled with.

[00:02:52] David Pasqualone: I don't think there's a human on this planet that won't connect with at least parts of this episode if not the whole thing and at the end of it you're going to be not just More informed, but you're going to be inspired to act and that's what we all need to do. Like our slogan says, don't just listen to great content, but do it.

[00:03:11] David Pasqualone: Repeat the good each day so you can have a great life in this world, but more importantly, an eternity to come. So at this time, get ready to hear Rob Roy's story and let us know what you think at the end. Reach out to Rob again, if we can help you in any way as a Remarkable People Podcast in our community, let us know.

[00:03:32] David Pasqualone: But you will not be disappointed if you stick through the entire episode, I promise. So at this time, our friend and American hero, Rob Roy.

[00:03:43] David Pasqualone: Hey Rob, how are you today, brother? 

[00:03:46] Rob Roy: I'm doing good, man. I'm doing real good. 

[00:03:49] David Pasqualone: Well, I am excited to have you here. Our listeners heard just a small portion of your story, and there's a lot to go through. We're excited to be here together, but if someone's deciding if they want to listen to your episode, what do you guarantee that they're going to get if they listen start to finish to this episode that they can apply to their lives?

[00:04:10] Rob Roy: Well, normally I would say, because of my ego, I'd say they'll learn a lot about me, but I think they will learn a lot about themselves. My story is not unique to anybody else, but the way I tell it and the way you're going to ask me questions, and I'm so open about what, you know, what I've gone through, I'm sure that anybody who's listening to the podcast, male or female, will get a lot from it and say, you know, I was like that, or I remember that, or that happened to me, or I can't believe that happened in your struggles.

[00:04:35] Rob Roy: So, I'm looking forward to sharing that with you, and sharing it with your audience. 

[00:04:39] David Pasqualone: Yeah, man. Yes. So let's do this, Rob. We don't want to dwell on the past, but we want to learn from it. And everything that happened, good, bad, ugly, pretty, pretty ugly. Everything that's happened to us makes us the men and women we are today.

[00:04:54] David Pasqualone: We're a man, but for our listeners, the women, right? So where'd you start? What was your origin [00:05:00] like? What was your family like? Where were you born geographically? Just start off in your story.

[00:05:08] Rob Roy: Man, that's a lot. That is a lot. So I have to go way, way back, start the clock. I am I'm a product of my environment, which is to say that I was born in Mississippi, and then my parents moved they were together. They moved from Mississippi to Chicago, Chicago to Milwaukee, and I was raised, you know, as a young adult, not a young adult, but as a child in Milwaukee until my adulthood, until when I left.

[00:05:27] Rob Roy: And that's a story in itself when why we left Mississippi and how we ended up in Chicago and and how I was raised in Milwaukee, if you want to hear it. 

[00:05:35] David Pasqualone: Yeah, absolutely. Like I said, our listeners are from all over the world, different cultures, different geographic locations, but we all have humanity.

[00:05:45] David Pasqualone: And so everything that's happened to you, like I said, good or bad, it makes you who you are. It's part of your story. What was up, what was being raised like, and what was the home like and how to bring you a new destination? 

[00:05:58] Rob Roy: Yeah, let's kind of start with, and I'm, I want to share this and it's probably the subject matter is kind of foreign to a lot of people because these things have changed over the past, over the last, you know, 60 years and I'm older.

[00:06:09] Rob Roy: When I was raised they were in Mississippi and the township that was from. There were dirt roads the sidewalks are still wooden back then and the bathrooms are outside. This is in the 1960s. And me retelling the story is me being told the story about my brother when I asked him about, you know, why do we leave Mississippi, Bullard, Mississippi, which is For most people that aren't geographically challenged, it's where all the cotton and stuff was grown.

[00:06:37] Rob Roy: It's a specific area where cotton grows really, really good down in Mississippi, just off of the plantation. We were on the plantation, we were just off of it. Well, a lot of black people live off of it. Around the plantations that are down there because of everything that happened in the past, and I'm by no means saying that you know, I harbor any ill will to people like that or, or the people who own those plantation.

[00:07:01] Rob Roy: It's just that's where I came from. So that's my upbringing. So my parents were not very educated. I think my father had a sixth grade education. My mother had a sixth grade education. My father, before I was born, he had my older brother and before I was born had an older brother and I had an older sister who just recently passed.

[00:07:20] Rob Roy: My Father would go to, because jobs are not plentiful in Mississippi, they were plentiful in Chicago. So if you wanted to work, you basically, a lot of people migrated to the north, much as what we see now. Went to Chicago, worked in a meat packing factory up there and wanted to the story I normally tell people is that he, he couldn't really count even though he had a 6th grade education.

[00:07:42] Rob Roy: So he learned how to count, because you got more money if you knew how to count than you had at Chiago. And then while he was up there, he also found out that that's where all the cotton goes. So we grew cotton while they grew cotton and they were getting a certain price for it. The story goes that my dad is that he learned what cotton prices were in Chicago and then came back to Mississippi and went to the owner of the plantation and said, Hey, you're ripping us off.

[00:08:03] Rob Roy: Your prices you're selling it for is more than what you're paying us. And you're only paying us half of it. We're working the land. It's called sharecropping back in the day. And my father was like, You know, you need to give us our fair share. You've been ripping us off for years. The guy, they got into words Colt told my father that uncertain terms that you need to be out of here before sundown.

[00:08:23] Rob Roy: Because, you know, basically what would happen if my father started telling this story to everybody else, it would just upset the norm that's there. My father called a bunch of names, beat the guy up. I know a lot of people would say, well, that's, you know, that's hard to believe. And it's like, well, yeah, but you're talking about a different time and a different, when men were men, when you said something and you meant it, then there was a repercussion behind it.

[00:08:46] Rob Roy: So my father was riding his bike home cause he didn't have a car. Well, he had a car, but he drove his road bike and was run off the road by a bunch of, I wouldn't say they're like Klansmen, but the way the story is told to, to me, I guess more for impact, if they were Klansmen, let's just call them that.

[00:09:01] Rob Roy: Or just say people that were not actually appreciative of my dad pulled him over and said, Hey you're not getting out of town tonight. You're going to die today. And so they pulled the trigger twice. Now the thing about my dad, this has happened twice to him in his entire life, where somebody pulled the trigger and the bullet didn't fire.

[00:09:16] Rob Roy: I shouldn't say the bullet didn't fire, the weapon didn't fire. It In this particular case, the guy pulled the pistol out, put it to his head, said you're gonna die, pull the trigger, nothing happened, pull the trigger again, he goes, you're lucky, be gone by sundown. So we got in the car and we drove to Chicago, and that's where I ended up in Chicago for like three or four weeks.

[00:09:34] Rob Roy: Or months, I don't know. I was really small. And then I moved to Milwaukee and that's where my kind of journey begins, where my memory kicks in about who I was and what I did and how I got to where I am today, which is a unique, not a, not a defining, like, you know, there was something that happened in my life specifically that got me to do all the things that I did, but that I had a consistent upbringing and the same Neighborhoods, [00:10:00] if you will.

[00:10:01] Rob Roy: You can imagine my mother and father didn't stay together after that. She got up they got to Milwaukee, probably three years old. And my father was accused of child abuse back then, because I pulled something off the stove. And in these, these memories that I have now kind of frame of who I am about, you know, how I treat children and how my kids need to stay in one place, because these were all the things that happened to me that, yeah, they helped me.

[00:10:27] Rob Roy: Build out my character. And if you talk about character of an individual, that's the trials and tribulations they go through, right? That's that making of a warrior is that you, the, the more experience you have with, with adversity and, and and I'm not saying people have to be abused, but the more tr the more trauma that you have.

[00:10:45] Rob Roy: And the more you, the more you come out of it, the more you can do. Like if you're talking about raising a wolf or you're raising a lion, not to use these kind of animals as creatures that can to, to marry up what a person is. But these are kind of the images that would come out when you're talking about, how do I raise a person?

[00:11:02] Rob Roy: Am I raising a wolf? Or am I raising the sheep? And sheep are protected. Sheep are, they're moved together, fed, and they provide a service. And most people treat their kids like they're sheep. They're the shepherds, and then their kids are the sheep. And they don't have any experience, and they don't know what to do when a wolf comes along.

[00:11:20] Rob Roy: I was raised as a wolf. I was raised as a lion. And what I mean by that is the neighborhoods I grew up in hardened me to understand that I can, I can do a lot if I did it. If there was nothing available for me, I need to make things happen. And what I mean by that is. If there wasn't a job available, I had to find a job that was available to me that I could take, that I could do, and I could do well, and make money doing that.

[00:11:42] Rob Roy: And it's not just about money, it's about who you are as an individual, and what you try to aspire to be in the future. I never saw myself becoming a Navy SEAL, owning my own business, being on television, and being a marketing campaign for Sony PlayStation, and all the other things I've done in my entire life.

[00:11:56] Rob Roy: But I would tell people it started when we moved from Chicago to Milwaukee. And into the neighborhoods and then being moved around and going to different schools and all that, all that trauma that happens along with it. The one thing I would say from say an early age, I watched a kid in third grade hit another kid in the head with a chair.

[00:12:18] Rob Roy: This is a school called Pomeritz in Milwaukee. And it resonates in my mind that people can do the most disaster, not disaster, but Terrible things to other people. And this is third grade, right? The third grade that you think, okay, hopscotch. And then you throw the ball or dodge the ball or whatever. But I watched this kid take a, in the old days, there were these big wooden chairs.

[00:12:40] Rob Roy: Now they're plastic or they're, or they're just these flimsy thing. But in the old days, there was these big, thick wooden chairs that last a hundred years. He cracked them over the head. I remember the sound of the chair hitting this kid over the head and chair. And I kind of stood there like, what just happened?

[00:12:56] Rob Roy: But in, in reality, in my, in my upbringing in that particular neighborhood, that was a norm. That was a norm to see violence at that, such an early age. And it was like, eh, I can't believe he said that and he got hit in the head with a chair. Whereas it should have been more of a shock. But it also let me know that you know, you can't just trust people to not do things to you, to not attack you.

[00:13:20] Rob Roy: And that goes back to that warrior, that line. It's like protect yourself. Look around, know your surroundings. Know the enemies you're making and what they're capable of doing. If you know you enemies and what they're capable of doing, then you can keep yourself safe and keep your family safe. So that was a lesson in third grade.

[00:13:34] Rob Roy: Know your enemies. Know where they're at. Know where they're coming from. Know what you need to protect yourself. And I am by no means a person that is. I live in fear. I don't, I don't live in fear. I take precautions, but I don't live in any kind of fear. I don't live, I'm not a a person that's sitting around waiting for things to happen to me.

[00:13:58] Rob Roy: I believe that you need to take the fight to the enemy. And what I mean by that is you need to prepare yourself for whatever that's going to be. What are you armed with? If you're armed with your God, if you're armed with weapons, if you're armed with whatever that's going to be, what is it that drives you to be more successful?

[00:14:16] Rob Roy: What is that that drives you, drives you to be prepared? What does it even taste like? So in third grade, I stayed in pretty much the the poor parts of Milwaukee, and this is back in, in the early days. And you say early days, it sounds like it's such a long time ago, but in reality, it wasn't that long ago when segregation was the norm, right?

[00:14:39] Rob Roy: You're talking about the blacks on the one side and you talk to the whites on the other side and the Puerto Ricans and Mexicans on another side. And everybody was divided. Now I know people say, well, the redlining is you're, you're treated unfairly. And yeah, okay. Yeah. But I'm, you know, I'm third grade. I don't care about redline.

[00:14:56] Rob Roy: I don't care about all that other stuff. People tend to take on a [00:15:00] worldview that's not necessarily beneficial to them. My world was the blocks that I lived on, or the block I lived on, and then wherever, whatever route I took to get to school. It wasn't all this other stuff where people were marching. And now look, I'm not saying that that stuff's not important.

[00:15:18] Rob Roy: I'm saying that for a young child, my worldview is my worldview 15 people that I know in the block that I live on. And that is, that's my worldview. And then to give a kid more than that is to basically to hamper your kid's or child's ability to see the world for what it is. Because we can only take in what we can take in.

[00:15:38] Rob Roy: We're not taking it more than that. I'm worried about what's happening over in Afghanistan. If I'm as a child and I'm more worried about what's happening over in Ukraine, if I'm worried about what's happening in Israel, if I'm worried about all those things, I can't. I can't take in any more what's happening with me around me.

[00:16:03] Rob Roy: I gotta, I gotta be the warrior in my neighborhood, not the warrior overseas. I'm not saying you can't do that. I'm just saying that your children need to be understanding, or like for me, I needed to understand where I was at and what I was doing. And so that was my first lesson. Was in fifth grade of a school called Victor Berger.

[00:16:20] Rob Roy: And these life lessons, and I tell people that these life lessons that I learned are roads, right? They're, they're like forks in a road. So you can go one way or the other way. You choose, you make a choice. And what way you're going to go. Now, you don't know where it's going to go. You're driving. I'm going to go left.

[00:16:35] Rob Roy: I'm going to go right. But you need to listen to your heart to tell you what the way to go. As an older person looking back, I made these turns. I made these transitions. I made decisions based on where I thought I was right then. Not, not where to be in the future. Not like, hey, you're going to end up in You know, you're going to be a movie star or something like that.

[00:16:55] Rob Roy: You're going to be a rapper, which wasn't around when I was a kid, or you're going to be playing football. I never thought about that. I thought about where do I need to go to be more comfortable? So Victor Berger, I I went to school and I tried to be the best student I possibly could. And I think I was pretty smart.

[00:17:10] Rob Roy: And I had a a fifth grade teacher says, no one in here is ever going to amount to anything. You're not. Right? We can go to school with, and I don't have any idea, I just remember him saying this, of all the days I was in that school, this is the one day I remember him saying, him saying, no matter what we do, no matter what you do, you guys will never get out of the ghetto.

[00:17:31] Rob Roy: And I think I would say that that's the first time I realized I actually lived in the ghetto. Right? Because it was never referred to that. It was always home. And home is where the heart is. But when people tell you that you're never going to do something, it's what do you do? And I went home to my mom and said, I want to, I don't never want to, I don't want to live in the ghetto.

[00:17:51] Rob Roy: She goes, you don't live in the ghetto, live in a house. She goes over there and said, this teacher told me that we live in a ghetto and we're never going to get out of here. She goes, you don't have to listen to him. He's not in control of your destiny. My mother's a very religious person. She says, God has a plan for you.

[00:18:05] Rob Roy: And you don't know what that is. You're not, you're not, you're not, Open your eyes to that. You need to, you need to believe in that there's a story and there's a mission and there's a, there's a page in the book for you. And I remember that and I said, okay, so I don't remember anything else that happened after that in that school year because it was irrelevant.

[00:18:25] Rob Roy: But I do know my mom took me out of that school and put me in another school. And this one was more, this is like seventh grade. And she chose to put me in this school because she thought it would be the best school with the best people that surrounded me. You surround yourself with your friends. If five of your friends are making a bunch of money, then you're going to make what they're going to make.

[00:18:45] Rob Roy: If five of your friends are not making money, you're going to do what they're going to do. So I believe in her mind because now I'm at a grade higher than what she had when she achieved. Now my mother and father weren't together after I think I was like seven or eight years old. So it's just my mother.

[00:19:00] Rob Roy: So all my input, all my natural motherly influence came from her or influence I got was from my mother. And how do you raise a wolf? Wolves are not very gender specific. My mother wanted me to do well. She's always said that she, I wanted you to be successful. Didn't care what it was. I'm going to give you opportunity.

