Being Different: Adapting to Autism, Setting Proper Expectations, & Learning to Be Present and Kind with Peter Mann

“None of us are as good as all of us together." ~ Peter Mann

Guest Bio: Peter Mann is the CEO & Founder of Virginia-based Oransi, a leading air purification company known for its efficient, intuitive and reliable products for consumers, schools, organizations and businesses. He also is the Chair of the Association of Home Appliance Manufacturers. In 2021, Oransi merged with Aviemore Technologies and is now a motor technology company with a clean energy mission. Oransi’s new manufacturing facility in Radford, Virginia is making products in the USA with advanced motor technologies. Previously, Peter was the Founder & CEO of the Austin, Texas-based Alen Corp., an air purification company he built, and after 7 years had a successful exit. He went to college on a Navy ROTC scholarship and then served 4 years, including a tour in the Red Sea during the First Gulf War. He was a communications officer and then gunnery officer on the USS McCandless. Peter is late diagnosed autistic and now advocates for autism awareness in the workplace.

SHOW NOTES: 

• Website: https://oransi.com/
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/peter-mann/

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CORE THEMES, KEYWORDS, & MENTIONS:

• empathy, awareness, common ground, GE, Syracuse, USA based manufacturing, introverted, autistic, adversity, high needs, on the spectrum, human behavior, entrepreneurial, resilience, marks, routine, ROTC, US Navy, Red Sea, Top Secret Clearance, DotCom bubble burst, asthma, indoor air quality, steroids, filters, mentally exhausting, calculating, perspective, eye contact, no words, expectations,  clarity, vision, management, leadership, marketing, engineering, stretch goals, be kind

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Transcript

Being Different: Adapting to Autism, Setting Proper Expectations, & Learning to Be Present and Kind with Peter Mann 

Do you have autism? Know someone who does? Wondering how to grow through it and still thrive in life? All this and more in this episode right now. 

The Remarkable People Podcast. Check it out.

The Remarkable People Podcast. Listen. Do. Repeat. For Life!.

The Remarkable People Podcast. 

Hello, friends. Welcome to this week's episode of the Remarkable People Podcast, the Peter Man story. This week, we're going to talk about Peter Man growing up and not even knowing he was autistic, how he navigated through childhood, joined the service, started working in companies from the ground up [00:01:00] to an executive level, and then how he became an entrepreneur.

And through his child's illness, it was the catalyst for him inventing an indoor air quality system. That you're going to love. So get your pens and paper out, take this episode and forward it to your friends and family that have autism, you think may have autism or have children of autism, because this will be a great encouragement.

Maybe even pick up some practical tips of how to deal and grow through it and how it's not a curse, but a blessing. You just got to work with it. So at this time, we're going to begin the episode, but I did want to take one minute and just thank our sponsors. MyPillow. MyPillow has been amazing to work with.

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So thank you for your time. Thank you for being a loyal listener. I hope these episodes for the last four years and 200 plus episodes have encouraged you, inspired you, and helped you change your life for the better, because that's what this show is about. Glorifying God and helping you grow. And that's how we glorify God.

If I can do a better job, let me know. Reach out to me through the website. But if not, get ready for a remarkable episode with our friend, [00:04:00] Peter Mann. 

[00:04:01] 4 INTERVIEW Being Different Adapting to Autism Setting Proper Expectations and Learning to be present and kind with Peter Mann 15 April 2024: Hey, Peter, how are you today, brother?

I'm doing great. How are you doing? Man, I'm doing remarkable. Today is an amazing day and I'm glad to have you here. Our listeners are too. We just told them a little bit about you and what to expect in this episode, but right out of the horse's mouth, if they listen to your entire episode, you know, time's the most valuable commodity we have.

By the end of this show, what's one thing you guarantee our listeners all around the world that they're going to be able to get and apply to their lives? Yeah, I would say you know, awareness is, is really important. I think, you know, being able to be aware and have empathy and seeing things from the other person's perspective.

You know, I think in general, there's just too much arguing and squabbling and, you know, going on right now in the world and you know and we're just screaming past each other or at each other and you know I think it's just you know it's critical to really understand each other and [00:05:00] you know don't assume the worst in people and you know look look for common ground that's you know what I would say in general.

And I think that's great advice especially within most countries but in America right now very tumultuous times you got Israel very tumultuous times and. We don't want to be so open minded. Our brains fall out, but we don't want to be intolerant and just bash on people because they have a different opinion.

Right. Yeah. We all got it. At the, you know, at the end of the day, we're all here together. So everybody needs like his, his best. You can get along. And you know, I think we're all better together than we are, you know, fighting each other. It's just not productive and it's drama. And, you know, there's too much.

You know, good going on. And I think there's just, you know you know, there's, there's a lot more good than bad and we tend to focus on the bad and, and forget the good and have gratitude. So I think that's, that's really important. Yeah, I agree, my friend. I [00:06:00] agree. And so, obviously, you were raised a certain way, like we all were.

Good, bad, ugly, pretty, pretty ugly. Everything that happens to us grooms us into the men and women we are today. So, for you to get to the point where you're like, the whole episode's going to have gold in it, but empathy and to understand, to form common ground. Something in your life brought you to this place.

So let's start with your story. Where were you born? What was your upbringing like? Was it like this or was it polar opposite? What was your beginnings like, Peter? Yeah, I grew up in Syracuse, New York, and you know, my dad was a manager at General Electric. You know, which, you know, is a pretty huge company in Syracuse.

And my mom stayed at home. So I have, you know, there's five kids, sort of pretty large family. And so I kind of grew up around the world of GE and Syracuse university. In terms of sports and, you know, the things that they had going on, as well as GE in terms of all the business things they [00:07:00] had, and the technology, and, you know, they used to make color TVs just two miles down the road from where we lived, and, and it's just been kind of interesting to kind of watch all these jobs just leave and, you know, just kind of see what it was to see what it is now.