[00:19:22] Rob Roy: So I went to this magnet school, seven years old, and it was good. It was great. I learned a lot, learned a lot about Matt, learned a lot about other people. Learned that there are people living a different way than I lived and lived in different neighborhoods because we're talking about what made me be where I'm How I got to where I am today.

[00:19:45] Rob Roy: I tell these stories that I've never told anybody before in the past, and when you're listening to me talk about this, it's more in line with who is this person and how did they get here? Now, my later years are a lot [00:20:00] more detailed as far as like what happened to me. These earlier experiences are ones that I remember when I look back in decisions I made or choices I was given.

[00:20:11] Rob Roy: for listening. That I had to make up. So you're talking 60 years and I remember something in seventh grade because that's a road I took. That's a choice I made. A conscious choice to do something different. So we're back to this school called Robert Fulton Addicts and I, I remember the knowing that there were other things out there.

[00:20:34] Rob Roy: There are better places to live. There are better things to do. There were better opportunities for me then. I remember I watched a movie called Old Geller back then. Right. What's, what do we remember about Old Yeller? Yeah. We remember the dog getting shot. 

[00:20:48] David Pasqualone: Yeah. I was just going to say. It was very emotional, 

[00:20:51] Rob Roy: right?

[00:20:52] Rob Roy: Yeah. I remember the dog getting shot. I remember, that's right. I said, it's just like, it was so emotional for me. And then it brought out other things that had happened. And I wouldn't say that it brought out other things that happened to me, but it was the most emotional experience I'd had at that point.

[00:21:06] Rob Roy: One, I was finally got to go to a movie theater and two, that this dog was killed so viciously. Now that's what I remember. I don't know if the dog died or not. That's like the movie Shane, they go, when are you coming back, Shane? And he's riding away. And then people, people argue whether or not that he was dead when he rode away on the horse.

[00:21:26] Rob Roy: Do you remember the movie Shane? 

[00:21:27] David Pasqualone: I don't remember the movie Shane, but I do remember Old Yeller. And I do remember seeing it at the theater and I remember crying with my friends and I remember getting a pencil case or something like, remember in those days they gave gifts at the theater if you went, yeah, if you went during certain times, they give away gifts to get you in, right.

[00:21:45] David Pasqualone: And I remember that. I do remember feeling that emotion. Being so sad. 

[00:21:49] Rob Roy: Yeah, so sad. It was probably one of the saddest movies I've ever seen. Even today, , I haven't seen it since then. 'cause I'm a, you know, I'm not a, a big strong guy, but I'm like, I mean, I may cry in that thing again. 'cause I remember because I was young then, I, I was so young when I was old, young.

[00:22:03] Rob Roy: But it made an impact in my life and I knew that the depths of emotion at that point. I can watch something and then I could cry and, and, and what, what are we 60 years later? We're probably 45 years later. And I still have the same emotional response from seeing that movie the first time. There's a couple other things that happened to me between third grade, probably second grade to the seventh grade.

[00:22:27] Rob Roy: I want to talk about, and it's like, we talked before and I said, I'm going to share some things I never talked about before. And I want to say that people live with clouds in their life, they live with trauma, and trauma tends to dictate how a person responds to things in the future. And it's taken me years to get over this.

[00:22:49] Rob Roy: Once I realized this happened to me and I was, I was basically sexually assaulted, not basically sexually, I was sexually assaulted, when I was probably eight, eight or nine years old. That's the least I can remember. And I couldn't tell you how many times it happened. I just know it happened the one time.

[00:23:04] Rob Roy: And I can, I, I visually recall everything that happened. And I struggled with that, up until like a few years ago. I went to therapy, actually. And how a person could rob the innocence of a child like that. I don't know for years how I was around people, but my own children and my grandchildren and any young person I see, I'm more protective of them because of that.

[00:23:38] Rob Roy: And what people say and what they do. I'm hyper sensitive to it. I'm hyper aware of it. And maybe that's what I'm, maybe that's what it's supposed to be. I work with kids all the time now. I don't work with young kids. I work with older kids. I raised my grandson. And I'm, I'm still today hyper aware of who my kids are around.

[00:23:58] Rob Roy: And I, I tend to believe that that's a good thing. Not the trauma, but I'm hyper aware of. People around my children or around my kids or my grandkids or other kids and the purpose for why they would want to be around a child or the purpose of why they want to dress a kid a certain way the purpose and the why of why are they paying so much attention to that child because of what happened to me.

[00:24:26] Rob Roy: I don't see pedophiles around the corner but I do think that my anxiety and my vigilance goes up when this happens because it happened to me. My entire spec or career, and I'm sure there are other people that went through similar things because it happens a lot more frequently than people think and not to be able to talk about it, not to be able to share it with, you know, my wife didn't know I've never shared it with a girlfriend.

[00:24:52] Rob Roy: I never shared it with anybody except for this, this, your audience and my therapist. So that's why I'm not so [00:25:00] emotional with it. 

[00:25:00] David Pasqualone: No, and I thank you for being so transparent and open and only talk about it as deep as you want, but like, I'm like, I'm getting emotional because it's just to think when children have abuse and there's different forms of sexual abuse.

[00:25:20] David Pasqualone: Like you said, how could someone do that to a child? And then you have to process it. But then at the same time, God gives us all certain traits. And you mentioned the lion, the wolf, and different characteristics. And if you are born to be a lion and you have that protector in you already, people don't understand that, that a lot of times people think, go, you're overprotective.

[00:25:40] David Pasqualone: No, that's a gift number one, to protect those around you. And you like sacrifice in some ways without even realizing to help others. So now you get hyper, hyper sensitivity to it. So I guess let's start with what are some of the things you did or maybe it comes later in your story. What are the some of the things you did with your therapist to let you get to the point where you can talk about it, where you can work through it?

[00:26:06] David Pasqualone: Because there's people older than us 70 years. And they literally have had a miserable existence because they've never talked about it. They've never worked through it. So what would you say to those people who are struggling right now? 

[00:26:22] Rob Roy: The, the hardest thing to do is to acknowledge it happened. We tend to want to compensate a trait that I shouldn't say a trait, a a a defense mechanism that most people have is to compensate by saying, I must've done something.

[00:26:40] Rob Roy: Or that, that, that probably didn't happen the way I think it happened, or I remember it differently, or what was I doing? Basically to control what happened, you take on the pain of the incident to say, yeah, that it must've been something I did, something we addressed. Because I can tell you, I don't even know how I even got in that bed.

[00:27:05] Rob Roy: All I remember is the landing bed and getting penetrated and not knowing what that feeling was. I will, I will say this about

[00:27:19] Rob Roy: people that have gone through this is that it's, it, it, it, it can create other people, right? So, so you get assaulted and then you're like, you don't know what that feeling is. You don't have an idea. You're, you're, you're chasing it, right? You're chasing that feeling, depending on what it was, who it was with, and when it happened.

[00:27:46] Rob Roy: You may not be aware that your body, because your body's different than your mind, your body may be attracted and become hyper sexualized because that's a feeling that you don't understand what it is, but you understand that either that it's something that you're, that your body's comfortable with.

[00:28:04] Rob Roy: I'm not trying to say that people who are assaulted have sexual desires, but they do become hyper sexual afterwards. So you, you're a lot of pedophiles create other pedophiles because that's what happens, right? You don't just become a pedophile, you get assaulted and you become a pedophile or a person that desires certain sexual aspects.

[00:28:24] Rob Roy: And that takes away from your spirit of who you are because it consumes you. You know, with my therapist, I had issues. I had accelerated relationships. I had, you know, the porn addiction I had, uh, you know, the sexual desires that I shouldn't have had with porn and, you know abusing women and all those things.

[00:28:44] Rob Roy: And I can get, you can draw a line straight back to my, my being assaulted. And how I treated women at some point. I apologize to anyone I've dated and treated them wrongly. It's because, and I'm not saying because of that, because I'm an aware person. I'm a conscious being, but when I talked to my therapist about it, it's like, yeah, pretty much all your sexual problems are from when this incident happened, because you're, cause most people won't talk about it.

[00:29:14] Rob Roy: And then when you don't talk about it and you don't share, you don't bring it out. If you don't bring it out in the open, you don't put light on it. Then it stays in the darkness, and when it happens in the darkness, then anything can happen. It doesn't stay that one traumatic event, it creates other traumatic events in your life.

[00:29:32] David Pasqualone: It's not a, yeah, go ahead. No, I didn't mean to cut you off. There's a slight delay, so I apologize. No, I mean, if someone doesn't believe in God, If they have their head in any form of reality, it's documented. And if you know somebody, if you yourself, you're not meant as an adult to be molested or raped, let alone as a child.

[00:29:58] David Pasqualone: You can't like [00:30:00] rationally work through the issues, right? So you're basically miswired and rewired and not in a healthy way. And it's not because you did anything wrong. It's because someone did something wrong to you. And now you have to learn. To undo the knots. And like you say, I don't know anybody personally, myself included, who's been molested in some way, who it didn't carry through, you talk about it.

[00:30:26] David Pasqualone: And then the Bible for those who are Christians, the whole book of 1 John, that's one of my favorite books in the Bible, very short, just a few chapters. But it talks about exactly what you're saying, Rob, bringing things in the light. And it talks about how, if you bring things in the light, they heal. But if you keep things in the darkness.

[00:30:45] David Pasqualone: Bad things grow. So talking through it and working through it, sometimes it takes a moment, sometimes it takes years, but it's necessary. And I love what you said, how just accepting it happened to you is huge. So thank you for being so open and real. 

[00:31:04] Rob Roy: I want to add my faith has, it's helped me as well. My, like I said before, my mother was a Christian.

[00:31:09] Rob Roy: I was a Christian. I was raised Christian and I never had a problem in the church, but you know, you can't bring that up in the church. You can't just say, Hey, I was assaulted. You can't, I don't, I don't know if it's in my, it was in my head at the time. But I didn't, I, I didn't think it was a safe mind. This is me, not the church.

[00:31:32] Rob Roy: I didn't think it was a safe place to say that because everybody's Christians. Everybody, I'm going to say in my, in my child mind, everybody's pure, pure. And then if I bring up something like this and somehow I'm going to look, this is what we do, compensating, right? We compensate. We, we go, okay, I'm not going to bring it up because I don't want people to look down on me.

[00:31:54] Rob Roy: I don't want people to feel sorry for me. I'm not going to tell the people, these are the closest people to me because I went to church every Sunday. And this happened not with a church member, this happened with a family friend, my mom, one of my mom's friends. So you got to bring it out into the light.

[00:32:09] Rob Roy: You got to share with somebody that, that you, one you trust. I wouldn't walk up to some, and I say that because I'm on a podcast talking to, you know, hundreds of thousands of people but I think it's something in my journey, in my life, that I wanted to share, like when we talked before, I said I want to share some things about me, I want to bring them out to the light, and I don't want them to be secret anymore, you know, 45 years, 50 years of being a secret it, it's hard on you, it is, So, Unbelievably hard on you.

[00:32:41] Rob Roy: And it goes from the way you dress in the locker room, when you walk into the showers, when you run other mails, and it's all these things. That you think are small things that are actually big things that affect your, your, your success. And I know we're not talking about this all the way through, but I do want to just bring that up and say that it, you needed, if you're another person out there that's going to something like that, reach out to somebody and talk to them and let them know.

[00:33:11] Rob Roy: And it's not whether or not they empathize with you. It's not whether they have sympathy for you. It's whether or not you get it out into the light and you release all that the shadows from your soul. And you feel better. You won't feel better right away, but you will feel better. And not to look for any answers of why it happened to you, because you won't get them.

[00:33:29] Rob Roy: You just won't get them. Yeah. And it always The question would be, is 

[00:33:37] David Pasqualone: No, no, no. Go. This is your show, brother. I mean, go. I say, yeah. 

[00:33:41] Rob Roy: I was to say that the question would be, well, when did I find out? Well, obviously I knew when I was a child, but I blacked it out. Like there's memories that are gone that I blacked out for years.

[00:33:56] Rob Roy: So there, so you can ask me what happened then? I, I don't know. I just don't, I don't remember. 'cause I just picked that chunk of memory and just chunked it, got rid of it. But I will say anything that's section of the nature of that, what happened to me, freaks me out. Like, well, put me in a corner trembling, just, just trembling.

[00:34:15] Rob Roy: And I'm a big guy. I'm like 2 86 1. And so there's things that could happen to me now, not, not so much now, but before that would put me in a, a state of, of that child again, that child that was assaulted. So when I was I think I was 40 years old, I was driving back from LA for one of my gigs up there.

[00:34:34] Rob Roy: And I was talking to my mom. I used to talk to my mom on my long drives. And no, I was like, Hey, I'm having these dreams. It's not like that. Like I'm having these dreams, like my marijuana. Now I was like, Hey mom, I'm having these dreams. I'm not sure exactly what they were. Now this conversation with her, The lead up to that was, there were months on those phone calls when I was driving home that I wanted to ask her, but just never really, you know, you got to find the moment, you're always trying to find the [00:35:00] moment to ask, and you're afraid if you say something wrong, you know, what is my month, compensate me again.

[00:35:06] Rob Roy: What would my mother think if I asked her this question? Did this really happen to me? Am I making this stuff up? What's going to be the conversation? Because we compensate, right, for the other people in our lives. This particular day, I said, I'm going to ask her. I would say I was on the phone. How are you doing?

[00:35:20] Rob Roy: Blah, blah, blah. And before we got into the, you know, the pleasantries, I said, Hey, I'm having these dreams about, I think something happened to me when I was a kid. She's like, what happened to you as a kid? So I think that's this guy. And she goes, you, this is what my mother says. She says, you don't have to worry about him anymore.

[00:35:37] Rob Roy: Cause he's still in jail. That was it. That was the end of the conversation. You don't have to worry about him because he's still in jail. And I was like, what? You know, that was my confirmation. It really did happen. And I'm like, you knew about it. And so I was like, oh, she's a, you don't have to talk any more about it, baby.

[00:36:07] Rob Roy: He's in jail. You don't have to worry about it. So now I had confirmation. And that started the journey to go back with a therapist, you know, for like 10 years, go back and try to, one, find a therapist that I could talk to, and two, somebody I was comfortable with, bring it up. So we asked earlier, you know, people were out there going through the same thing.

[00:36:26] Rob Roy: I'm like, it's not an easy journey to bring it up, especially when you're older. It's even worse if you have to ask your parents. And I feel for, as a therapist, I feel for, for women that have been assaulted and sexual stuff, because you can't bring it. Who are you going to bring it up to? Yeah. Who can you bring it up to?

[00:36:43] Rob Roy: These, these victims that are out there that are, that are constantly, you know, being attacked. And if you want to use the Bible, you want to say that Satan plants a seed and that seed, sexual assault or whatever that's going to be, spreads to other things, then that's what it is. You know, what makes us do the things?

[00:37:07] Rob Roy: What's the, what whispers do we listen to? The one that's easy. are the one that's hard. The one that's easy usually causes us a lot of emotional trauma. The one that's hard is, like you said earlier, following God's light. The one that's easy is, it's not. It's the devil's way of seating you and dragging you down.

[00:37:30] Rob Roy: I don't normally talk like that, but that's exactly what it is when I try to explain to people. It's like, yeah, that guy that's on your left hand shoulder, whispering to you, telling you how easy it is and what you can get away with, that, that's not your friend. The other guys taking, taking the hard road, being the lion, that's the hard one.

[00:37:45] Rob Roy: Because that's your rest of your life. So, you know, those are, those are, you know, we're talking about up to my 8th, 8th 7th grade. Another, another thing that, life changing moment for me. Because that's what I'm going over is my life changing moments to get me before I became a SEAL. Like, what are the paths I took?

[00:38:08] Rob Roy: Where did I go? We got the assaults. We got the victimization or the hitting over the head, being situation aware. Or the assaults of taking care of myself, the demons that are in my soul. We have the, here's an opportunity for you to become better. Here's another person telling you you're not going to do well.

[00:38:25] Rob Roy: Two people, one in seventh grade, one in fifth grade, telling me one says, hey, you can do great things. The other one says you're not. These are all the things that are formulating in my head. As I move on, I'm driving, I get transferred. And then we're talking about segregation. And my my father's father, my mother's boyfriend, my father lives probably Three blocks from us.

[00:38:48] Rob Roy: Remember I said earlier that you live on your block. My dad lived three, three blocks from us. So I never knew he was, he may as well have been in another state because I didn't travel outside my area. I would go to the bus stop, but I never traveled in that direction. When you live in those type of neighborhoods, you don't really, you don't, you don't go on a walkabout.

[00:39:07] Rob Roy: You stay in your neighborhood. So it's 

[00:39:09] David Pasqualone: unsafe. And for people who don't understand, they've never been in that situation. It's like, These are your parameters, and sometimes going back and forth to school, you're fighting your way home anyways. But then if you go outside of your neighborhood, you're not belonging there, and you're in real trouble.

[00:39:24] David Pasqualone: So it's, it's real. It's in America. It's in every country. But if you've never lived that life, like Rob's talking about, you, one more thing to praise God for. 

[00:39:35] Rob Roy: Yeah, that, that, that path to your school is safe. That path outside your area is not, you know, talking about grocery stores and everything else. You just, you just, you can't do it.

[00:39:44] Rob Roy: I remember growing up 

[00:39:45] David Pasqualone: and the kids at the top of the street and the bottom of the street used to fight all the time. It's like two separate places all together. 

[00:39:52] Rob Roy: Yeah, it is. It is. It's a, it's a, it's a weird, I will say this about my neighborhood is [00:40:00] that. I'm jumping around a little bit because it's important because we're just talking about this.

[00:40:07] Rob Roy: You know, the kids, you know, people usually move where the kids are at and of the people in my neighborhood that's alive for my age. I I can't mention this guy's name without his permission, but he was not somebody I looked up to, but somebody that was a rough and tough and probably a year older than me.

[00:40:30] Rob Roy: With the prison. I don't know what he did, but I came home once after joining the military as a seal. And he's car sitting out front of my mom's house and some guys waiting in a car and I'm like, you know, my spidey senses is up. He gets out of car and like what the? What the heck? I'm going to get into a fight in front of my mother's house.

[00:40:50] Rob Roy: He goes, are you Rob Roy? And I'm like, yeah, I'm Robert. I'm like, you know, I, I dropped back. Yeah. I'm Robert. Like, who the heck are you? He goes, Hey man, just relax. I'm just, I'm, I'm, I'm the guy across the street. My name is XYZ, you know? And I say, what? And then he had a nickname. Everybody has nicknames. My name, my nickname was white Rob, by the way, white Rob, white Rob.

[00:41:13] Rob Roy: Nobody called me that to my face. They called me white Rob. 

[00:41:16] David Pasqualone: Why did they call you? Yeah, I used 

[00:41:17] Rob Roy: to go to all these, like, you know, these schools, because I went to all these white schools. I was, I didn't go to school in the neighborhood. After fifth grade, after that guy said that to my mom, I never went to, I never went to another black school ever.

[00:41:28] Rob Roy: I went to all white schools after that. Because when I came back, they would be like, there's white Rob. It's like, but he said, you know, man, I'm glad you got out. Because in the neighborhood, they call it you getting out. They don't like you moved on. It's like you got out. Like you got out of the neighborhood.

[00:41:45] Rob Roy: And I was like surprised when I was talking to him because I got a daughter. I've been in prison for a bunch of years. I didn't see her until I got out. I'm just trying to be the best man. I can be. You're talking about 40 something years old. And he's saying, I'm trying to be the best man I can be now.

[00:42:01] Rob Roy: That's a lot. I don't know what he went through. I, I think his, his, his journey was different than mine, but for him to find me and then talk to me about it, which made me proud of myself that I said, I got, I guess I made good decisions, but inside I got all these other demons that are running around inside my head.

[00:42:16] Rob Roy: So I still haven't made good decisions. I've still got all this stuff that that's, you know, I hadn't dealt with the assault at that point. I still was not good to women around me. You know, I had my own demons I was dealing with and that's what they are. They're with you everywhere you go, helping you make decisions.

[00:42:29] Rob Roy: Till getting back to high school, my, my dad, my, my father, or I can't say his name either, but this guy was I remember going to the school. I remember this so vividly as when people take you out of your environment and they put you in another environment, people are like, well, just bus them. Yeah.

[00:42:49] Rob Roy: That's, that's great. Except for it's a different culture. If you go five blocks from your neighborhood, it's a different culture. You ship somebody 45 minutes from where they live. It's a completely different culture. I went to the suburbs and people out there called their dad's dad, right? And they'd been with them since they were children.

[00:43:10] Rob Roy: That didn't happen where I live. So you, your dad was the latest boyfriend your mom had. And I know people were saying, your mom was a Christian, how could she have a bunch of boyfriends? Yeah. Yeah, it happens because you got to survive. When you gotta eat, when you gotta survive, you do whatever you can to survive.

[00:43:29] Rob Roy: I don't chastise my mother for the decisions she made because I'm a product of what she did for me. But when you have to eat, you eat. And when you can't eat, a person that, that's hungry, that has food, eat when they want to. They become lazy. A person that has to survive, that's hungry, is gonna do whatever they can to feed their family.

[00:43:53] Rob Roy: That is straight up the honest truth. I don't chastise on decisions for the I don't know my mother. My mother had a sixth grade education. She worked her ass off in the hospital for 30 years. Never took a sick day. She led prayer classes. I can get into that later, but she was an unbelievable person.

[00:44:10] Rob Roy: Once we were out of the house and she didn't have that weight of raising those kids, my mother became this unbelievable Christian. Giving back to the neighborhood. Had a food pantry. It's a lot of things. But before that, to get us to where we needed to be, You know, she was this guy. Now the story about this guy is, he made me work, took me out, work ethic, right?

[00:44:32] Rob Roy: How do you train a lion? How do you train a wolf? You make them work. They, they get experience. We learn, a character's developed from the hard work and the discipline. He would drop me off, he had a lawn care service, he would drop me off at these apartments and then say, cut the grass, I'll be back in the afternoon and you'll cut the other side.

[00:44:52] Rob Roy: It's like I'm 15 years old. I'm like, what? Lawn mowers and gas, got this [00:45:00] grass on this side. I'll be back around lunchtime, 8 o'clock in the morning. That's four hours. You couldn't do that now because of labor laws. Tomorrow you're gonna weed whack. And I was like, oh, I get to cut this grass so I can use that weed whacker.

[00:45:18] Rob Roy: Because I was like, the weed whacker is cool, right? Did not, not knowing you work in 17, 18 hours on the weekend, but and I told him at my mother passed, I said, you know, I got work ethic from you and I appreciate everything you've done. I went up to him at the funeral and I said, you know, we don't, we don't talk much.

[00:45:32] Rob Roy: We don't talk at all, but I want to let you know that all that work. When I was a kid, you know, you put me out there and you made me think for myself. You made me know that there's a better world out there. And I don't, I would say today, I don't know if he did that because he thought I was going to be who I was, but the fact that I got those lessons from him, I'm appreciative of it.

[00:45:54] Rob Roy: I told him, I said, I'm appreciative. I'm a Navy SEAL because of it. It's a great work ethic. I know when I need to get things done. I know the quality of work because he was like, this is not done right. You got to do it over. But I remember driving with him cause my school, they were all like, you know, dad this, dad that, dad that.

[00:46:10] Rob Roy: As a kid from the ghetto, or from my neighborhood, and you're talking to other kids and they're telling you about their dads and what their dad said to them and what their dad would expect from them and what they're going to do for college college You know, the, it's a missing link in my neighborhood.

[00:46:32] Rob Roy: I have a dad that promoted you and helped you and work with you and work with your hands. So I was driving home with him from school. He picked me up once and he was driving home from school and it's a 45 minute drive. And I said to him, About midway and I can tell you there's in Milwaukee is a place called the Cost Factory KOSS.

[00:46:52] Rob Roy: They make speakers. And why that's so important because indelibly when things happen to you, you remember that moment in time. And I said to him, I said, you know, as we're driving down the highway, I think it was a 94, and I said to him, I said, hey, you know, you got to bring it up, right? We're about halfway through the drive.

[00:47:12] Rob Roy: And I said, hey I just want to know, you know, it's like, You know, Ken the kids at school are, they're all talking about their dad's this, and their dad's that, and, you know, I don't know what to call you, and, and I just want to know if I can just call you dad, because everybody, and he stopped me. He says, I'm not your dad.

[00:47:31] Rob Roy: You gotta have a dad. And I was like, yeah, but, but, you know, like, what? And I'll say that every memory after that with him, I don't have. Sheldon. And that's hard. It's hard on a boy, and I decided that because of all the other things that happened to me at that point, that I need to get out and be on my own.

[00:47:57] Rob Roy: I was 14. Like, I got to get out and be on my own. I don't like the trauma because that first trauma you get, It's built on that second trauma, and then that third trauma, and then that fourth trauma, and then that fifth trauma, and then that sixth trauma, and they just get worse, and it gets worse. It's like weights to put on your shoulder.

[00:48:14] Rob Roy: And if you don't do something different, then those weights are going to drag you down. I call it the Ghetto Claw. And at 14, I need to get out of here. So I decided that day, I need to leave. I need to get out of this environment that I'm in. Now, was that me talking, or was that God saying, Hey, there's a message for you.

[00:48:35] Rob Roy: Like my mother said, there's going to be great things happen to you. And I just say that over my mom said, I'm going to be good. Things are going to happen to me. I need to remember that my mom said things were just happening to me. Mom said, God's going to take care. And mom says, there's a path for me.

[00:48:48] Rob Roy: It's the only person I was getting that from. No one else was telling me that. That, you know, there's a plan for me. And I didn't know what that was. I think she may have thought that I wanted to become a pastor or a preacher because I was kind of on that path meaning I was involved with the church a lot, but I was definitely afraid to speak.

[00:49:09] Rob Roy: And I was like, Mom, I can't be a pastor. I'm afraid to talk to people. I'm afraid of what people would think about me. It goes back to that compensating again. I'm making excuses before I even do anything. So my mom at 14, I said, I'm going to, I'm going to leave as soon as I possibly can. And, you know, this is your 14 year old kid telling his mom about it.

[00:49:35] Rob Roy: So what about school? Well, I still know I'm going to finish high school and I'm going to be good at what I do. But I realized that there were two worlds I was in. There was the segregated, self imposed black ghetto. You know, that no one's going to go anywhere. And then there's this suburbian school that, that accepted me, but not accepted me.

[00:49:59] Rob Roy: And I'm not [00:50:00] saying that that the people that's, it's just a different culture because my black friends that were out there were just like the kids in the suburbs. So you, you gotta go with culture, right? You can't go, well, it's black and white. It's not, it's just that those kids had money. In my opinion, we didn't.

[00:50:13] Rob Roy: Those, those, all those kids had parents. I had a parent. And years later, when I go, when I go back there now, I'm still friends with all my friends from back then as well. I think that a young person trying to find their way can get lost unbelievably fast. If they're not shown the right way. Now, I'm not saying shepherd them because I think being a, being a sheep is not the way to go.

[00:50:43] Rob Roy: I mean, giving them the tools to become lions or become wolves so they can get the experience and build a character who they are, which I already had because I started working for my mother's boyfriend for a while and I was on my own pretty much. I was a middle child as well. All those lessons, all those things that happened.

[00:51:00] Rob Roy: I remember one of the, one of the, Another point in my life was when I was probably 16, probably 17 years old, and I had a, I decided that I'm going to start doing my homework the way it should be done. I put a lot of work and effort into it. And one of my teachers says, there's no way that you or Cape did it.

[00:51:26] Rob Roy: Because. I've never seen it. I don't believe it. I don't think this is your work. And I was like, no, I actually did this so I could take that to one or two. And I'll tell you which way I went, but there's one or two ways. Like, screw it. I'm not going to do it anymore. Screw them. I'm going to, I'm going to screw them.

[00:51:39] Rob Roy: I'm not going to do any more homework. I'm not going to do it the way, you know, I'm just going to fade off and I'll be like all these other kids. I'll be in the basement classes or you go, not only am I capable of doing this kind of work, I can do more. The easy thing would be screw it. The hard thing is to be like, I'm just going to duplicate my efforts and I don't care what you do.

[00:52:02] Rob Roy: The thing about being the best that you can be is that a lot of times it's better than the people that are around you. And what people tend to, tend to not focus on is you are the best that you can be when you're the best that you can be. I know that sounds crazy, but I told my nephew this the other day.

[00:52:20] Rob Roy: I said, I want you to be the best that you can be. Which means that what you're doing is going to be better than everybody else's. And his question to me, cause I I'm bringing him into my life because of his family problems back with his, his parents. And I said, man, the reason I said your products are gonna be better than them.

[00:52:39] Rob Roy: Cause I think you're better than they are. So by contrast, if you're going to do whatever you're going to do, you're a hundred percent, it's going to be there 50%. But if you're 50%, is there a hundred percent, you're not giving a hundred percent of your effort. He looked at me and said, I don't understand.

[00:52:56] Rob Roy: I'm thinking to myself, of course you don't, because no one ever told you that you're better than everybody else. I didn't say that part to him. And I was thinking to myself, I said, of course he doesn't, because no one's ever told him he could do more. They've always told him he can be less. They've always told him that you're never going to amount to anything.

[00:53:12] Rob Roy: I mean, the reason he's with me is because People thought he was, you know, he's a knucklehead. He couldn't get things done or he wasn't functioning properly. He's a hundred. He's an ace. Well, not a hundred percent, but he's an A student now. Right. Do I have issues with him? Of course I do. But I, I'm raising him to be a lion.

[00:53:28] Rob Roy: I'm raising him to be a wolf. I'm raising him to be a person that's going to be a functional member of society. Right. I'm raising him with God because he has to have something. He has to have a shield. You can't work out with the, you can't protect yourself with your personality. It doesn't work that way, because the demons are always there.

[00:53:45] Rob Roy: The demons are there even when you don't think they're there. They're whispering into you. Slow, consistent voices that are constantly telling you, Take the easy way out. Drink and drive. Don't pay your debts. Spend that money. There's another payday. Go into debt. Get her pregnant. Don't worry about it. Don't pay child support.

[00:54:11] Rob Roy: Don't pay your car insurance. Don't do all these things because then you get pulled. It's not my fault. It is your fault. You're 100 percent responsible for anything that happens in your life. I'll get back on track, but my, but after all that, when I was 14, 15 years old and when my, my mother's boyfriend, and then my Subsequent to, I'm going to be, I'm going to do what I'm doing.

[00:54:33] Rob Roy: I possibly can. I decided, I don't know if you remember this, but my heroes when I was a kid, for you older people out there, my heroes were the people I saw on television, you know, the black and white, and we only had three channels when I was growing up. So UHF baby. Yeah. Yeah. It's like I watched Bob Hope.

[00:54:53] Rob Roy: Yep. Anybody remember Bob Hope? I watched him on a not a USO show. I watched him on an old Navy thing, him [00:55:00] and I forget who he was with, but Bob did a thing where he was joking around on the ship. And I thought, well, that's the life, you know, making the jokes and, you know, being a sailor. And I thought, that's what I want to do.