It's a different, a bit of a different world. And yeah. You know, growing up there, it was, you know, it was, I felt kind of fortunate because I was really exposed to really you know, world class company and then as well as the university and all that had to offer in terms of like education and, kind of balancing, balancing.

That was those two things. That was kind of my world growing up. And you said you five kids in your family, were you the oldest and youngest? I'm number four. Yeah. All right. What was that like? We always fighting to get place at the table, to get heard, or was it pretty balanced? We were all pretty introverted.

And so. [00:08:00] You know, my sister's 10 years older, so she was like a second mom to me kind of growing up. So, that's maybe not a normal, maybe with a 10 year age gap, that's normal, but I mean, it's all I knew. So it seemed normal to me at the time, but, you know, I don't know how many kids nowadays would want to be a second mom when you're 10 or 11.

Yeah. So your parents had three children, then a 10 year gap, then you and one more. Well, they, no, they had three children and then like a six year gap and then me and then my younger brother's like a little over a year younger. Okay. Gotcha. Yeah. Very nice. Very nice. And then again, we don't want to spend or dig up things that aren't there.

Just, your childhood pretty good anything that happened that you feel like really molded you to who you are today you just want to keep going through middle school high school yeah i mean it was it was pretty rough i wasn't you know ready for school you know i didn't talk really until third grade you know i've found out like [00:09:00] more recently that that i'm autistic and that explains like everything that i went through being different And so you know, now it was kind of a, you know, an advantage because I had to deal with adversity and being different and not understanding why.

And you know, at that time they weren't diagnosing folks that were not high needs or, you know, like, you know, like it is now. And, you know, it was elementary school was a really a challenge for me to get through. I don't, most people like have fond memories of elementary school. It was pretty much a nightmare for me.

I was just, you know, getting sixth grade was, was when things started to change for me, but, you know, it was, it was pretty, pretty rough just being a different kid. Yeah, and back then, everything we did, if it didn't fit in the norm, it was considered weak or what's wrong with you. It wasn't, even the teachers, they weren't kind and [00:10:00] understanding, right?

Oh, no, they weren't kind. It was kind of verbally abusive. And so it's, yeah, so you kind of, I guess I got tougher going through that process, but, you know, I don't think, well, maybe they still do that now, but I think there's a lot more awareness. Around that, around differences and, you know, kind of how people are wired.

But that really you know, it kind of started my interest in human behavior because I knew I was different, but I was so fascinated at how different other people were. And I was just trying to. understand and I would watch and I would just kind of see how people would do social interactions and it's like that doesn't come natural to me or you know so it's you know kind of a bit of bit of a person from a different planet is kind of what that was like for me and so but you know in my entrepreneurial career it's been really helpful because you you know You know, things are tough and competitive and you have to have [00:11:00] resilience.

And, you know, I kind of kind of grew a lot through that experience in my, you know, younger years. Yeah. And God talks about that, how all things work together for good to them that love God, called according to his purpose. So even the worst things in our lives somehow will ultimately end up turning good, but it's not fun going through the kid and being picked on and feeling different and you know, alone.

And I don't want to put words in your mouth, but that's how you felt at times. Like I'm different. Yeah, I knew I was different. And I was, you know, I didn't really pay attention to kids. It, to me, the, my biggest struggle was like teachers that were kind of not very kind. And it's like you go to school and you're a little kid and you think the teacher is there to protect you.

And it's like, not necessarily the case, at least, you know, from my experience. And, you know, they didn't know anything. Nobody's trained, nobody. Like, you just didn't know a lot. Like, back then they just thought I was being difficult or smart, like, like asking [00:12:00] me a question and I'm like, I don't know the answer to that.

And it's like, how do you not know the answer? And just like going off on me. It's like, yeah, it's, It's, yeah, it kind of, it's amazing how, like, certain events leave marks or you just remember, you go immediately back to that moment. And then I'm like, I am not treating anybody like that, but it's so inappropriate to, you know, treat someone like that.

You know, you need to control yourself and, you know, respect other people. It's, you know, I think it's kind of like how I'm wired naturally anyways, but just, Kind of like living it, it's like I've, I'm committed, I will never do that. It's just not right. And it's like, what do you, what do you get out of that anyways?

Yeah, and that's just it. When people face that kind of adversity and pain, they either tend to roll it down the hill to somebody else or they go the polar opposite. And that's thankfully what you did. You're like, I don't want to be picked on or embarrass people or hurt [00:13:00] people. So you develop that empathy.

Now you mentioned in sixth grade, things started changing. How so? Yeah, so in elementary school, from like, from my perspective, it was just chaos, because there's no schedule, there's just all these kids, and you know, there's no structure to it. When you get to sixth grade, like, You have a schedule, you have like class, like you have a routine that gets settled and that's for an autistic person.

That's huge because you have expectations and you know what your day is going to be like, and you can mentally prepare yourself for everything. Elementary school, it's like, it's, it's, there's none of that. And so, you know, and plus I was getting a little bit more mature you know, like from a math standpoint, I was at least two years ahead of where I was verbally and they started to catch up verbally.

I was just way behind. You know, with where that was kind of added to the struggles being [00:14:00] so far behind, but that's pretty typical with autistics. Like if you have a kid now that kind of has that, that profile, they're going to get screened and they're going to. Have support and, you know, all of that for kids now, it just didn't happen in seventies and eighties.

Yes. Now, did you your brothers and sisters, you said you were all quiet and introverted. Did they have the same struggle or were they quiet, but not autistic? They were quiet, but not so bad. My dad, now I look back, I'm sure he was autistic because he basically was the same way. In school, and it's like, you don't hear many people say that, like, I didn't make a sound in kindergarten.

And you really didn't talk until third grade and my dad was the same way and it's You know, and now we're finding out it's like 90 plus percent genetic. And so while my siblings aren't autistic, they, they do have some traits that are similar. So we're all pretty, like, quiet [00:15:00] introverted, except when we're all together.