[00:55:11] Rob Roy: I was 15 or 16 years old, watching TV. That's what I want to do. And I want to, I want to do that. I want to do that. And I will say that I had only went to one movie theater at that point, and that was when I saw Old Yeller. I hadn't gone to the movies, we couldn't afford it, so it was Old Yeller and then on television, Bob Hope.

[00:55:30] Rob Roy: And I thought, and my, my, my superheroes were the comic books. So anything in a comic book, I thought, I could be like this, because comic books makes you be, they make, they show you that you, you, you, when you're reading them, you become that character, you become Superman, Batman, whatever, you're just not reading it, you're, you're becoming that, It's integrity and drive and, and it's not about the rewards you receive.

[00:55:53] Rob Roy: It's about the character of the characters that you're reading. So growing up, I thought I wanted to serve. I wanted to be of service. I wanted to do things to help other people. And I decided I'm gonna join the Navy. So at 17 years old, when I could sign up, I signed up for the Navy. And when you know it, they said, you're not smart enough to become an officer.

[00:56:17] Rob Roy: This guy said to me, he says cause some guy said, Hey, you got these two young brothers that you should sign them up to become officers and we're standing there and he goes, they're not smart enough to become officers. And I was like, I was like, what, what? They're not smart enough to become officers.

[00:56:38] Rob Roy: And I was, I was like, I, and I remember that. Cause I was like, well, I haven't even taken the test yet. You know, and it bothered me when I was in the Navy that he'd always said, obviously it bothers me now. But I remember telling him, him saying that to me and I'm thinking to myself, he didn't even give us a chance.

[00:56:55] Rob Roy: Like he's black. I'm black. He should be like, yeah, let's see what we can do. You got a year left in high school. He didn't have my grades and have anything. But to be fair, I wasn't a good student, but I was driven, but I graduated. I was successful in the school I was at. I wasn't a formal student because I didn't get going until You're transferring from the city to the suburb school, it's going to be another couple of years, right?

[00:57:18] Rob Roy: So it took me two years to get back on track in school. It was good though. I joined the Navy, became an And that's more hard 

[00:57:24] David Pasqualone: work. I do want to point out, cause anytime you're behind and you just try to get to even, you have to work two or three times as hard. So that I think, I don't want to speak for you, but that probably pushed you into more greatness of hard work.

[00:57:38] David Pasqualone: Would you say that's accurate? 

[00:57:40] Rob Roy: Well, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, yeah. Yeah. A hundred percent. Cause you're, you're, you're, you're not only it's, it's, it's the culture you're going into, but it's also when you're, I told my nephew, I just told my nephew this, I said. It's easier to catch up, or easier to keep up than catch up.

[00:57:55] Rob Roy: Yeah. So if you come in two years behind, you're, you're working your ass off to get to where everybody else is. Your, your growth model was large, it's from here. But in reality, you're just catching up to where everybody else is. And they're still, and they're, and they're not slowing down. And this thing we called Life, they're not slowing down so you can catch up.

[00:58:13] Rob Roy: They're accelerating with, with tutors and testing and, you know, and having a plan. When your family, and this is what I wanted to mention earlier, when your family's involved in your education to become better, your family's involved in your legacy, your dad wants you to become a doctor because he's a doctor, your dad owned the business, you have that.

[00:58:34] Rob Roy: When you come from the ghetto or from, what do you have? What do you want? Which is why so many NFL players are in debt. They try to bring everybody with them, but they don't have that foundation, that, that intelligence financial literacy, I should say, not intelligent, but financial literacy to make those kinds of moves and make those kinds of steps to go to the next level.

[00:58:57] Rob Roy: Everything's about their physical ability. And there's always, and I'm not talking specifically about football players. I mean, anybody that's uses just a talent to become successful and not their brain to become successful. There's always going to be a cost. Emotionally, physically, and if there's some trauma involved in that, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna focus on, on that part of it.

[00:59:17] Rob Roy: It's going to be there. It's just, it's just in the wings and no one knows where it's, no one knows you're probably doing it or experiencing it, but it's there. It doesn't go away. Trauma sits in the body and waits. Whether it's cortisol, which is stress, or it's, it's something that's always in your system.

[00:59:37] Rob Roy: And then you need to, like I say, you gotta, you gotta, you gotta get it out in the light. Yeah, so I, I decided to join the Navy. I went to the Navy. Now, now one thing I will say, I'm gonna go back for a second, is that my, my mother, as wonderful as she was she never came to any of my sporting events. I ran track and field, did football, [01:00:00] I tried gymnastics, but was hazed, and a sexual hazing brought back my traumas when I was a kid, and, and I didn't understand what hazing was.

[01:00:10] Rob Roy: I, I, I didn't think it was racist. I thought it was just, it was too and they don't know this now. And if they're listening to your podcast, they'll be like, Oh, I remember that. We did that to him. It was like, yeah, it wasn't about what they did to me. It's how I felt. I felt victimized again with, you know, I don't know why.

[01:00:28] Rob Roy: Men want to do the things sometimes that they do. 

[01:00:31] David Pasqualone: Cause they have issues. You know, we, you know, yeah, that's just, it really comes down to it. I used to have to rationalize when I'd get bullied or picked on or hazed. And then you grow up and you have more knowledge, but it hurts. Like you said, you can still probably feel some of that emotion right now.

[01:00:47] David Pasqualone: But if we can stop for a second. This person is who they are because of things that happened to them. That doesn't excuse their behavior or make it right, but they're an asshat because they were molested or treated badly. And now shit rolls downhill and they're treating you badly. So it doesn't give them the right, and they probably need a punch in the face at times, but that's, you know, they had trauma and they're returning the evil instead of love.

[01:01:14] Rob Roy: Right. Well, because of that voice that said, this is easier than that voice that said, this is hard. Yeah. So I didn't, I didn't, obviously I didn't do the, I didn't do the gymnastics team. And there was no way that I was going to be wrestling because, because of the mounts. The first time I had to mount, I was like, yeah, I was like, whoa, no.

[01:01:36] David Pasqualone: I love wrestling and jujitsu, but my mom wouldn't come to watch me. She came to in three years, she came to one meet and no joke, that's the meet. I blew my knee out. So she never came again. But yeah, there is definitely some oddities and you're in single. Did your team wear singlets? 

[01:01:51] Rob Roy: Yeah. Yeah. 

[01:01:52] David Pasqualone: Yeah. So that would be absolutely the 

[01:01:55] Rob Roy: same thing.

[01:01:55] Rob Roy: Super sexual gymnastics as well. 

[01:01:58] David Pasqualone: Yeah. 

[01:01:58] Rob Roy: So the only difference is alpha, 

[01:02:01] David Pasqualone: usually the alpha male mindsets and wrestling and gymnastics has some other things going on. Oh, yeah. 

[01:02:08] Rob Roy: Yeah, so I did that. And then I played football. My mom Oh, you know what? I forgot about this story. Yeah, there's one. I tell them my kids all the time about waiting for other people.

[01:02:20] Rob Roy: I'm going to go back a couple of years, you know, like, yeah, sixth grade or second, because it's important. I used to, my mom used to give me money to take the bus. I used to play drums. And I would go to this special clinic in the city because there's a lot of, the thing about the being in that neighborhood and, and in the government resources that are available, they're always government resource because people need to eat.

[01:02:45] Rob Roy: I don't mean the people that live there. I mean, the people, and this is a negative thing, by the way, is that our government. Takes you on as a child, as a dependent of the state. So what does the dependent of the state need? They need entertainment. Well, who's going to do it? Well, we're going to hire these people to do it because we're going to pay them really, really, really, really well to provide the entertainment for you, or to provide a school for you, or to provide something for you.

[01:03:09] Rob Roy: So you have a lot of people that come into the city, government employees, and they provide whatever. Right? Because they're paid. And then the poor kids get to go and listen to them, tell them, tell you about how you can become better and so on and so forth. But a friend of mine, I used to take the bus.

[01:03:28] Rob Roy: No, I'm sorry, we didn't, I didn't take the bus. I would get bus fare to take the bus to go to the school to play drums. I would walk down to my friend's house and then I would wait for my friend because we were he was playing saxophone to play drums and let's say I had to be there at nine o'clock and my friend had to be there at 9 15 and every time I showed up at this guy's house he was never ready because it was like 8 30 and then we would leave and I would get this I would get the drum practice 10 minutes late and he would be on time for the entire season I think it was this summer and I do you know I would be so upset with him like why are you late why are you oh we're gonna because he had to be there till 9 15.

[01:04:04] Rob Roy: I'd be there at 9 o'clock. So my third or fourth time I went there, the, the, the drum major guy closed the door and said, and they were doing whatever they were doing and said no. So in the city, they have these, these, these like not bulletproof, they have these tiny windows. Thick glasses, you know, little, little squares.

[01:04:28] Rob Roy: And you look into the room and you see everybody. It's got the, the metal through it, you know, I dunno if you've ever seen it, but they have a glass and there's a metal in the glass and little squares. It's a, basically, it's not a, I mean it is a fire door, but it's actually to protect people in the room.

[01:04:41] Rob Roy: This is like a long time ago. Mm-Hmm. . So I was like beating on the door and he's like, you could beat the door. And he goes like this to me. You're late and then you're done. And so I couldn't tell my mother that. So I pretended like going every week and I would go to Cornelius and I would show up, I would be late all the [01:05:00] time, still late because Cornelius would, would not be on time.

[01:05:04] Rob Roy: So my mom took me to we went to the award ceremony and Cornelius got perfect attendance and most improved. And we're sitting there and my name was never called. At the very end there's like me and two or three other kids. They called us up and they gave us the they gave us a I got a little drummer pin.

[01:05:24] Rob Roy: You know, and then another kid got a little something else. Another kid got something else. The three of us, like the three losers. And my mom, as proud as she was, so embarrassed. I think I got called every name under the, under this creation of ours on the way home about how I was no good and how I was, I let her down and embarrassed her in front of all the people.

[01:05:49] Rob Roy: My mother never came to another event ever, ever. After that with me, she just played football, ran track. She just never came to one of my games. And where it, it, what I realized that it was so painful for me is when I was a homecoming game, my senior year. And they asked everybody, Hey, is, are your parents coming?

[01:06:16] Rob Roy: And I told my mother, say, I got the game. It's homecoming. I'm playing. I'm starting. Can you, are you going to be there? Yeah, I'll be there. I said, okay, are you going to be there? Yes, I'll be there. And my stepfather or whatever he was at the time here. I will, we'll be there. We'll be there. We'll support you.

[01:06:32] Rob Roy: So, we're down there, we do the practice, and everybody's parents, you can see everybody's parents showing up, they're all nice, they give the moms a flower, and and the dads get a little pen, you know, they're all, the parents are all lined up, and we're numbered 1 through 90 or whatever it was, and I was in the middle because I was playing the line.

[01:06:47] Rob Roy: And then DJ, DJ is a friend of mine. His parents were there as well. And they're like, are your parents showing up? And I said, yeah, cause I called them my parents. Cause my mother's boyfriend. So they're calling out the, you know, the quarterback one, but the kicker one, blah, blah, blah. His parents are so in the back and then they go through all the people and I'm sitting there and I'm like, you know, this is the time where there's no pagers or cell phones.

[01:07:16] Rob Roy: So either you're there or you're not. Either you're, and I'm thinking they must, compensating again, they must've got lost. They couldn't find parking. They were, they're not here yet. They're going to, they're going to be here. I'm 15 or 16 years old and I'm having a freaking panic attack because I'm going to walk out there on a football field by myself in front of the entire school and the, and the, and the, you know, the, the other team, I'm going to be the guy that's going to walk out there.

[01:07:45] Rob Roy: By myself. And so I told one of the coaches, I said, if you see my mom and dad, you know, can you, can you, cause I was calling them my dad when I wasn't with him. I'm like my dad. And that's how much I needed that. I needed to be like everybody else. I needed to have a mother and father. So you'll know my mom, she said, my dad looks like this.

[01:08:05] Rob Roy: They're like, yeah, we see him. We'll make sure to get down there. We'll we'll they're in a parking lot looking for them. And they're like, cause they're not here yet. And they're like, well, do you know what kind of car? I'm like, this is the kind of car they drive. They don't want me to walk out there by myself either, but I'm starting.

[01:08:18] Rob Roy: So I have to walk. I can't, if I was like on the bench or something, I could have probably pulled it off, right? But I was a starter. Man, memories. They never showed up. They fucking never showed up. Yeah. So DJ's parents they were they knew that they weren't going to show up. And just before they called my name, they walked up to me on both of my arms and said, Hey, we, we got you.

[01:08:48] Rob Roy: We're going to walk out with you. And I think I cried from the, the from the end zone, all the way to the 50 yard line. I was devastated. I don't know if I was crying because they were there or crying because my, cause they were there or because my you know, my parents weren't there. I don't know. I can tell you today.

[01:09:07] Rob Roy: I just know is super emotional for me. Yeah. I was so, and then I was like, you know, I can't rely on anybody. I mean, the mindset is DJ's parents are great, but they're not my parents. They need to be there for me. They need to be, You know, they, I don't know, man, I was going through so much back then, but I

[01:09:33] Rob Roy: when I went to bootcamp, I'm not changing the stories because of that, but that those two things go to, those three things go together. When I went to bootcamp again, I was telling my mother, I said, Hey, I'm going to graduate bootcamp. I'm in California. It's the first time I've been to California. First time I was on an airplane, you know right after I graduated high school, I was gone within probably 30 days from my 18th birthday.

[01:09:57] Rob Roy: I wanted to be in the military, in the Navy.[01:10:00] 

[01:10:02] Rob Roy: I go there and I have such resilience from all these things that happened to me. Like, all these things that have happened in my past made me strong. I was in boot camp. I had no problem. It was, I was like this warrior that could withtake whatever they were throwing at me and then throw it back. I was 18 years old and I was running my company of 80 guys.

[01:10:31] Rob Roy: It's a natural, in my opinion, natural leader. And the only reason I wasn't the R pod, this R pod and the a PA, I was running the company, but they had this old guy with me because he felt rejected if, if some 18-year-old punk was gonna be the one running the company. But I had zero hits, I had zero problems.

[01:10:51] Rob Roy: I was always perfect. I was perfect. I was in my element there. It was perfect. 'cause it was based on your, what you could provide. Right? Not your, not your past, not your, not your family. It's like, what are you doing for this team? It's 80 people. And then the guys were, because I was used to being by myself.

[01:11:15] Rob Roy: So I didn't have alliances. Even though I went to bootcamp with a friend of mine, I didn't have alliances because I wasn't used to it. So I was like, no, we're going to get this done. And I don't have to worry about what you think of me, because I've had better people think worse of me. So I was, I was, I was, I was getting shit done.

[01:11:33] Rob Roy: I was the honor man of my boot camp company. Yeah, it was number one in my boot camp company, my division. It's a high honor. Yeah, it is, it was. Except for I celebrated by myself because, as usual, no one, nobody fucking showed up. I was out there by myself, you know you know, Steven Rob Roy, you know, and he's receiving the honor of blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

[01:12:03] Rob Roy: The big plaque and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, Rob Roy. And I was like, so I was that kid back on the 50 yard line in the end zone again. Nobody's there. They had a dinner that night where, you know, the Otterman came for the division and there's all these people with their parents and I was there by myself.

[01:12:25] Rob Roy: It was, it was, it's, it's, I mean, it's still a traumatic event for me. And I say that because a friend of mine in boot camp, who's a, who's a basic R RDC, which is what they call them now, the guys that run the boot camp companies, I went back to Great Lakes probably like five years ago. And he says, there's a graduation.

[01:12:45] Rob Roy: You want to come to the graduation? I said, yeah, I'll come to graduation. And I was, and I was sitting there and I was like, Oh, I was sitting in. I was, I was telling him, I said, you know, this is fucking hard. He's what I go. I remember being here by myself. It's one of these kids being alone when the parents didn't show up.

[01:13:06] Rob Roy: I go, I'm, I'm feeling like. The kid, and I could see it. He goes, and this guy was like, yeah, I feel it too. I was like, what? And he goes, yeah, my parents weren't here for me. He goes, I get emotional every time I do this. Cause I go back to my parents, went there for me. I think, man, this is, I'm not going to hug you, but this is a moment.

[01:13:25] Rob Roy: I was like, yeah. So we just both got there. Like, you know, warriors, like, yeah, we understand each other. We understand what it takes. He's a chief now and that's good. But. You know, I went through my, my first four years, my first four years in the Navy, I saw people dying. The USS Nimitz I was on had a fire and I saw people, you know, mangled explosions.

[01:13:48] Rob Roy: It's my first real exposure to war combat. And this was just an accident. You can look it up. It's a USS Nimitz fire on board the ship. You know, because of they say, because of drug use not drug use, but what do you call it? Pilot had taken some antihistamines or whatever, but he missed, he missed his mark and crashed a bunch of planes.

[01:14:09] Rob Roy: And they were doing OREs, which is operational readiness exercise. And the huge fireball on the ship, explosions. We were up all night trying to put out the fires. And I was, I think I was like 19. Fucking, and I had seen the movie before, seen the movie about the forest forestall, which is another carrier, aircraft carrier where the wooden decks and a bomb, it went off and caused a bunch of fire.

[01:14:33] Rob Roy: It's like a movie they train you on and I can see the deck swaying when I was came out of the birthing depart. At birth departments where you sleep and trained, you know, this is what we do in a fire. This is what we do. It's an emergency. This is your battle station. They train you on all that stuff when you're in there.

[01:14:50] Rob Roy: And I responded. I mean, there's a longer story behind why I did that, but I don't want to hold the audience up on it. But we got our evening prayer. Cause you get evening prayer on the [01:15:00] ship every night. They do at 10 o'clock at night. And this particular night the military, everybody in the military knows that let us pray means bow your head and then they give a prayer.

[01:15:08] Rob Roy: All right, it's a prayer for the soldiers, those who were and are alive, past, and it's a probably 15 minute prayer by the pastor or the chaplain, they call them in the Navy. They could be any denomination, but they give a prayer every night. It's called Let Us Pray, and then everything kind of stops and you bow your head and then you say a prayer to yourself, pray a prayer to your teammates, a prayer for the ship, because you're in a, you're basically in a combat situation.

[01:15:36] Rob Roy: This particular night, prayer normally goes at 10, at 9. 55, 10 o'clock. This, whether we're air ops or not, right? This, we're doing an ORE, so we were in the middle of a, what they call a battle stations. So it doesn't come to a battle station because we're, We're at battle. But battle stations ended at probably like 1030 and then at 1155, I think that's when he came on.

[01:15:56] Rob Roy: And the reason I remember, cause the lights were still on and we were still in battle dress and he goes, let us pray. I was in my rack and I remember bowing my head and it's like, let us, whatever, whatever he was saying, and then I'm in, then the lights go out, right. Does it doesn't go to dark, but the lights didn't go to taps and they play taps and then all the lights, you know, they go from, they go from white lights to red lights and then you're in your evening watches and stuff.

[01:16:20] Rob Roy: But when we're doing an RE, you can still hear the, you know, the planes taking off and landing. It was landing and taking off. About 1130, you hear an explosion, like a, it rocks. It's a metal ship, so you can feel the ripples through the ship. Everybody kind of wakes up, or at least I can say they already woke up, because you hear the, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, battle stations, battle stations, fire on the deck, and all this stuff, and you automatically know where you're supposed to go, because you've been training at it.

[01:16:50] Rob Roy: But And I remember leaving, as you're leaving, they're locking down the hatch so the ship doesn't sink. You know, they go to Circle Zebra, and it's like, they're circling these, these little things are, circle Zebra, Circle Williams, oh, these are different things they do with the ship so the ship doesn't sink.

[01:17:02] Rob Roy: I walk out the door and the hatch closes behind me. I'm like, you know, just something you notice. Like, I just closed the hatch as you're running up to your battle station. As I'm running up to the battle station, there's bodies on stretchers. There are people, let me change that. There are people carrying people on stretchers that are going back to the casualty elevator.

[01:17:21] Rob Roy: So there's four elevators. There's one up on the floor of the of the tower. And there's one behind it and there's one on the left side. And there's one on the right side, one, two, three, four. And the the third one was just behind it. The superstructure is what they call a casualty elevator with all the dead people.

[01:17:38] Rob Roy: That's where they're going to go. Right. So as I'm running back, they're running back to that elevator. And they're running back to the other elevator where they're in the medical. They're running back to the calcium. So these are people that I'm running by and they're just, you know, decapitated because when the plane came by, it ripped off the heads of people.

[01:17:54] Rob Roy: A couple of people that are sitting on these, they're called tractors. And it was low enough that it could just, it just whacked or guillotined it. Cause it wasn't on the, cause people sit on the foul line. The foul line is the, where the wing you can't go beyond the foul line. It's foreign object damage.

[01:18:09] Rob Roy: So. People are sitting, sitting there standing, because that's where he's standing. Because when the plane lands, they chalk it, put wheel, they put chalks on it, and then they put the tow truck on it, and they pull it out of the way so the next plane can land. You got less than a minute and a half to do that.

[01:18:21] Rob Roy: That's how the planes get to their parking station. So you have people that are driving with tractors on board this carrier, pulling planes into their positions, and then there's planes that are landing. It's super busy. It's crazy busy up there. It's nighttime. So there's a fire going off on the bow.

[01:18:38] Rob Roy: There's people been carrying dead people back and then it looks like, like an old Batman movie where everything's at an angle and I go, I start running and I'm looking and then I see a hose team go down and hear explosion and see a flash and I see a hose team down, go down. And what that means is that explosion killed or injured all those people on their hose team, right?

[01:19:00] Rob Roy: It's a fire hose. So now the hose is, you know, full of pressure, just bouncing around so they can get it turned off so we can get more people on the hose. It isn't like we need to stop Get that hold under control. It's get the hold under control and put out the fire, right? It's doing damage because it's banging all over the thing.

[01:19:19] Rob Roy: Turn the water off, get guys back on hold, you got to get the fire out. The fire is the most important thing you do. Fire is bad on a ship, really bad on a submarine, really bad out in space, but fire bad on ship. That's because there's, because there's bombs and everything else on board there. So we go up there and we fight that thing all night long, all night long.

[01:19:38] Rob Roy: And then you got to cool off all the missiles because of the heat. So you're just waiting for one of those things to cook off. Imagine standing there and you've got a guy with his hand on it. You're going, it's still hot. And you're like, this thing's going to wipe all of us out. It's going to blow a hole in the deck.

[01:19:56] Rob Roy: Cause cause one of those Phoenix has already blew a hole in the deck. So all the [01:20:00] water we're spraying is just going, it's pouring inside the ship. The ship's taking on water while it's trying to get to a place where you help put out the fire. This is like just fucking madness. I was out there all night.

[01:20:09] David Pasqualone: Yeah. And I can only imagine because. There's a balance too. If you cool something too fast, there's cracks. And if you crack a bomb, it can explode. If you don't cool it down fast enough, it can explode. No stress or pressure there, right? Did you use your timeout card? No, 

[01:20:23] Rob Roy: no, I didn't whip out my timeout card.

[01:20:25] Rob Roy: Yeah. Don't get too stressed out. No. Yeah. No, 

[01:20:28] David Pasqualone: seriously, we're joking about that, but ladies and gentlemen, this is why men need to be men and people need to be strong. Men or women, because our military is not what it was 20 years ago, 40 years ago, certainly not 50 years ago. And we are setting our soldiers up for failure and long term trauma and endangering our country.

[01:20:47] David Pasqualone: So if you're voting in America and you're supporting these liberal woke idiots who are pulling out timeout cards for bootcamp, there's no timeout in war. Rob, continuing your story, I just did want to point that out. 

[01:21:01] Rob Roy: I'll give you a better example of that, yours is cold. When they, when the terrorists blew the ship up, when they put them on the, the, the the teams were not functioning the way they were supposed to.

[01:21:13] Rob Roy: In that, they're called damage control teams and not to say anything bad or good about them, but they blew a hole in that ship, damn near sank. It damn near sank because of, let's just say that I don't think things went the way they were supposed to. 

[01:21:30] David Pasqualone: Yeah, and the fact is, I mean, you can disagree with me, but I think they should No, I don't.

[01:21:35] David Pasqualone: No, no, I'm saying, this is the statement I'm going to make. I personally think boot camp should be brutal. If you can't make it through bootcamp, you don't want to go to war, you, you shouldn't. You know what I mean? So wising people. Yeah. Oh, in bootcamp is setting this all up for failure at war? 

[01:21:55] Rob Roy: Well, they lowered the ASVAB scores.

[01:21:58] Rob Roy: The ASVAB scores, the armed forces bat battery test basically, basically tells you what you, it's, it's the SAT for the military. Yeah, I know it has. They'll tell you Yeah. What, what, what did they do with the scores? I didn't know that. Well, they, that determines your job. Like, there's like 10 indicators that said, okay, you can be a crypto tech, you can be a crypto tech, or you can be a boast inmate, right?

[01:22:20] Rob Roy: And every other job in between, those are the two top ones, top and the bottom one. And so depending on how high you score, you're going to get the better job. How low you score, you're going to get the worst job. But there's a minimum, there's a minimum because a non designated comes in at a 25. Non designated, they don't have a job, they can come in, they can figure out when they get in the Navy, right?

[01:22:40] Rob Roy: They're basically, you're in the Navy, you barely made it, but you can figure out what you're going to do and have a successful career. So the government, our government, in the last couple years said that they were dropping it down to 10. Ten. The last time I did something like that was in World War II, I think.

[01:22:57] Rob Roy: And then there was, there was more of a problem trying to, you got people, at that point, you got people that can't tie their shoes. Don't know their left and right. Not insulting anybody, but that person doesn't know their left from their right, and that person does not know right over left, and that person's never going to follow the directions you want them because they can't understand it.

[01:23:14] Rob Roy: There's a limitation to what a person with a 10 ASVAB has. I'm not saying they're stupid. I'm just saying that there's a limitation in the knowledge you can give them. And we see that with all the incidents that have happened recently in the Navy, where they just went back and said, well, okay, it's going to be 25.

[01:23:31] Rob Roy: It should be like 60. If you want to have the best fighting force in the world, the ASVAB should be 60. You're going to have smarter people, but people will say, well, they're not going to stay as long. Well, you have to challenge people. You have to do your job if they're, if they're, if they have a 60 as value, because the average seal is 55.

[01:23:47] Rob Roy: I think it's 50, maybe 60 now, but it's 50. But if you're going to be a nuke, it's like 90. 

[01:23:54] David Pasqualone: Yep. I don't want to go into deep. We got a lot more of your story. We're going to pick up where The boat and the chaos and the fires we're going to pick up there. But I love God and I love America and I have the utmost respect for all the men and women who serve and the way our government is just not just watering down, but purposely destroying from the inside out our, our armed forces.

[01:24:21] David Pasqualone: I know a Navy SEAL. You know, it's not easy to become a Navy SEAL. Like, you know, Robin, you can talk about it's not easy to do the things you're asked to do, but he recently left because he says all they want are 18 year olds with no soul. that will just kill anybody anytime for any reason. They're not looking for anybody to have a brain.

[01:24:46] David Pasqualone: They just almost want a robot to control. Is that what you're seeing too now under this administration? You mean the military or SEALs? Well, military in general, but he was a Navy SEAL and he stepped down because he [01:25:00] said it's just got so bad. 

[01:25:02] Rob Roy: I could see that. Because you're, because what you're doing is you're, so just for, just for a minute when the Navy used to, when I came in, the Navy would only take people that won't say majority of people, they would only take if they were already in the military.

[01:25:16] Rob Roy: Right. So they would, you would join the Navy. And then you, then you would apply for the program. It means you already had some experience, a little bit older, and you did well. So if you're 22 years old and you can do 100 push ups and 100 sit ups and do 10 pull ups, then you're, no one's ever failed doing that.

[01:25:33] Rob Roy: But you know what else? No one's ever graduated doing less than six pull ups. No one ever graduated that does less than 100 sit ups. No one ever graduated less than push ups, pull ups, and sit ups. Yeah, no one's ever graduated with those, with lower numbers than that. So you're not going to get a guy, if he does six pull ups, he's not going to graduate.

[01:25:50] Rob Roy: Because all the failures have that in common. Now, will a guy fail that, that can do 50 pull ups? Of course he can. Yeah, but no one graduated with six pull ups. And that's what you're looking for. The Navy came back with Yeah, we don't want to do that anymore. We want, we want to recruit more people into the SEAL teams.

[01:26:09] Rob Roy: So we're going to offer them a contract. It's called a, uh, It's a SEAL, it's a SEAL contract. It's a diver contract. Basically diver, EOD, SEAL, SWCC. Sour Swimmer. These are different specific kind of, kind of like what the army does with parares with airborne. Everybody can be airborne if they sign a contract.

[01:26:31] Rob Roy: And so what you're not getting is you're not getting the best qualified people. You're getting a person that meets the requirements of the contract. This is what he's talking about, the soul thing. So I can train to the numbers and they can't hold it against me because the minimum number to get to buds is six for pull ups.

[01:26:47] Rob Roy: It's 42 for sit ups and I think it's 50 push ups and then like a, I think I'm gonna say a 735 run. I don't know exactly what it is, but 1130 in the swim. If you're not cranking nine or below or eight below in the swim, you shouldn't even fucking try out. Because the seals are in the water. But the way the contract works.

[01:27:09] Rob Roy: Is that no, no, this is all they have to do. It's a minimum requirements. And then some jackass says we'll train them from there. Do you, you're not the, the, the chasm is so large to, to get a person that doesn't, that can't swim and to be an effective warrior. Cause you're not, you're talking about physical ability.

[01:27:27] Rob Roy: You're not even getting into the mental acuity and, and the differences in that. And the warrior mindset, you haven't gotten to that. You're just talking about. Can you do this? This, this minimum number of people, the Navy gets a people, they get, they get, I think they give 1, 100 contracts out a year, 1, 100.

[01:27:43] Rob Roy: And it may be more than that, but of that 1, 100, how many of those guys are going to make, you're not going to get 1, 100 seals. You may get 150, maybe get 200, maybe get 220. Because when the SEAL class classes up, and you should see it, it is, it is a sight to see. Two, three hundred kids, standing on the side of the road with the little helmet, they don't have the helmets on yet, standing there, and you go, 16, 20 maybe, out of that, two, three hundred people.

[01:28:12] Rob Roy: Because only the 16 of that number is actually qualified to be there. They should be there, you know? And people are like, well, you know, they only, they only recruit white people. No, they recruit people that are qualified, that meet the minimum qualifications. This isn't a DEI thing. What are the qualifications for going into the program?

[01:28:31] Rob Roy: These are the qualifications to go into the program. Do you meet those? No, I don't. Well, the case is not a DEI issue. Because it's so low, in my opinion, it's so low, the bar is so low to get in. Anybody can do it, but whether or not you're willing to do it is completely different. Whether you're not to put the hard work and drive into it.