And then it's weird because we're all become, like, loud and, you know, Yeah, comfortable with each other, but when like we're out in the world, it's like quiet. Yeah, no, that's a real thing. Yeah. So now you get into middle school, starts being more structure. Take us between middle school and college, like anywhere you want to stop that significance.

Yeah. I mean, I did really well. I got into, so the other thing that helped me is I got into cross country and track and, you know, in sixth grade and I was running and It's pretty common for autistic person to get into like solo, like distance events, like running or swimming, or, you know, I'd shoot hoops by myself, and I did really well in all of that.

And so that really helped my self esteem. And, you know, I kind of, it was funny. I kind of started at the bottom and worked my way up to the, all the advanced and towards the top through high school. Yeah. And so, and then I got [00:16:00] a, NROTC, Navy ROTC scholarship. And so I went to University of Rochester on a ROTC scholarship, completed, you know, that in four years.

And then, then I was in the Navy for four years. And that was You know, I didn't know what I wanted to do, and it was a free ride to a really good school. And, you know, it just seemed like a really positive thing to do. And so I have you know, I'm glad I did it with the Navy, but I, you know, I just did my four years and got out.

You know, we were in, we were, I was naive. I didn't realize that, like, we could go to war because we had, like, in my life growing up, it was like, after. Vietnam, but there hadn't really been anything. And it's like, where the first Gulf War started, you're like, Oh, you guys are going over to the Red Sea for the war.

And it's [00:17:00] like, I feel so dumb not even realizing that you go through all the training, all these exercises, and you're like, Oh no, this is real now. It's just, it got like real, real quick. And so, you know, that was, you know, that was some stuff to process to do that. But, you know, I did, did really well with that.

And, you know, I'm kind of, you know, had really good experiences and the guys in the ship are great. You can't get more structured than the U S Navy, right. Or except a Marine, maybe. Yeah, the Marines, the Marines are a little more hardcore. We did have some Navy SEALs from time to time on the ship and those guys were, those guys were pretty tough.

But did you appreciate that structure and that they told you what to do, when to do it? Yeah, the structure was, was good. You know, it's, it's kind of a bit much in some ways because like they have all these like [00:18:00] everything is documented. Like there's all these rules on volumes and volumes of books and I'm like, that seems a bit excessive.

But, you know, the structure was good. I, I knew that I'd go to college, I have a guaranteed job. So it kind of eliminated any ambiguity for me. You know, and I get to travel the world. Then. You know, you know, I wasn't planning on being in the Red Sea for any period of time. That wasn't in my scope of possibilities, but what it, you know, it is what it is.

You know, and it was really good experience to deal, you know, under pressure and, you know, and just kind of persevere through that. Awesome. So then what was your role in the military? Do you mind me asking? Sure. I was first, I was communications officer, which is the one in charge of all the communication systems, all the crypto codes.

So I had a top secret security clearance and, you know, we changed the codes out every day. So I was responsible for that. And that's, that's [00:19:00] kind of a tough job because You're expected to do it perfectly. And if you, if you mess up, you're really in trouble because you're, you have top secret code. So you have to protect.

It's one of those jobs where it's like, there's no upside, but a whole lot of downside if you don't do it. Right. And so, you know, that was something really had to pay attention to. And then after that, I was a gunnery officer and that was my job when we got sent over to the Red Sea. I was in charge of.

You know, many of the weapon systems on the ship and, you know, that was, you know, kind of a cool job, you know, being in the room with all the computer screens and all the radars and all of that kind of stuff and, you know, talking to the guys controlling the weapon systems and the captain and, and I did really well there because I was super calm.

Like you don't want anybody, you know, like my boss was the ops officer and he kind of. He would get spun up sometimes [00:20:00] and get really emotional and I'm just like calm, right? That's where being autistic like comes in comes in handy because like I didn't get rattled. It's just like just talking calmly through some some a couple like pretty intense, you know, situations where you didn't know like what was happening or like we had some like fighter jets coming at us that we didn't know who they were.

And it's like, holy cow, do we shoot them down? We don't know, you know, they're not communicating with us. So they don't seem like they're friendly. And, you know, you have to make some like real splits, split second decisions, you know, that are, you don't expect as a young, you know, 20 something year old to have to make.

And when you are in these situations, again, how God built you, autism or not, like you said, you stayed and remained calm on the inside. Like you, you did mention like, Ooh, what do we do? That was kind of like, Oh, [00:21:00] okay. This is higher alert, but like, it doesn't raise your heart rate or, I mean, you could still two plus two is four.

Is that how your mind works? It's just factual. Yeah, it was completely logical and calm. And you know, cause for me, it's like, there's no point in getting worked up. Like that's going to make things worse. And so I was really dialed in to just being focused and, you know, looking at what's going on and, you know, kind of more of a medical mindset than, you know, my boss.

I could see my boss who would just be emotional and they're like, you need to leave the room because you're, you're not helping. And that made me even calmer just because I'm like, I need to be calm. You know, I can't freak out. Yeah. And there are people like that. It's like when everything hits the fan, nine out of 10 people panic.

And there's always that one person gets calmer and more focused. And those are the people we need in emergencies. You want that. Yeah. You don't want that person. Like if I'm freaking out, then you need to start [00:22:00] worrying because like there's things aren't good. Yeah. Yeah. All right. So where does your life go from there, Peter?

You're in the military. Yeah. It was interesting. I got out, this was in the early to mid nineties. It was interesting. It was before 9 11. So getting out of the military was. Like, well, you don't have relevant experience. It wasn't the thing it is now. It really changed after nine 11, but prior to that, it was, it was almost a liability to have the military experience.

And I had trouble articulating like how it was relevant to working at a company. So I, I did get a job, but it was really low wage. It was like 20, 000 a year. Even in the nineties, that was tough. That was low. Like I was making at least 50, 60, 70 percent more than that. And you didn't have all the taxes and you know, it was like, at least I took like close to a 50 [00:23:00] percent pay cut just to get a job, to get experience.

Cause you know, and, and, but then I was fortunate to, after about a year, year and a half, I got a job at a company called Tech Data. It's in Florida Clearwater. And you know, they kind of grew from a fortune 500 to fortune 100. And I started at the bottom and just kind of worked my way up to a director level, which is pretty solid.

And I just, and then from there I got recruited to Dell and I. I was a senior manager. I managed, developing functionality for Dell. com. And then I also managed I was in marketing and managed pricing strategy and rolling out a bunch of products and got a really good experience in terms of marketing and operations.

What years were you with Dell? Early 2000s. I kind of left, there was the dot com bubble burst, which was [00:24:00] pretty rough because we were laying off people every couple weeks, it felt like, and the morale was just really low, it was kind of, you know, I went there, like, coming out of the 90s, the computer industry was on fire, and then you hit the dot com bubble burst, and it's like, it goes the other way, and so it's, it was pretty rough, You know, just, you know, I wasn't worried about my job, but just laying off people on a regular basis was just kind of, it was not my thing.

Yeah. And I think at that point, Gateway got tanked when Ted Waite left and then he came back. So Dell and Gateway were back and forth at that time, right? Early 2000. Yeah. And it was HP and Compaq. It was like a handful of guys. Yeah, there's a lot of very competitive, super competitive. Yeah. Very cutthroat and, you know, but the good thing is the dot com bubble burst kind of pushed me to go and, you know, get into business myself.

And I started, or co founded an e commerce business with another guy in Austin, [00:25:00] you know, and built that up over seven years and sold that. 2009, I started Aransi, which is the current company to. Based upon really influence my son had as an infant, he struggled with asthma and it was, you know, it was pretty tough with all the steroids and medications he had to get, kind of his quality of life, through that and not being able to breathe and You know, he gets a couple of times, he's just changing colors.

And if you're holding them and it's like, I don't know, there's nothing I can do. And so I really got interested in air quality and, you know, what can I do to help him and people like him that doesn't involve just administering a bunch of medicines and things that are going to freak him out. Cause I saw what it did to him when you, you know, when he was taking the steroids, and so, yeah, so that was kind of the foundation and I just kind of built the company up really over the last 15 years.

And then in between we kind of skipped a major step. Where did you meet your wife [00:26:00] to have a child? Oh, yeah, I met her in college. Okay. Skipped, I was all work focused, but yeah, we met in college and it was, you know, in the Navy, the cultures, I guess you kind of align with the culture that you're in. And so you know, everyone has, not everyone, but in general, people have kids, you know, very young.

And so, you know, the the two boys were born, the first one was born when I was In the Navy, I was probably like 25 or 26 and the other one was a couple years later. But yeah, pretty young to have two kids. Yeah. And you're in the military, you're traveling. And then you get out and now you're trying to, you know, start your career.

And like you said, you had to work from the ground up, then you go to Delta. Yeah, you have a kid and you're making 20, 000 a year. And it's like, that's the whole family income. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And we weren't [00:27:00] getting, and we shouldn't have, but we weren't getting bailouts either. So it's, you had to work your ass off and figure it out.

Yeah, and that's, that's kind of part of it, but that's, those are good skills to have, especially if you get into entrepreneurship, you got to figure everything out. Nobody's there really to help you. I mean, there's services and stuff, but it's really on the individual to kind of sink or swim in a, in a sense.

A hundred percent, a hundred percent. So you're now married, you've got two kids, you're working, you're growing your career. And then your son, your first son or second son gets the asthma. It's the second one. I mean, they're, they're actually older now. They're closer to 30 years old now. Like it's, I'm old.

So, yeah, I mean, he, he kind of outgrew it. I would say as he was entering high school, you kind of, I guess when you get it really young like that, it's not uncommon to essentially outgrow it, but it was, it was pretty [00:28:00] rough. His younger years having to deal with that. But you, so this was the catalyst for your.

I, yeah, that was the inspiration. Yeah. Yeah. That's kind of that, that always stuck with me. Cause it really left an impression that this is a problem. You know, when you, you know, you experienced like a medical issue that in a child, it's it's your child. I mean, unless you're a sociopath or something, I don't know.

It doesn't affect you. And so I'm like, let's see what we can do. They, you know, make a business out of this and try and help people. Yeah. And so how did it come about? Did you design it? Did you put it out to market? How did you actually create? Yeah, I started, yeah, I started, you know you know, I'm just a guy that has marketing experience and operations experience.

I'm not a manufacturer. And so originally I started, I had some relationships with some factories in China and worked with them to develop some products. And then as it evolved started to [00:29:00] make product through a contract manufacturer in Connecticut, you know, worked with designers in the U. S.,

designed all new systems from scratch. So it was kind of like a step by step building block over some years. It wasn't like, I didn't have like a ton of cash to, to do all that. So I kind of had to start small and. And, you know, build up from there. And now it's, it's, I've never could have imagined what it is now.

We merged with a motor company here in Virginia. And so we have a, you know, pretty large factory. We're designing and manufacturing our own products. We just started that last month. And so you reshort manufacturing. Yeah. That was kind of something that I'd always wanted to do. Cause growing up in Syracuse with all the manufacturing and, you know, maybe it's nostalgia.

I don't know what it is, but it's, you know, we kind of figured out how to make our products here comparably priced and maybe a little better performance than the Chinese. And, you know, not many people can say [00:30:00] that, but you know, it was not an overnight thing. It was probably 10 years in the making too.

Yeah, and they say the average quote unquote overnight success is about nine years these days, so you're right on point, man. Yeah, it wasn't, definitely wasn't overnight. It's, it's baby steps. Yeah, so let me ask you a question because this show is all about our humanity and we have listeners from around the world.

I consistently over a hundred countries tune in. We have all sorts of cultures. You know, there's one race, the human race, but there's different cultures, different countries. When you have Autism as a child, that gets a lot of focus, but autistic children turn into autistic adults. How is that now leading a family?

You had a wife, you have two boys, what did you experience and what did you learn that we can help other people with? Whether you learn the easy way or the hard way, let's help as can. Yeah, so I wasn't, I wasn't diagnosed until a couple of years [00:31:00] ago, so I kind of went through most of my life not knowing I was autistic.