[01:28:49] Rob Roy: He's right that your friend is that they watered it down. So of those numbers, how many people do you to graduate? You may get 16 or 20 of them through Hell Week. And then it's a matter of what the attrition is after Hell Week. It's less than that. So maybe you get 10. Out of that 150, 200 people that make it through Hell Week and then they have people that have been enrolled back because of injuries and that class goes back up to maybe 25 or 30 because they're putting in the people that injured from Hell Week or injured at other times in training that they keep them there for and now you get a class that's a mixture of the original 10 plus like 10 or 15 other people that have been waiting for this class to start up.

[01:29:24] Rob Roy: In my opinion, because I'm a Nobel Hell Week, and we'll get into that later, but that means nobody fucking quit. And we're 28 in, 28 out. Problem with that is, is that people don't

[01:29:42] Rob Roy: It's six months, right? The first part of BUDS is six months. And if you take ten months to get through it, or twelve months to get through it, or another year and a half to get through it because you're injured, I get that, but it's still a six month program. And whether you're physically ready to do the program is [01:30:00] completely something different.

[01:30:01] Rob Roy: If I did the program every Let's say I do the program every What I mean by that is that I go to BUDS, I get injured first phase. I class up at the next class. So I start with class, I'm going to use my numbers. So I start with class 145. I get injured. 146 goes by me and then 147 starts. So that's two classes now.

[01:30:29] Rob Roy: I was, I started 1 45, now I'm in 1 47 and I go through first phase at 1 45 and I get injured in at the end of first phase, and I go to 1 47 when they come. Now there's like 10 weeks between 1 45 and 1 47, but I'm gonna roll in 1 47. Now I'm going, I'm gonna finish up the end of first phase and then I'm gonna go to second phase.

[01:30:49] Rob Roy: Well, we got, fuck, I got injured again. So now I leave 1 47, and this is a bad injury. Maybe it's a hamstring or whatever, you know. Now I'm gonna be, I'm gonna class up in 1 52. Well, fuck, that's 20 , which, but that's three classes. That's 15 weeks. So now I got 25 weeks. Right. I've got off and then I go to third phase and maybe I make it to third phase, but I still got 25 weeks off that the other guys didn't get, and now they have it.

[01:31:28] Rob Roy: So it's first phase, second phase, third phase, and SQT, which is basically the advanced training. It's all one big loop. So it's not a year anymore. I mean, it's not six months anymore, it's a year. And you get the same thing happening. People get injured, they put 'em back in injured. And I'm not disparaging the program, I'm saying that.

[01:31:46] Rob Roy: You're not getting the best qualified people on day one in order for them to always make it through. And every sale will tell you that the, the attrition rates are great. Everybody loves it. But I will say that if you're running a business and you were having that attrition, then you know, the thing is that you would fucking go out of business.

[01:32:03] Rob Roy: But the government uses it as a tool just like they did Top Gun to tell people they can become SEALs. They can tell their parents and people go, Oh, my son's gonna become a Navy SEAL. And then that kid doesn't fucking make it. And then what happens? Now you're dealing with all these emotional issues with these kids.

[01:32:18] Rob Roy: People have committed suicide. People have gotten injured. People have gotten out of the Navy. You know, they go to a new job and in the Navy, they don't want to do that. And they're a pain in the ass because they don't want to do that. I don't think that the, the, as I say, the The juice isn't worth the squeeze when you got these kids.

[01:32:36] Rob Roy: Yeah, it's not. So you drop the ratings down and then you got this kid you're going to have to, I'm going to have to help him. They're going to hire somebody else to help him. They got a, they got a course right now and I'm not critical of Naval Special Warfare, but when you have a pre course to a pre course, we got a problem.

[01:32:54] Rob Roy: Yeah. When, when we can't get, 

[01:32:56] David Pasqualone: it's like being in engineering and taking remedial math. Right. Exactly. You don't belong there. You need to get yourself ready before you show up. It's not the college's, it's not the Navy's role to get you ready. 

[01:33:10] Rob Roy: Yeah. And that's a problem. The Marine Corps used to have this slogan.

[01:33:13] Rob Roy: What are you doing? I used to do recruiting for spec war and for the Navy. And I remember going to To the Arnold Fitness Classic, which is in an odd place. I think it's in Ohio. It's in a weird place, but he has this thing in the middle of the state where it's called the Arnold Fitness Classic. It's, it's awesome.

[01:33:31] Rob Roy: They bodybuilder, they have everything there, like everything, not just a bodybuilder, they have everything. So I'm in there and the Marines are there and we're, we got our booth, they got their booth. And this guy comes around and goes, what is the Navy going to do for me? And I was like you know, we have a lot of programs, but you know, if you want to become a SEAL, it's completely different than just joining the Navy.

[01:33:53] Rob Roy: So I'm here to talk to kids that want to become a SEAL. And then he was like, well, what are you going to do? I said, well, let's see how many pull ups you can do first. Before I waste my time talking to you, let's see if your kid can do 10 pull ups. If your kid can do 10 pull ups, I'll, I'll talk to him. But if not, he can just talk to me during, he can just join the Navy.

[01:34:09] Rob Roy: Right. It's, I'm not getting my contract. The Navy guys would do that. So I was kind of like, yeah. Oh, go see that guy Pullups. You can do 10 Pullups, you can talk. You can't do pull 10 pullups, 'cause I know you're not gonna make it otherwise. Other was like, I'm gonna go down Marines and I say. Go ahead, right?

[01:34:36] Rob Roy: I don't care. Cause I'm not a recruiter. I'm, I'm more of a brand, brand person for Naval Special Warfare. I'm here to show what SEALs are like. And I remember the Marines, cause they're right next to us saying what are you gonna do for us? 

[01:34:50] David Pasqualone: Yeah. 

[01:34:51] Rob Roy: What are you going to do for us? We let you become a Marine.

[01:34:54] Rob Roy: What are you going to do for us? And they got a pull up bar too. And he asked the guy, [01:35:00] how many pull ups can you do for the Marine Corps? It's, I mean, it's just a complete different approach to getting the best qualified people. Is that, what are you going to do for us? Which is different than what can we do for you?

[01:35:16] Rob Roy: You appreciate things more when you earn them than they are when they're given to you. Actually goes back to that, that, that, that lion. And it goes back, definitely goes back to the, you know, the wolf thing. You earn more when you work for it than you do if it's just given to you. The Marines, in my opinion, for the most part, they're all fucking warriors.

[01:35:37] Rob Roy: They're all, they're all lions, right? The ones I've ever met, the ones I've ever worked with. They're all pretty consistent with being, you know, the brotherhood of making sure they're the best. Now I'm sure there's people in there, air wings that are not like that, but definitely the regular ground pounding guys, they're good to go.

[01:35:52] David Pasqualone: Yeah, so I didn't mean, this was an important topic, but it's probably not, maybe we need to do it in your show. So thanks for exploring that. So let's go back. You're on this ship. There's four elevators. People are going to the wrong elevator and everything's going on around you. Where does your life go from there, Rob?

[01:36:09] David Pasqualone: Oh, 

[01:36:10] Rob Roy: wow. Yeah. So, you know, the thing about awards the ship pulled in to Norfolk and then they dropped Harvest. So back in the day. So they know that people are going to leave. So you couldn't leave the ship till the investigation was done. They wanted to talk to everybody, but they also had to get back out because we had to, I think we were getting ready to go to war or not war, but it was a conflict we're going to.

[01:36:30] Rob Roy: And that's why we're doing the OREs. We had to get underway for the deployment. So they wouldn't let you leave the ship. But so we pulled back in, dumped all the trash off, and then we basically got the engineers on board to fix it. And then we went back out to sea. I don't know how many people were UA, but people would take the, no, no, in the old days, they used to have these phone banks.

[01:36:53] Rob Roy: On the pier, where you would go out and make a phone call on a, you know, what's your, what's your AT& T calling card back to your family or friends and tell them you're okay. The bank of these things, there's like 50 of a hundred of them. that are on the piers when the ships pull in so sailors can get off. This is back in the day where you had to use an AT& T calling card or an MCI card. For the old school guys that remember the MCI card, calling cards.

[01:37:16] Rob Roy: So anyway, that, no cell phones, no text messages, no none of that stuff, no internet intranets. Anyway, so we pulled in and everybody wants to talk to Well, I'll say this is that when the ship pulls and they use to connect the landlines to the ship and you can use the phones inside the ship, but they didn't do that.

[01:37:40] Rob Roy: They just hooked us up to power and these are nuclear carriers, but they would hook us up to power and then they got the crews on board. We were there for probably 18 hours max, but if you want to get off the ship. You have to take trash off. They were like, who are you? What division are you at? What are you doing?

[01:37:55] Rob Roy: Well, you have to take trash off the ship. So if you wanted to get off the ship and make a quick phone call, you would take trash off the ship. So people were creating trash to take it off the ship. Some people put their personal clothes inside the ship and went U. A. Unauthorized, absent. They just, I'm not going back on board the ship because the tragedy of what happened is and seeing the loss of life.

[01:38:19] Rob Roy: It's too hard for some people. But let me say this to be clear. None of them fucking people were up there with me fighting that fire. I don't, I don't know how to say it any other way. Is that, the people that, that left the ship, Were not the people that I saw when I went back out to sea. There were other people that weren't on the, on the flight deck.

[01:38:40] Rob Roy: Remember what I said? They circled, I think it's Circle Zebra, they circle Zebra, the ship, or Circle William, I can't remember which one it is, but they closed all the doors. So there were only like 150 of us up there fighting the fire. Right? Because they got, you have all the, all the pumping stations.

[01:38:55] Rob Roy: You've got all the damage control below decks. You have all the medical personnel. This, the ship is, is, is humming with, you know, with problems. It wasn't just the fires on the deck. There was like, you know, that 150 people, it's like four or five hose teams. And then, you know, 

[01:39:14] David Pasqualone: and so people who aren't familiar.

[01:39:15] David Pasqualone: So they have 

[01:39:15] Rob Roy: perspective ordinance people and you got the missiles that, Oh, great. 

[01:39:21] David Pasqualone: Oh, I'm sorry. There's a delay. There's an internet connection. I apologize, but for people who don't, oh, for people who don't understand how many people are on the ship total. 'cause that's, they have no perspective how big these ships are.

[01:39:35] Rob Roy: Oh, there's 5,000 people on board the ship. 

[01:39:38] David Pasqualone: Yeah. A full compliment 

[01:39:39] Rob Roy: is 5,000. The ones now are like 6,500. 

[01:39:42] David Pasqualone: Yeah. So you're talking about there's, there's 150 

[01:39:44] Rob Roy: of us up there fighting a fire. 

[01:39:45] David Pasqualone: Yeah. So that's only a small majority. It's not even 10%. It's not 5%. You're like one or 2 percent at most are fighting this fire.

[01:39:54] David Pasqualone: So go, I just want to make sure people understand. And these are people I would see it. 

[01:39:58] Rob Roy: Yeah. Oh yeah. And [01:40:00] they're like, well, Rob, how do you know? Cause these are the same people I would see every day. Cause remember your firefighting station or your combat station is going to be the people you see every time you go up there.

[01:40:08] Rob Roy: So if I'm going to be up on a, the one row and on the care or the four row, those are people I would see all the time. You're familiar. You don't want to just. You know, like, Hey, I'm just going to go go to this gunport. You don't do that. You go to where you're supposed to be. So when that fire went off or when it started, you ran to where you saw all the people that you know, that you normally work with, because a good cohesive team works good together.

[01:40:26] Rob Roy: And we were a good host team. So we pulled in, we must've lost, I'd say six, 700 people, but they weren't the people that I was fighting side by side with, there were other people in admin cooks. People that work inside the ship, the barbers, you know, because they have barbers on board this ship. They have, um, CSs, which are culinary specialists, admin people.

[01:40:55] Rob Roy: And I think that's in any war PTSD is not the warriors majority of the time. The PTSD is from the people who are The anxiety and the trauma that they felt and that they feel when they're in combat situations, and this is not a blanket statement for anybody that's suffering from PTSD that's a warrior.

[01:41:11] Rob Roy: It's just to say that a majority of the time that's going to happen to people who are not in a group that's tight, that moves the way we move, or a group that does what we do. Like, you'll have PTSD symptoms, but the people that really have a problem with it is a person that's never been in a combat situation before.

[01:41:29] Rob Roy: It's the, it's the It's not the door gunner. It's a person that they picked up. That's, you know, that's been rescued. That's going to have all the issues or problems. Cause we're trained to understand what we're going through. And so you have your warriors out there fighting. And what you're saying earlier is that you don't have as many of them anymore.

[01:41:45] Rob Roy: So we're going to have a lot more mental health issues are a lot more PTSD than we used to have. I mean, how the, you know, and that name's changed from shell shock to, it's funny that. And not to, not to just dwell on this, but if you look at Shellshock back in World War I and World War II with the guys shaking in their hysterica and they, you know, Patton got in trouble for actually slapping a person that said that he didn't need to be in his military because he was, people were dying while he's sitting in Iraq.

[01:42:13] Rob Roy: And people were like, Oh my God, he slapped a soldier that was under Shellshock, Patton's a warrior. Yeah, he was a straight up fucking hard ass, like we're going to go kick ass and say names and I don't need people in the military that can't do that. And that's when we started seeing this, you know, this reduction and building or making of a warrior.

[01:42:38] Rob Roy: And now we have it now where the majority of people get out of the Navy now wanting to get a hundred percent disability because, or military because they want to become PTSD because they wouldn't have peace. Not true. I'm seeing that there's a lot more people claiming PTSD now because of the way they were, they were raised than there were before.

[01:42:56] Rob Roy: Cause we're not raising lions. We're raising sheep and sheep are afraid of lightning. Sheep are afraid of the bad weather. They huddle. Right? They, they, they don't do what lions do and they don't, they definitely don't do what wolves do. So getting back, so we're getting back to the carrier. A lot of people left and we went out to sea and we completed doing what we're doing.

[01:43:18] Rob Roy: And I don't know what happened to those people. I don't know if they went to court martial or whatever, but we went out to sea and I spent four years on the USS Nimitz. I wouldn't say kicking ass and taking names, but doing whatever they, you know, the government wanted us to do. This puts me in Spain and then I was in Spain for two years.

[01:43:36] Rob Roy: I was going to get out of the Navy and go play football. And I played a lot of sports. I met a lot of people. That's where I realized that I wasn't a good DEI person. The Navy started incorporating women into the military. And I was not, I wasn't, I wasn't used to that. I wasn't used to

[01:43:57] Rob Roy: that at all, but I had my own issues with it. And I, I said before, I, I've treated a lot of women badly because of my own traumas. And I, I think one of the incidents, she's probably not taking orders from women. I just don't know. I don't even know why you're here. I remember telling her that you're like, Oh, that's a dick move.

[01:44:16] Rob Roy: It's like, yeah, but. She doesn't know me. She doesn't know what I've been through. And this is, I was in Spain. But oddly enough, that's, that's where I met a guy that says, you should go to the SEAL teams if you're going to have that attitude. Or, you know, I was working out, I was doing all these other things.

[01:44:32] Rob Roy: And she said, dude, I know SEALs and that you're not a SEAL. And I was like, well, I'm gonna be. It's because now I'm not going to approve your chit. A chit's basically a piece of paper that A sailor puts in requesting to do something different. You can put a chit in to play football, you put a chit in to get married, you put in a chit if you want to move off base, move off housing.

[01:44:53] Rob Roy: This is what these chits are for. They're like request chits. That's what they're actually called. I, she was my division officer. I submitted it to [01:45:00] my chief, which is the senior enlisted person from the division I worked in. She was division officer for the division I worked in. And then it goes up to the XO of the CO.

[01:45:08] Rob Roy: And It was denied, denied. And it went to the XO, the executive officer of the, of the of the squadron I was belonging to when I was in Spain. And he called me into his office and said, and oddly enough, this is a word. I'm just thinking about this stuff out loud. You remember the movie, The Final Countdown?

[01:45:28] Rob Roy: You ever hear of it? 

[01:45:29] David Pasqualone: Yeah, I've heard of it, and I, I mean, that was from the 80s, right? 

[01:45:33] Rob Roy: Right, it was. I'm old, so 

[01:45:36] David Pasqualone: No, you're, I mean, we're not that far off, but So this guy was one of 

[01:45:39] Rob Roy: the 

[01:45:42] David Pasqualone: Go ahead, go ahead. 

[01:45:44] Rob Roy: Yeah, he's one of the officers, he's one of the officers in the movie Final Countdown. The changing of my career, of doing something different, was from the fire, which is why I went to Spain.

[01:45:55] Rob Roy: I was like, I want to get off the ship. I want to do something different. He played in the movie, the, and I'm probably making, I'm making connections that aren't there, but he was one of the executive officers on the carrier plane in the movie. Frog, I think that was his nickname. I won, I think it's one of the pilots on the plane and they're going to, going to attack the Japanese in the movie.

[01:46:16] Rob Roy: And he says, what makes you think you're going to be a Navy SEAL? And I go, I don't know anything about the Navy SEALs. He says, why do you want to go? I said, this is something I think I can do, but you don't know anything about him. I go, no, because that's, I said, somebody who was a Navy SEAL said I could be a Navy SEAL.

[01:46:32] Rob Roy: So I assumed that that's, that was all I need to know. He goes, let me ask you, I'm gonna ask you one question. You just gotta give me a good answer. Or will you, will you quit? And I was like, sir, I've never quit anything before in my life. He said, okay, okay. I will say this guy's name Clark Cummings. Cause he was kind of my mentor.

[01:46:52] Rob Roy: People found out I wanted to become a Navy SEAL. And they're like, Hey, David is a guy. And Clark Cummings. And I can say his name cause he knows this is a true story and that I don't think he would be upset when we saying it. But he was in the hospital bed getting a surgeon, getting a surgeon, finished the surgery.

[01:47:06] Rob Roy: And I come stumbling there, you know, 23, 24 years old. Hey, how's it going? I wasn't like that. I was actually very shy and, and, um, reserved. They're like, there's a Navy SEAL back there. And he, or you need to be careful when you talk to him. I was like, what? Be careful when you talk to him. He's a Navy SEAL.

[01:47:30] Rob Roy: My name is Rob. And some of my friends at work here said I should talk to you about becoming a Navy SEAL. And Clark Cummings filled my head with so much bullshit. I look back at it now. You know. But he was, he gave me the time of day. I had never had that before, where he just sat down and talked to me about what the community was about, not about the physical attributes or, you know, the war stuff they did.

[01:47:57] Rob Roy: It was just like about the community and how, you know, having a bunch of brothers that you ran around with. And I didn't have that, you know, he said, the last thing he said to me was go across the street to this room, a bunch of guys in there that I work with, other SEALs another guy named Don Doherty.

[01:48:16] Rob Roy: I can't remember the other guy's name, but those are the ones that stand out. I go over there and I, they're at the end of the hallway on the right hand side. And I, there's a, there's a last room on the right hand side. And I walked down there thinking that I'm going to be, Oh, they're going to be really receptive of some guys, a black guy, actually walking into their, the little space.

[01:48:38] Rob Roy: So and I didn't think it was about being black. I just thought I was being shy. And, and actually that black didn't have anything to do with it. But I was like, just really, really shy talking to people I didn't know. And people had such high esteems for, and there was no internet. So you couldn't look them up, kids.

[01:48:56] Rob Roy: So I walked back there and I was like, fuck, those guys are big. And I'd go walk by the door, you know, like walk down. So I walked back and I go, Hey, what are you doing? I was like Hey Clark, somebody Cummings. They're like, what are you looking for? I go, no, no, I talked to him and he said, come over here.

[01:49:14] Rob Roy: Why do you want to come over here? He said, he told me that about the SEAL program. So what do you want to know about the SEAL program? I'm like, I don't know anything about the SEAL program. I don't know anything about the SEAL program. He just told me I should talk to you guys. So I went over there and they just basically, they're very open talking about the SEAL program, talking about what, what to expect, what I should do, how to prepare for it.

[01:49:31] Rob Roy: And that there's a failure rate. I didn't understand failure rate. I was like, why would people quit if they signed up for it? They're like, he started laughing at me. Like, yeah, people quit all the time. I'm like, why would they do that? Because people quit for a variety of reasons. I just couldn't fathom people sign up for something.

[01:49:48] Rob Roy: Cause I had my work ethic. Why would you sign up for something? That's the best thing in the world. Just walk away from it. So I left that meeting with a renewed vigor of [01:50:00] I'm going to be a Navy SEAL. So fast forward six weeks later, I'm I got an order that said, Hey, test this guy from the divers called me.

[01:50:08] Rob Roy: I said, Hey, you got to come and take your seal test. I took my seal test. And then I was like, I need to start training for the seal program. So I was like doing seal what I thought seal stuff was, you know, back then. I was like, what do seals do? And there was like no information, but I said, I want to test myself.

[01:50:22] Rob Roy: So I, I went to the pool and I was talking to this guy and I said, well, how, how far is a long swim? And he goes, oh, a mile's a long swim. I'm like, how many laps is that? He goes, it's this amount of laps. Okay. I'm gonna do both of those. I'm gonna do it twice. I think it was like 16 or 20 laps or something like that.

[01:50:38] Rob Roy: I can't remember what it was. Oh, that's what it was. I said, can I swim until you close? That's what he said. That's what I said. It was like three hours. He's like, yeah, you can do whatever you want to do. So I got in the pool and I swam. For three hours straight, right? Just like, I'm not going to quit. I'm not going to quit because I knew the time was clicking the entire time and I want to do my laps on time.

[01:51:01] Rob Roy: So I was, I was, I was pounding, just pounding as good as I could swim. I have no idea how far I swam and I got to the very end. It was like 3 30 or 4 o'clock. The guy goes, hey, we're closing in five minutes. I said, okay, okay. Okay. And then he came back into my laptop. He goes, do you want to swim some more?

[01:51:17] Rob Roy: And then here's the thing. I'd already met my goal. And I remember this when I said I was ready. Cause I said, I said to this guy, if I could swim for another half hour, then I know I'm ready because I'll give you another half hour. I swam for another half hours, almost four hours in the water. And I got out and I didn't know anything about hydration.

[01:51:42] Rob Roy: You know, back then it was like, you know, piss in the pool, you know, whatever. I got out and I felt like my body weighed so much because I was in water the entire time, four hours. I was so dehydrated. I felt like fucking, I was, I felt like such shit. And I was like, I 20 minutes. That's what I was thinking when I got out.

[01:52:02] Rob Roy: I was like, I could swim another 20 minutes. Yeah. I'm, I'm fucking ready. And then after that, I got my orders like three, four weeks later. And I got to Bud's and man, that swim made me ready. Cause I was, I didn't know anything about hydration. I didn't know anything about protein or I dropped like 30 pounds the first couple of weeks I was there.

[01:52:25] Rob Roy: I was running. I didn't run a lot. See, that's the thing. I didn't run. Clark Cummings told me not to run a lot because he goes, you're going to get shin splints before you get there. So don't run a lot. So I was like, okay. So I got to Bud's and I hadn't ran a lot. And our first run was like four miles. And I hadn't ran that far in like a while in soft sand.

[01:52:42] Rob Roy: I got there and I was, my God, man. I, I thought this sucks. But if those guys can make it, I started talking about the instructors. I'm going to make it. I said, whatever they do, I can do. I may not do it as well as they, but I can do what they're doing. Right. Because I said, only thing that got over me is time.

[01:53:04] Rob Roy: And Bobby Richardson told me, the only thing stopping you from getting that, the only thing that's how do you put it? The only thing that's key that that's going to get you dropped in this program is your fucking run. That's what he said to me. I'm like, who y'all instructor Richardson. But I knew at that time I wasn't going to quit.

[01:53:23] Rob Roy: Like you, you can't make me quit. Like I told, I told some instructor, why are you even here? I said, I'm not here for you. I'm here for me. This isn't about you and me, this is about me. So whatever you tell me, it's great. But I know that there's a, there's an expiration date on you till I go to the next phase.

[01:53:41] Rob Roy: So, you can say what you want to me. Cause everyday that I, everyday you talk to me is one day less I have to talk to you. And listen to you. And I, I tell you the most brutal, the brutal instructors on me with the other Black, Black instructors. They're like, we don't want something like that, go ahead. Go ahead.

[01:54:00] Rob Roy: So, you're gonna, you're gonna, you're gonna earn this shit. And yeah, they were like, you're gonna earn it. Keith Willard, he's the stuntman of an LA. He was like, you're gonna earn this shit because you're not gonna bring us down. I was like, who's we? Because I don't see any other black seals around me.

[01:54:19] Rob Roy: Who's we? And he would be like, he was one of the funniest instructors. But every time he saw me, he would drop me down. I'll tell you a quick story. And I don't want people to stop me on the street because I'll punch you in the face. But Keith O'Leary used to tell me, he wanted me to build self respect for myself.

[01:54:34] Rob Roy: So he would say in his own way, he would say Hey boy. Which is considered a derogatory turn by black men. He would go, Hey, boy. And he would say, when you, when you hear that, I want you to say, you must mean Roy, because my last name is Roy. So for years, years, hey boy, you must mean Roy. And then, and even, even when I was in LA doing [01:55:00] movies, he had some stunt guy come up to me out of the blue and I was fucking punched a guy.

[01:55:04] Rob Roy: He goes, Hey boy. And I was like, what? And he goes. Oh, I talked to Keith Fuller and I go, Oh, he wants me to say, you must mean Roy. But I appreciate him. Dave Noble Cherry. There's a bunch of guys that I knew that were they didn't hold me to a higher standard. They made me hold myself to a higher standard.

[01:55:23] Rob Roy: They made me realize that you're not there for anybody else, but yourself. And no one's going to give you a hands up because if you look at it, If someone said, yeah, the Black Seals all stick together. So I'm going to help a brother out. But I'm not appreciated by the community by somebody helping me out.

[01:55:46] Rob Roy: I'm appreciated by the community to go through the same trials and tribulations they go through. What those guys did was made sure I got that. And some. If you're not going to quit, it doesn't matter what we do to you. That's the mindset. If you're not going to quit, it doesn't matter what we do to you, no matter what we say to you.

[01:56:04] Rob Roy: And people quit all the time because of what they're, what's said to them. What do they think is derogatory? They said something about my mother. Are you here for your mother? Do you think it's real? If, if, if this guy, who's your friend is going to be your teammate in the future saying X, Y, Z to you, what do you think the enemy is going to say to you?

[01:56:20] Rob Roy: Are you going to get upset? Are you going to get upset? Are you going to be like, well, it can't be. They said, no, you need to like, put that shit aside and do your job. Yeah. But they said there's a whole lot more things to be said to you, which is why if you don't have, if you have a really cushy life, you're not going to make it through the program.

[01:56:40] Rob Roy: It's you, you can, I want to be a Navy SEAL. Once is not your passion to be a Navy SEAL, but you got to have the character. You got to have the drive. You got to have the ambition to want to be the best that you can be. The SEALs are, I'd say the one group of people that you're, you're the sum of you is, I should say the way to sum you up is You know, people, yeah, they do extraordinary things when no one's looking and they do extraordinary things because they believe in service and they do extraordinary things because they have the shield of God protecting them.

[01:57:13] Rob Roy: But more importantly, they do what they do because they can, right? You, you don't have a lot of people that can do the SEAL teams. And, and quite frankly when I talk to people and they're like, well, your SEALs are like this. And I said, yeah, you don't know the SEALs cause you're not one, but we never compare ourselves to anybody else.

[01:57:32] Rob Roy: Everybody compares themselves to SEALs. And every movie they like to throw in there, SEAL Team 6 this, SEAL Team 6 that. It's like they want to throw it in there because they want that brand to be part of who they are. And then they destroy it because then they put in people who would never make it through the SEAL program.

[01:57:49] Rob Roy: You know, like the G. I. Jain movie. You know, it's just like, that would never happen. That would never It just wouldn't happen, right? There's too much respect for people who go through the program for them to be like, well, let's rape this chick. Like, she's the most important thing that's there. She's not, right?

[01:58:09] Rob Roy: The program itself will weed out people who shouldn't be there. And you can't carry your buddy. Your buddy can't carry you. It's individual effort within a group environment. And you got to be successful because your team needs to be successful. But Budge was difficult. Budge was hard. Everything that happened to me up until that point, was based on my resilience from everything that happened to me before that.

[01:58:34] Rob Roy: All the SEAL teams did for me, I shouldn't say all they did for me, but all the things that happened to me before that helped me make it through the program. Now I will say that I would have made it through without any of the trauma, could have done without any of the trauma. You know, I'm gonna, I'm gonna use a God thing for this, is that maybe that wasn't my path.

[01:58:59] Rob Roy: The decisions I made were because of the decisions I made at the time. Would I have made other decisions? I don't know. But whatever I went through right now, to get to where I am now, I would go through it again because it's important to be who I am now. You start questioning your past and what you should have, could have, would have done, then your kids aren't your kids.

[01:59:17] Rob Roy: Your grandkids aren't your kids. You wouldn't have got your degree. You wouldn't have built your own business. You wouldn't have, you know, you wouldn't have, you wouldn't have affected so many people's lives. I think a lot of people, and I'll say this, the truth was, How many people, what's your legacy? How many people's lives have you affected?

[01:59:34] Rob Roy: How many people have you put, have you, on this earth, have you helped become the, the, the, be the person they should be or want to be? Whereas opposed to, you know, I helped that guy out. I don't do that. I, I fucking go all in and helping somebody be who they want to be. And I think that's important. I think as, as, as As other wolves and other lions, you're showing them how to hunt.[02:00:00] 

[02:00:00] Rob Roy: Not because they're hungry. I mean, because they're hungry, not because they just want to eat. If you get a guy that just wants to eat, that's just like a person wants to become a seal just so he can use it in his resume. That's a person that wants to eat. You want a person that wants to go to war and be the best he can possibly be and will do anything for that.

[02:00:18] Rob Roy: That's a person that's hungry. That's the person that you want on your team because they're always going to be there for you in the end. As opposed to somebody who just wants to cavalry go through this stuff. And that's what I try to do when I work with people. Yeah. 

[02:00:35] David Pasqualone: Yeah. So now you have all this life.

[02:00:42] David Pasqualone: And you're seeing it now translate into success. 

[02:00:46] Rob Roy: Yeah. Oh, yeah. 

[02:00:47] David Pasqualone: You're seeing it, not success in the sense of it's success. But what I'm saying is it's not like for other people to judge. It's inside, you know, you are. Well, 

[02:00:57] Rob Roy: yeah, it's intrinsic. It's intrinsic, not extrinsic. 

[02:01:00] David Pasqualone: Yes. It's fulfilling. And it's like, what's, there's so many words, but like the emotion I can feel, but it's.

[02:01:07] David Pasqualone: You're proving your worth. It's like watching Rocky. He went, he went 15 rounds with Apollo Creed. I have worth, right? And, and now you're at that point in life. Bring us from there to today, Rob. 

[02:01:22] Rob Roy: So I did 20 years, 25 years. And I was, I, I started a company, leadership training company, My first one that I wanted to give back.