And, and for me, it kind of showed up in some misunderstandings or, I mean, it, it's, you know, it's like people don't act that way. Are you playing games with me? It's like, no, I'm not, like, I don't, I didn't, there's times where it's, how do I, how do I say it? There's times that, or there's social cues that typical people pick up that autistic people just miss.

And, you know, there's situations where there's a certain expectation that you'll act a certain way or, and for me, sometimes I just wouldn't have anything to say because I'm still processing what's going on. And then it's like, well, why, why can't you talk? You know? And so it's, it's, it's a lot better now that I understand what it is.

And, and you know, kind of comfortable in situations or, you know, so it's also about [00:32:00] expectations in certain situations. And so, you know, I, I'm really glad that I got diagnosed and understand what it is, but previous to that, there occasionally would be situations where it's just, it was difficult, like social awkwardness, or, you know, you go to a party and like, I have no thoughts in my head of what to even say to this person.

And someone's trying to have a conversation with you and you're like, what is wrong with him? It's like, this, this person is not normal. And I'm like, no, that's correct. What are some tips or tools or techniques you're using now to help with it? That maybe a listener can share with themselves or their family members or friends that are struggling?

Yeah. I mean, for me, It's, it's all about the awareness. And, you know, for me, like I have to be my best self to be able to, it takes a lot of energy [00:33:00] to do something like that. And so I have to really take care of myself. I have to get proper sleep. I have to eat well. I have to actually, I have to be like on my game because there is an immense amount of mental processing that takes place in social conversations that is natural and happens in the background for most people.

That for an autistic person, you are thinking through every single thing that's going on. You're taking in all The things that are going on around you in the environment, all of the, all of the noises, like everything's in input. We don't have the filters that, that a typical person has. And so it's, it's kind of mentally exhausting.

And so for me, I have to be in the right environment. It can't be like a super loud restaurant is, is, is too much. It's just like over, like, it's like if you turn the volume twice as loud is what it's like for me. And it's like, I can't. You're anything that's going on, and so it's having awareness to [00:34:00] what it takes to be like your best self like physically and mentally but also be in the right environment.

And if folks understand like you're that way in some ways it's they give you a pass or they have understanding or they have empathy. That, you know, what comes naturally for some people is not natural. It's you're thinking through everything, like calculating everything or processing everything. And, and over time, it just becomes exhausting.

And so when folks understand that and understand that sometimes you need a little longer to answer a question you know, they have grace and kindness. And that goes a long ways I think it working, you know, with anyone who, you know, this is a bit different. If you give people the benefit of the doubt, I think it's always helpful.

Don't assume the worst in people and, you know, and try and see things from their perspective, because You know, just because [00:35:00] someone's different doesn't mean, you know, you don't assume the worst. They, you know, you never, you don't know what somebody's going through. You don't know. You know, not everyone's wired the same, I guess is, is my, my point.

Yeah. So people aren't wired the same and people, you know, like you said, you want to have that kind of grace and understanding towards people. Yeah. When you're in this situation, like, especially whether it's at home or business, let's just pick at business first. Yep. Do you share with people? Like, hold on a second.

I just need a little more time. Like, how do you communicate? Yes. To say, I need more time because some people haven't figured it out and they're struggling and they don't know that. Yeah. You get judged. And yeah, now I say like people around me know it. And sometimes they're like, Oh, why don't you just take some time and think about that?

Like, I don't even have to say it half the time. Like if it's people that know me well, I mean, certain things I can immediately respond to, but if it's something I've never thought of before. It may take [00:36:00] me like hours or minutes or day to like come up with because I'm wanting to get the best answer possible and it's not something that you know just I, I arrive at that quickly.

And so, you know, I often say, well, let me get back to you on that. It's kind of learning for me, like little tips and tricks to kind of, you know, not make the other person feel bad, but still kind of like move the ball forward, I guess, in a conversation. Yeah. And that's what we're here. That's what I was saying.

For people who are struggling with autism, what tips and tricks do you have for them so they can benefit their life? So you're saying, just say, Hey, Let me think about that and I'll get back to you. That's yeah. Yeah. And give yourself, like, don't be hard on yourself. Like there's enough, like hard things going on.

Like give yourself a pass and you know, everyone's trying their best and you know, and if you need time, just say, Hey, let me, you know, let me get back to you tomorrow on that. Let me think, think it through. I [00:37:00] don't feel the need, like, I struggle with eye contact to a certain extent. You know, it's something, you know, as a child it was, like, constantly berated for.

But, you know, for me, when I explain, if I look at someone in the eye, like, my brain kind of shuts down. I'm not processing properly. It just, so it's like, do you want me to, to Listen and answer your question, or do you want me to make eye contact and not have the ability to process what you're saying and get like, those are my choices.

Like, you know, give me a pass on the eye contact thing. Let me ask you a question. School, we're going to go back because this is something I'm very actually interested in this topic, so I'm glad we're having this interview today. When you were in school, they used to talk, put stuff on the board, tell you to take notes.

Yep. Did you struggle with that? Because I remember being in school, I'm like, I can listen and retain. I can take notes and read it later, but [00:38:00] why am I bothering coming to school? I can just read anybody else's notes, but I couldn't do both at once and I never understood how people did that. Did you struggle with that too?

I struggled with all the verbal stuff. Yeah. Yeah. You know, I couldn't read very well. Like we'd have to like read out loud. That was a nightmare for me because I don't know what it is with tracking and then the word turning like letters into words like in your brain. It was, it was a bit of a train wreck.

I hated it every time I had to do that. Plus you're, you have all the attention on you in the room. It's, you know I don't know if they still do that. Maybe they do, but for me it was, I mean, I can do it now, but back then. It was rough. But yeah, like I'm more of a visual learner. I'm not a, like auditory, you know, kind of, kind of a thing.

Do you remember anything you did? Cause obviously you went [00:39:00] on to, you did all right in school. You got into a good college. You got great, you know, even though it's hard to get that first job, you got a great career with Dell and on and you became an entrepreneur, started your own company. A lot of times when you talk to people with these kind of just challenges in life, they go right into entrepreneurship so they can do their own thing and bypass all the hassle.

You kind of went through it. So what did you do to bridge the system? To go from where you were to functioning within the system with all the red tape they have? Yeah, I mean, so I started in business like, I don't know, 92, 93. And, you know, I think with the internet, it's a lot easier to be an entrepreneur now than it was, you didn't really have the internet back then.

And so I think there's just so many more opportunities that just like back then, it seemed like you just worked for the man, you know, if you work for a company, that's kind of. At least that seemed to be how it was for most people. And so I didn't [00:40:00] really see entrepreneurship as an option and I didn't have confidence in myself that I would be able to be successful with it.

Cause like, I have no experience with it. Like this is like complete unknown. And so for me, working at those companies was like my on the job MBA is how I approached it. And I always wanted to be an entrepreneur because I wanted the autonomy. And that's probably partly from being autistic. Like you really want autonomy.

I don't, I mean, I could do a lot of things and do it really well, but I, I kind of struggle in some of the larger companies where there's the political stuff that goes on. Cause I, I don't, I just get the job done and just. That's it. And, and, and when you see people getting promoted past you that, you know, I'm trying to be objective, but it's like, I don't understand how that guy is promoting beyond me.

But I, I knew it was from the social side is, is where my challenges were. And so, you know, I kind of used it as. You know, [00:41:00] I'm growing and learning, and I just used it as an opportunity to gain experience, like everything was about learning and experience and then maybe I can use this down the road, leverage it that way, instead of it.

You know, cause I, I didn't think it, I don't know what I would have done from an entrepreneurial standpoint, starting out, out of the Navy. Yeah. That would have been hard. Very, very hard. Okay. So now what about in the personal life? I mean, it's hard to communicate human to human. And then men are men and women are women and we're equal, but we're different.

And that right there, men usually gravitate towards facts, women gravitate more towards feelings. Now you're a man that actually has less feeling because how God wired you. So how did you overcome that in your marriage? I'm sure there were some fun moments. Yeah, I mean, I would say even though autistic people are perceived as not having feelings, it's from myself and I would say [00:42:00] most autistic folks I've talked to, you, you actually have very strong emotions.

It just doesn't come across. Like I could be feeling something hugely intensely and my face is the same. It doesn't, it doesn't, it's like the, I don't know, flat face or it's it's just calm. So it's calm here, but I could be just like. Going nuts on the inside. So you have this, I thought you said earlier that you didn't pick up on verbal cues and emotion.

That's why I brought that question. Yeah, but on the, but hold on. On the other side, inside, you're saying to others, to others, I'm seeing a stoic face, but on the inside, you're having the same anxiety or the same rage or the same love. It's just not showing here. Yeah. In fact, you have almost higher levels of feeling and higher levels of empathy.

You just, you just can't look at someone who's autistic or that's the general, but generally and tell what's going on inside them. It's like, you, [00:43:00] you just like, you know, I would often have some people say, I don't want to play poker with you because it's like, because I don't give off anything, whether it's good, bad, you know, whatever's going on, like, you just can't read it.

And it's, this may sound funny, but you know, if we go out to a restaurant, like I sometimes have to like remind myself to smile because that's, because that's what the other, you know, that's kind of what you're supposed to do. And it's like, I kind of feel that, but it's like, it's, it's, it's a lot of things are like mental exercises that you, you, you have to remember to do.

You know, sometimes in the moment that, that a lot of people, it's just, they just kind of wear their. I don't know, emotions like on their sleeve or on their face. Like you can just, it's, it's all transparent. And yeah, and for me and a lot of other autistic folks, it's just, it just it just doesn't work that way.[00:44:00] 

Got you. And now what about with a marriage? I mean, communication is so hard as it is with someone you live with 24 hours a day, seven days a week, 365 days a year for years. How has it positively or negatively affected your marriage? And more importantly, what tips, if you learn the hard way after all these years, what tips do you have for other married people with autism?

It's, you know, there would be times, like, she would pour her heart out, and I would be like, I don't know even what to say. Like, my, And that doesn't go over very well, like, and it's, and it's, it's a misunderstanding now that we know I'm autistic, it's like, that doesn't happen because or at least it's significantly less than what it, than what it was before, because she's like, what is wrong with you?

Like, I respond. And if I'm not, you know, if I'm like tired or I'm sick and I'm [00:45:00] just. You know, I'm kind of operating at 50%. I, I have like no words and like, I don't even know what to say. I just like, all I do is like hug. And it, you know, it's, it's not what's expected. It's a lot of, it's around expectations.

And if you're acting in a way that's different, it's like, what is wrong with you? And so now that, now that we know haven't really, you know, in the last two years, maybe once, but really haven't been having those challenges. It's really just the awareness. And really for me, I put work in every day to make sure I'm my best self and I'm not like worn down and get into a situation where I just can't function like a hundred percent because I, and I, and I have to remind myself, you need to be present.

You need to be present. Someone's talking like, really need to listen, process, and then be a human being. And, you know, it's, it's gotten [00:46:00] dramatically better since, since the diagnosis. And I would say there's a lot of folks, you know, in the, in the seventies, it was one in 2, 500 were diagnosed as being autistic.

Now it's one in 40, one in 50. And it's not that there's more autistic kids now than before. It's just, you weren't diagnosed. Like the, the, the psychology or the assessments and awareness of the brain and all that has like, it was in the dark ages in the seventies and eighties. I mean, it's crazy. It's not that long ago.

And it's like. What were they doing? This is like a whole new thing, apparently, you know, to understand it. And you know, so I'm saying is there's a lot of adults who do, who are autistic like me and don't know it. And, and often they get diagnosed when their kids get diagnosed and they're like, you're, you know, kid's autistic.