[02:01:33] Rob Roy: I ran recruiting. I had a company that trained people to go to the SEAL program because I wanted to give back. I wanted to find my replacements. And so I spent a lot of time with kids and then most recently and I say kids, I mean like 18, 19 year olds, instead of figure out what they want to do with their lives and training for the SEAL program where I'm at now.

[02:01:52] Rob Roy: So I worked with VBSS visit board search and seizure, where I teach a lower level of the SEAL skills. You know, I did time at SEAL team six. We're going to talk about that. It could be done another day. But my 10 years at Seal Team six was was, was great. But, and again, we don't, I know we don't have a lot of time for that, but I'll just go to this other stuff.

[02:02:08] David Pasqualone: Yeah. And just you, before you go on, Rob, I don't want you to rush your life. I don't want you to stretch it out. No, no, no. It just, but we can always pick up in another part. So let's hit the core of, especially if again.

[02:02:24] David Pasqualone: Capturing the mentality to get things done despite what people say to you. Right. Overcoming, you know, the molestation and getting rid of those demons. The thing that you really struggle with from, you know, there to here today. 

[02:02:37] Rob Roy: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. So the Steel Team 6 thing won't even, it, the, because I was a product of my environment then.

[02:02:43] Rob Roy: I was institutionalized making things happen over, over there for 10 years. Great time. Love to talk about it. But the things that have made me who I am now or what I did after that. My ability to understand who I was, you know, you go through when you leave the SEAL team, you go through a bit of a withdrawal because everybody around you is trying to be the best they can be.

[02:03:04] Rob Roy: When you get out in the real world, yeah, that's not true. You can't say the stuff you want to say. No one gets your joke. No one gets to humor. So I was lost. For a number of years, I'd say I didn't do drugs and I wasn't an alcoholic or anything like that. I didn't, I didn't have a vice or what they call, I didn't have a coping mechanism was me understanding what I could do as opposed to, let me lean on these drugs or let me lean on this alcohol.

[02:03:29] Rob Roy: Let me get drunk in the middle of the street. Let me get a DWI. Let me do it. That wasn't it. It was like, what am I going to do next? How am I going to get from where I am now to where I want to be? What's the plan for me? God said there's a plan for me. What, what the hell is this plan supposed to be? Well, the plan is to make a decision.

[02:03:44] Rob Roy: You can't sit there and leave the tea leaves. So I'm looking at my life going, well, what I do is help people. So what do I, what do I want to do now? I want to help people. Well, how do I do that? Just fucking build something. Right? I, I can't tell you. I used to do yoga. in the park and had people show up and that's how I built my business.

[02:04:11] Rob Roy: And some guy goes, Hey, you ever do this program? I go, yeah. And that's how I got Sony PlayStation. That's why I was I was um, I was in, I was in a room and I was talking to somebody and they're like, Hey, what do you think about this video game? I go, video games are stupid. No, we'll never, we'll never hire a person to do it, become a CEO that played a video game.

[02:04:30] Rob Roy: This is back when PlayStation first started. They got strong thumbs. That's it. And then I got involved in the project and realized that we could recruit people from the video games. And I became the poster boy for Sony PlayStation for 10 years. Socom 1, Socom 2, Socom 3, Socom 4, all the commercials for like 10 years.

[02:04:47] Rob Roy: It's fantastic. Then I did the, the Navy commercials to recruit people into the pro, into the SEAL program as well. When I got out the Navy, I had been working up in la I did a bunch of movies. One of 'em, [02:05:00] I started my own. This stuff that I was able to do because I was who I was, I was a force to be reckoned with.

[02:05:05] Rob Roy: These things just fell into my life. When I say fell into my life, like I met this person, met that person, and they say, Hey, we wanna do this with you. Great. But all that stuff at the very end. Allowed me to start this company I have now, which is tried and coaching consulting. And what we do, what we've have done in the past was we put people, we put the let me back up for a second starting in the park doing yoga and not wondering what's going to happen next, but doing the best job I could be was where I started.

[02:05:46] Rob Roy: This part of my life, this part of my life has been super rewarding. Because when I work with the VBSS teams, visit board search and seizure for the Navy, because I would work with young people, like 18, 19 years old, see where they're at and just get them motivated to teach them leadership skills, teach them how to communicate with one another, teach them to know who, who they are.

[02:06:08] Rob Roy: These are added value to me being an instructor. And then seeing where they, you know, going overseas and doing missions. And, and then I would say, if you don't know what you're doing, listen to my voice inside your head, you know, telling you to make, to do something and know where I am, know where you're going and what are you going to do next?

[02:06:30] Rob Roy: Take the fight to the enemy. You know, those little slogans people use those, um, what are they called? I can't think of the word for it now, but those little things. I, a friend of mine, Doug Phillips, I can mention his name, a great friend of mine. I was like, you need to do something that's going to help you in your, in your out years, right?

[02:06:55] Rob Roy: You're a very good read of people. You always want to help people. I think that you should become a psychologist. I was like, what? I got to high school education. And I said, I know, man, I'm not going to do that. That's stupid. I I don't, I, I had a hard enough time in school. Cause I went back, you know, my trauma from being told that wasn't my work.

[02:07:18] Rob Roy: That's all I could think about. He says, no, man, just go. You're older now. You're more wiser. You understand what's going on. You're going to do really well. So I got my bachelor's in psychology. And then I was like,

[02:07:34] Rob Roy: What am I going to do with this? And I, and this is going to sound really bad, but I was looking around at all the people that have bachelors in psychology and said, Well, I'm not going to stop on this floor because I can do more. So I went from, I'm in my master's program right now for a psychology. I got like three months left before I get my Certificate to be an MFT, which is a It's a marriage family therapy, but also the LCCP, which is licensed clinical psychologist.

[02:07:59] Rob Roy: And now I'm thinking about, you know, I don't like this floor either. I may go for my PhD after this. And what that, what that is, is that's my continually drive to one, help people. And two, that knowing my value is what I think my value is and not what other people think my value is. I don't think a person with a high school education, I graduated in 1980.

[02:08:22] Rob Roy: And I went back to school in 2017, 2017, before COVID. I graduated in 1980. That's a lifetime for people. And there's nothing. And if you look at, and I'll say it this way, because my friends will say it this way, it's like God's glory, right? So, and I don't, I'm a, I'm Christian and I'm religious, but I'm not like, Oh, I'm Christian and religious.

[02:08:53] Rob Roy: But I understand it that I don't know, would I be able to be healthy? Would I be able to do the things I do now? Had that not been laid out for me, I'm just now recognizing there was a path for me to get to where I'm now, when I look back at all the things that happened to me and where I ended up, that's like this path, it's so clear now that I didn't see before.

[02:09:15] Rob Roy: I mean, I'm gonna, I'm gonna be a psychologist probably in like. You know, I'll be, I'll be, I'll be a little trained, not trained, but I'll be able to see, I see patients now actually, but I will I'll have my license in, you know, a couple of years, which is amazing. If I go for my PhD, it'd be a couple more years, but all of that, all that stuff that happened to me and everything that's happened to me since boils back down to what happened to me when I was a kid.

[02:09:39] Rob Roy: Like all these years, I never would have thought about, I would have been where I am now. And then my kids are all going to school. They're all very good at what they do. They're all know who they are. They have a substance in their personality and that my look back and people go, you're a good dad.

[02:09:54] Rob Roy: And I'm like, nah, I'm not a good dad. My kids are just good kids. Cause I took away, [02:10:00] I took away the traumas that they would feel in their lives, you know, the sexual assaults or not knowing where their father was and not showing up there. Yeah. I went to all the games. You know, you got to commit to going to the games.

[02:10:12] Rob Roy: You will got to be there. You got to be there for your kids. So when, when they want it, when they want to talk to you, you can't have a how am I to put it to my kids? Let me decide what I'm going to, how I'm going to react or feel with what's happening to you. As opposed to you thinking this was compensating, right?

[02:10:31] Rob Roy: I didn't ever want my kids to compensate. I just, just tell me, and then let me decide. And I have the reaction that I would do if I was like some terrible dad. And then I have the reaction of, let me see, let me have the patience to understand what they're trying to tell me and be grateful that they're telling me and how I can help them because they're listening.

[02:10:47] Rob Roy: So my kids are all doing good. And I, I look back and think that's why I'm raising my grandson. That's why I'm raising my nephew. My grandson's a temporary thing. So my daughter's on deployment, but my, my nephew, you know, I'm trying to teach him these lessons as well. And they're just as As important as they were back then.

[02:11:06] Rob Roy: I'm trying to figure out some things with him and what's going on with him. You know, 16 year old boys are, there's something else. And I see myself in him, you know, traumas and other things that happen, not being wanted. All I can do is say to him, is that life, life, there's so much to life that you haven't seen yet, but it's going to be tough.

[02:11:28] Rob Roy: And that's for all of us. The journey is not easy. I don't know anybody that's got to have an easy journey. 

[02:11:34] David Pasqualone: Not anybody who's 

[02:11:35] Rob Roy: done anything worthwhile. No. If you're going to be a, if you're going to be a a wolf, are you going to be a lion? Life's going to be hard for you. But the rewards are so much, they're so good.

[02:11:49] Rob Roy: But, and it may not, you know, I, I'll say this, is that it, people want to equate things to financial. Yeah, there's, there's money, but, Who you are as a person and that laying your head on the pillow at night time and not having to worry about things is what's important. It's, it can't be everything's backed up by, Oh, these dollars I'm going to get.

[02:12:11] Rob Roy: That's not, it's not about that. That stuff comes right. You do a great job. You're going to get paid. If you don't do a great job, you shouldn't get paid and you shouldn't, people shouldn't help you. And I'm not saying that they shouldn't help you as in people should cast you out. I'm saying that people. We give too much now and the people don't appreciate it.

[02:12:33] David Pasqualone: Yeah. 

[02:12:33] Rob Roy: We just, we just don't. You just, the more you give people, the less they appreciate it. 

[02:12:38] David Pasqualone: Yeah. And 

[02:12:38] Rob Roy: I'm not talking about people that are homeless, right? I'm talking, if you give somebody who's never done anything with their lives, you keep giving them, that's all they're going to do is take. 

[02:12:46] David Pasqualone: Yeah. And look at our government and you can speak openly for or against it, but listen, man, we're.

[02:12:51] David Pasqualone: Socialist, Marxist, communist, different shades of gray. Yeah. We're freaking in a bad place. This is a Republic and we are not living based on the constitution, enforcing laws. We don't need more law. We need to enforce it. But what you're saying is they're giving everything away and it's, nobody appreciates Jack and it's driving us in a hole.

[02:13:13] David Pasqualone: And I see that. I see it in my taxes. 

[02:13:14] Rob Roy: I pay. I'm like, what, what the, what's your goal? 

[02:13:19] David Pasqualone: Any business owners out there. Any business owner out there, what's your number one expense? 

[02:13:24] Rob Roy: It's taxes, taxes. They, they, they taxed a hell out of you. And I see people that just, I've never had a job. Cause I, you know, part of what you do as a therapist is you have to go work at shelters and volunteer.

[02:13:38] Rob Roy: I can't say anything bad about it cause I'm working at one now, but man, that's just like, some people just don't, they're 

[02:13:46] David Pasqualone: never going to get it. You know, we'll talk off camera. I just met a man who is homeless. About a month ago, sitting down at a Panera Bread, talking to him. And I'm like, okay, so what do you want to do?

[02:13:59] David Pasqualone: I'm trying to work them through it. Like, okay, what's your, what, what's something you, you know, goal, like, what do you want to be? And okay, now reverse engineer it. How are you going to get out of this situation? What do you need to do? And he had a shit story, man. He had a tough life. And our own government, while they're funding terrorists, while they're embezzling money, and while they're opening the borders and giving 5, 000 gift cards and cell phones to terrorists, they're letting this American veterans suffer without anything.

[02:14:25] David Pasqualone: Right. So what are the problems? Oh yeah, but I'm trying to communicate to him. Okay, but what are you going to do? It's all, it's all terrible. I agree. Yeah. But what are you going to do to turn this around? You know, cause I can't help him in the sense of if you helped him and gave him a house, if I gave him a job and we gave him a salary.

[02:14:46] David Pasqualone: That doesn't change his mind, his heart. It doesn't change anything. Oh, no, no, 

[02:14:50] Rob Roy: no. Don't change a mind. You can't change that mind. They gotta know their value. And that's the hard part. It's like, How do you get a person to understand? Which is what I [02:15:00] do when I'm talking to my patients. It's like, Let me help you understand your value.

[02:15:04] Rob Roy: And that's where 

[02:15:08] David Pasqualone: I believe the love of God comes in. That's where I believe steadfastly that God is love. And when we see our value to God, the creator of us all, everything else fulfills. It does. At least it did in my life. 

[02:15:21] Rob Roy: Yeah. Well, it does in my life too. I couldn't be here without it. Yeah, I mean, it's, it's obviously like, you know, my kids could have been like other people's kids that are having problems with drugs or don't go to school or didn't need an education or didn't live on their own or just, just so many things that can go wrong.

[02:15:42] Rob Roy: So many things, but I've been blessed. I'm happy. I've been blessed. 

[02:15:46] David Pasqualone: Yeah, man. So listen, I know we have chunked out. Parts of your life, and we can go back later, replay it, and then fill in the gaps in a bonus episode. It's been an honor having you here today, Rob. Thank you. Before we wrap things up and go to where you are today and where you're headed next, how can we help you get there?

[02:16:03] David Pasqualone: We kind of talked about it a little bit, but is there anything we missed between your birth and today, or a final thought you want to leave with the listeners?

[02:16:16] Rob Roy: No, I think we covered a lot. I will say that the biggest problem that one can have in their life is losing their focus on what they want to achieve. And you may not know what you want to achieve if you don't have a good foundation of who you are. Right? Passion's one thing, but knowing who you are and what you want to be able to accomplish is what you need to do.

[02:16:39] Rob Roy: And that sounds like fuzzy math, but it really is knowing your value of who you are. And then that, and then because you have your value and how you serve others is going to help you serve yourself. I 

[02:16:54] David Pasqualone: think that's great words to close on and great thoughts to apply. Ladies and gentlemen, like our slogan says, don't just listen to great information and content, but do it.

[02:17:06] David Pasqualone: Like Rob says, repeat the good habits each day so you can have a great life in this world. Doesn't mean it's going to be easy. You can have a great fulfilled life in this world, but more importantly, an eternity to come with God, our savior. So Rob, if somebody wanted to get ahold of you, continue the conversation, they might want to actually, you know, talk to you personally, how can they overcome the demons in their head from years of abuse?

[02:17:30] David Pasqualone: What's the best way for them to reach you? 

[02:17:32] Rob Roy: The best way to reach me would be I'll give you my email address for my company and it's robert. roy. At trident cc.com. That's robert.Roy@tridentcc.com. We can go to our website, which is www, do wanna say it that way, trident-cc.com. And then you can follow me on Instagram.

[02:17:56] Rob Roy: It's under Trident as well. And Facebook, they're all the, they're all the same. It's all Trident, either under cc or dash cc. And I put out a, I put out a reel every day about how of, how to change things in your lives. 

[02:18:08] David Pasqualone: Beautiful. And we'll put links to these in the show notes. So ladies and gentlemen, reach out to Rob.

[02:18:14] David Pasqualone: And if you have any questions, you got his information now. That's fantastic. And if we can help you in any way, let us know. Share this episode with your friends and family. Let's help as many people as we can. And Rob, it's been a true honor. Thank you, my friend, for being here today. And I look forward to doing a follow up episode.

[02:18:32] David Pasqualone: Okay. Cool, man. Thanks. Excellent. All right, ladies and gentlemen, we love you. Go have a great day. Enjoy life and we'll see you in the next episode. All right, brother. How was that? 

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