And then they're like, you need to get screened as well. You're just like [00:47:00] your kid. And so there's starting to be more adults figuring it out, but there's still a huge, I mean, if you go from one in 2, 500 to one in 50, it's like, that's a lot of people. Oh yes. A hundred percent. Yeah, and you got to wonder too, because I remember growing up and you know, you look around the classroom and average kid when I grew up, there's like 35 kids in each class.

Yeah. And you know, there was maybe one or two that I'd look back and say they were autistic, but now like you're saying, It's like a larger percentage. So I definitely believe what, what do they call the spectrum? Like the level, right? I believe definitely they're better diagnosing people on the spectrum, but I do think there's some other, I mean, and you told me what you think, but I think there's something else affecting us where more people have more severe versions of it, because looking at.

You know, my, our generation, I think we're about [00:48:00] the same age, but looking at our generation, more of our children as a whole, like society wise. seem to have more severe issues. So I, I tend to believe, well, what caused that? Is it the vaccines? Is it the food supply? Is it, you know, I, I don't know. I feel like there's more than just awareness.

What are your thoughts on that, Peter, as having it? So the diagnostics have changed dramatically over the years. Like, I don't know, they call this thing DSM, the diagnostic something, I don't know what it stands for, but it has all kinds of conditions in it. And if you go back 40 years or whatever, like it was a thinner book.

And so, you know, I think when you went through the early 2000s, at least with autism, there are a lot of people that were blaming vaccines because it's like, well, we're doing all these vaccines and these kids are being diagnosed with, with autism. And so it's like, [00:49:00] you know, they're kind of doing some kind of correlation, but it it's, you know, they've, Pretty much, pretty well showed that's not the case, you know, autism runs in families and I can look at my family and my nieces and nephews and it's pretty prevalent, like in, in our group, not everything's genetic, there's, there's still some that are environmental or there's other conditions.

So that maybe is along the lines of what you were referring to. But with autism now, where they're thinking is it's highly genetic and I can just see people in my family and it's, you know, it's obvious, right? Yeah. And I don't, I don't doubt that at all. Cause I guess what I'm getting at is this, me and you were looking back to our second grade classroom.

Yeah. How many kids in second grade were like you? In your memory? I don't know. Maybe just you or maybe one other. Right. Maybe just me. Yeah. Okay. That's what I'm saying. That's the baseline. That's where I remember too. Yeah. 35 kids in [00:50:00] my class, there's one or two that I look back and say, yeah, that's kind of, yeah, that's kind of the math.

Yep. Okay. Okay, so we agree on that, but this is what I'm saying. Now you go into a second grade classroom, there's like 10 kids. So I don't know about that. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. There's just so many more children struggling with this that I, it's the genetics. Isn't the only, I agree for sure. There's non behavioralism.

I'm just talking autism. Yeah. Yeah. I'm sure there's all sorts of reasons, but I just feel as though from observation, there's more children with it than there was in our generation. And so that does. Raise the question, why? But that's not your expertise and we're not going to harp on that episode, but I didn't want your thought as a man who struggled, who grew through it.

So I, I, I've, I've researched it. Like when you're autistic, you have very few interests, but you go really deep into certain things. And when I found out I was autistic, I went pretty deep into, into understanding [00:51:00] what it was and following all the experts in the field. And like people that have been doing this for 50 years and.

And, and really listening to everything they say, and then look for differing opinions. And like, I don't want to, you know, have confirmation bias and just go down a rabbit hole. You know, but it's you know, I think a lot of it is the, there's the, you know, I think the largest factor of the numbers going up with autism, specifically autism, is because they changed the criteria.

Like, if you change the criteria for what qualifies as it, you're gonna get all sorts of people. Because it's a much broader net. Like, back in the 70s and 80s, like, you had to be very high needs. Like, you know. That, well, diabetes, diabetes, high blood pressure, they keep changing the metric. So, oh yeah, you drop it 20 points.

Of course, more people have high blood pressure. Right. And that's the score or the scoring method. Like you're going to get more people that, that hit this. You're lowering the bar in a sense or expanding what it [00:52:00] is. And then you're going to get more people just because it's not the way you did it before.

They keep, it keeps evolving as to how they, they used to have Asperger's is separate from autism. And then they grouped them together. It's one spectrum. So, I mean, I would have been Asperger's, but, you know, I'm not. I was diagnosed when Asperger's was kind of killed off as a separate thing and grouped in with the mix.

So now today, Peter, we, is it between your birth and today, is there anything we miss that you want to discuss? Or do you want to transition to where's Peter today, where are you heading next, and how can we as a Remarkable Community help you get there? I think that's the highlights. I mean, the, I'm really excited about what we're doing now with our manufacturing.

We merged with a company that invented a new electric motor technology, which really gives us a platform to make all kinds of new products, which I'm really excited about. And, [00:53:00] you know, it's, it's kind of interesting in a way that I come more from the marketing and Which is like when you were talking about men and women and like, like marketing is about emotions and feelings.

And so like, that's actually my experience and that side. And now I'm working with a lot of engineers who are more of kind of the world I used to come from, which was all numbers and process and no emotion. It's it's, and it's, and it's kind of melding these two worlds together and try it's almost. Like that counseling, but it's like you're taking two worlds and trying to get each to see the other's perspective and what each other, what each other brings to the table.

And it kind of is marriage is, is kind of like that. And so that's kind of what I'm doing now. And, you know, I think that's kind of where the empathy comes from, where you need empathy on both sides. Yeah. And do you manage, do you have employees directly under you or how, how is your structure? [00:54:00] Yeah. I mean, I'm the CEO, but I'm kind of only CEO because I founded it.

Like I would never, I know, like I would never in a normal company be able to work my way up. I just, just wouldn't happen. Like I know some other autistic people that are CEOs and they a hundred percent started their own business. That's, that's how you get that, that role. But yeah, we have, I mean, 30 some odd people, it's not a huge team, but we're going to be adding, probably a hundred or so in the next 18 months as we wrap up manufacturing.

So yeah, I know what I was asking is like, do you, cause some people like would be self aware. Like I have a hard time communicating and feeling empathy. So I'm going to put a layer between me and the staff. So they, they put a management role. So do you directly manage or do you work with the managers?

You know, the chief marketing officer I work with you know, head of our customer service. I work with our sales person, you [00:55:00] know, kind of the, you know, heads of those, those organizations, those teams, I guess, like interact with the individual team members, you know, cause I want to, you know, be involved and make sure they're okay.

Yeah. That's great leadership. Now, are there any, are there any techniques you've learned to help you communicate with your staff better?

Hmm. Yeah. I mean, it's. There's a, you know, there's, I don't know if this is communication, but it's having clarity on like where you're going and being able to communicate that. There's a difference between management and leadership, and there's a lot of folks tend to go into management, which is very top down, very, you know, I don't know if authoritarian is the right word, but like very much, you know, non collaborative and then there's like leadership, which is really like valuing people and understanding [00:56:00] people and working with them so they can be the best selves.

And in that, that's kind of important to me. You know, I think we're a lot better results come from. And for me, it's trying to stay out of what they're doing, which is kind of hard sometimes, but yet telling them more about like where we're going and being as clear as in crisp as I can on that. So they see how their role fits into that and how they're contributing to that and how they're a valuable team member and what they're doing is, you know, kind of worthwhile.

And that really helps them as individuals. You know, be part of a team and, you know, cause we can't do anything without the folks on our team. Like I, like none of us are as good as all of us together and we all gotta be pulling in the same direction. And so it's, to me, it's more around just kind of seeing where we are and seeing where we're going and being able to, you know, communicate this is the path to how to get there.

And if it, you know, is it [00:57:00] believable and is it achievable and is it, you know, You know, and is it like a stretch because you don't want, you don't want it to be easy. So that's kind of what I focus on, but I try and be, communicate that, but also listen and really understand what challenges that, that the folks are having, because if, if they're struggling, it doesn't really matter what I say, I guess.

And so I kind of, You know, in some ways it's more of the, more of the feeling sensitive side, which actually comes through, which is kind of hilarious given like where I came from. Yeah. Now tell us a little bit about your products. Yeah. So right now we're making air purifiers, so HEPA which were really popular during COVID because, you know, they're able to clean viruses out of the air and then carbon ones, which is new which I'm really excited about because they remove all the gases and VOCs, so, you know, [00:58:00] anyone that does any kind of, you know, painting or, you know, all kinds of smoking or their neighbor smokes to remove that, that's really effective.

But the key to all of that is the motor that we're making. And so right now we're, you know, making the air purifiers, making the motors. And then we're going to be branching out, you know, over later this year, next year, into some other product categories, just as more of a, you know, kind of, you know, not Dyson, but Dyson type products.

Oh, very good. Very good. Now, if somebody wanted to reach out to you, continue the conversation, check out your products, we're going to put links in the show notes, but what's the best way people could reach you personally if they want to ask a question or connect? Yeah, I'm on LinkedIn. So it's Peterman, M A N N.

And our website is Zoranci. com, O R E N S I. What's that name mean? How'd you come up with that? So it's a Finnish word that means orange. And so my grandmother, who was pretty [00:59:00] influential in my life, I didn't, cause I didn't talk about her. She came from, she grew up in Finland and came here. In the, to the US when she was 15 and you know, she was a nurse, very kind, but also funny.

Which is probably not typical for it to be funny and kind, but you know, that's kind of her mix and she was influential in my life. And orange is, you know, Syracuse orange. And so I kind of grew up around everything orange. And so I was looking for a name that was unique at the time. And I just put that in the Google translate.

I put orange and then I did it in Finnish and it, that's what came up and I'm like, all right, it's, it's available. I can trademark it and nobody has anything remotely similar, but it's, yeah. And it also means Orange's rejuvenation, which is kind of also, I kind of like that word and especially to help like my son and people with asthma you know, to, [01:00:00] to feel rejuvenated, to be able to breathe properly, you know, it's kind of a fundamental human function is breathing.

So, yeah. And so to me, it all kind of, kind of fit together. Yeah, I remember growing up as a kid and my close family friend, we called each other cousins, but we're just close family friends. And one of the children had extreme asthma, like you're saying, turned blue, be rushed to the hospital. It was terrible.

And I remember watching a couple of the episodes and being like terrified and you can't do anything. So it's nice that you focus on that and help clean the air. So there's at least less attacks or maybe even, you know, the triggers. Right. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, that's the big thing. It exactly, it is the triggers.

And if you can minimize that, it's kind of like having allergies. If you can minimize the allergens in the air, you're not going to feel it like, like you would otherwise. Yeah. And it makes anybody with allergies is tracking with you. If you don't have allergies, it's just, you don't know what you're talking about.

[01:01:00] Yeah. Be thankful. Yeah, so, okay, well, Peter, it's been a pleasure having you on the Remarkable People Podcast today. Is there anything else that we missed that you'd like to discuss or any final thoughts for our global community? Yeah, no, thanks. I appreciate you having me on. I would say, you know, when in doubt, just be kind.

Kindness goes a long ways and, you know, you never know what the other person's going through. So I would, you know, just default to being kind and assume that, you know, the best in the other person. Awesome. Awesome. Very good, my friend. So, ladies and gentlemen, thank you for joining us today. Like Peter said, be kind.

You know, God says, love him first and love each other second. And really, when we follow those two commandments, everything else falls into place. So, Peter, thank you for being on the show today, my friend. All right. Thank you. Yeah. Thanks for having me. Oh, it's been a pleasure. And ladies and gentlemen, like our slogan says, don't just listen to this great [01:02:00] advice Peter shared with you, Do it.

Repeat the good each day so you can have a great life in this world, but more importantly, an eternity to come. So, I'm David Pasqualone, this is our remarkable guest Peter Mann, and ladies and gentlemen, share this, comment on social media about it, give it to people you know it's going to help, encourage them, and we'll see you in the next episode.