Jacki Semerau Tait | Helplessness vs Hopelessness, Hanging in Through the Hard Times, & How Full Surrender Changes Everything

“I was doing everything I knew to do, and it wasn’t working. That is when I surrendered my life completely and everything changed.” ~ Jacki Semerau Tait

Guest Bio: Losing her house and her income sources, Jacki Semerau Tait NEEDED to recreate herself. Her “$4 Story” seemed like the lowest of lows, but became the catalyst needed to launch into her dream life. She is currently a top-producing Realtor® with a background in marketing and advertising. She has been using her expertise in real estate and marketing to coach real estate agents Nationwide to success in their career. Over the course of the last decade, she has coached hundreds of agents to create a successful book of business while helping them maintain a healthy work-life balance. As a speaker, she talks about mindset, motivation, and marketing and has shared the stage with Les Brown, Pedro Adao, Magic Johnson and more. Jacki’s life mission is to help people overcome their biggest struggles, stop self-sabotaging, and start living ON purpose IN purpose.

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• Website: https://realestatebyrelationship.com/

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Transcript

Jacki Semerau Tait | Helplessness vs Hopelessness, Hanging in Through the Hard Times, & How Full Surrender Changes Everything 

Helplessness vs. hopelessness, hanging in through the hard times, and how a real relationship with Christ and surrender changes everything, and the 4 was the catalyst. All this and more, right now. 

The Remarkable People Podcast. Check it out.

The Remarkable People Podcast. Listen. Do. Repeat. For Life!.

The Remarkable People Podcast.

Hello friends, welcome to this week's episode of the Remarkable People Podcast, the Jackie Semrel Tate Story. This week I actually almost cried three times during the episode. The episode starts slow because she's going through her past and [00:01:00] her history and the things that made her who she is, good, bad, or ugly.

During the story and today and then she transitions into how even during the hardest of times we can have joy and peace and love and it was bleak for her at times. There was trauma in her teens, there was depression, there was a failed marriage. There was going broke several times and being left with 4 in her purse and so much more.

So if you hang through the entire episode, you will be blessed. You will be inspired. If you don't know Christ, I hope it's a catalyst you coming to know Christ. And if you do know Christ, I hope it's convicting in a positive way. You know, convictions from the Holy Ghost. So hopefully this is convicting and a positive way to bring you even closer to Christ and help you heal in so many ways that I'll never know.

So at this time, get your pen and paper ready. Jackie is a [00:02:00] entrepreneur. She is a coach. She is a marketing and sales executive. She is into real estate and real estate investing. And she really is a remarkable woman. So get ready. for a remarkable episode that really could change your life. Also, before we start, I just want to say thank you to our sponsors.

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So the pots and pans were actually emitting chemicals while we were cooking. Sounds crazy, but spraying cologne, I had no idea how toxic that was. After spraying it, I'd hear the jasper go on in seconds. And the next thing I know, I'm like, whoa, This is a toxic odor. Do a little research, talk to my friends.

Sure enough, bad for us, right? Third sponsor, new, first time being on our podcast is Console Vault. Go to ConsoleVault. com And use the promo code again, Remarkable. You are going to get, I believe it's 10 percent off your order. And then you're going to sponsor the podcast at the same time. What's [00:05:00] ConsoleVault?

ConsoleVault is secure storage solutions. So basically if you have an armrest in your truck or SUV, a center console, it's a vault that goes in there. It screws into the frame of the vehicle simply by taking the old screws out, taking the, the tray out that's in there. Putting the console vault in, re screwing it into the frame, and then there's different types of either dimple key technology or passcodes.

There's all different ways they use to secure them. But now you get a safe, a vault in your vehicle, that unless people use a torch to get it open, it's not going anywhere. They literally have to steal your whole vehicle so they have time to get in your vault. Meaning, less thefts happen. You're Weapons, your cash, your jewelry, your wallet, whatever you don't want to take in to places.

You go to the grocery store, you go to the gym. Now you can lock it up with a passcode or a key and you are safe. So I love Consvault. I've been with the company for, [00:06:00] oh man, I want to say since 2007, maybe longer, actually it was longer, it was 2005. So check out mypillow. com forward slash remarkable, jasper.

com. Use promo code Remarkable. And now you're going to also have consolevault. com and use promo code Remarkable. All three, you win, you help us, you help the company, and we can continue the podcast to glorify God and help you grow. And at this time, this is exactly what we're going to do. Ladies and gentlemen, check out Jackie's Remarkable story and reach out to her and I, if we can help you in any way.

Enjoy.

[00:06:40] 4 INTERVIEW S9 RPP E918 Jacki Semerau Tait Helplessness vs Hopelessness Hanging in Through the Hard Times and How Full Surrender Changes Everything: Hey, Jacki, how are you today? I'm so good. How are you, man? I'm doing fantastic. Remarkable. Even I just told our listeners a little bit about you and your 4 story. And we're going to jump right into this. Cause I know everybody's waiting to hear your story before we do though.[00:07:00] 

If you have a first time listener or a serial listener that's been with us all four years and listened to every episode, if someone hangs through, they're going to get tons of gold they can apply to the life, I'm sure. But if you guarantee them one truth, one life hack, one powerful step they can take to change your life for the better, what are they going to learn in this episode?

Ooh, good question. If there's one life hack you're going to learn by the end of this episode, it is how to hang in through the darkest moments and what's waiting for you on the other side. Beautiful. So for someone to come to that, to be their number one lesson, that means something had to have to happen in your life to bring you to that point.

So let's start at the beginning. Everything that happens to us, good, bad, ugly, pretty, pretty ugly makes us the people we are. Where did your life start, Jackie? What was your upbringing like? So I actually was born and raised in a suburb of Chicago called [00:08:00] Elgin, Illinois. And my dad worked, he was a airline mechanic, aircraft mechanic for American Airlines.

And so he worked at O'Hare Airport and he worked the graveyard shift. So he was an overnight guy. So and my mom was a stay at home mom. I was the youngest of three, and my brother and sister are 11 and nine years older than me. So I am truly the baby, which, you know, was a blessing and curse, right?

All in one. But yeah, we were very, just, I would say, middle class, hardworking. My dad was a blue collar, and I learned, A lot about the power of family and the power of work ethic from my, from my parents, that was their obviously I would say the things they instilled in me, the thing I always say, I got the best.

of from my parents was a strong spiritual legacy. So they, [00:09:00] they definitely, they have a strong, strong faith in God. And so that was what my upbringing looked like. You know, we, we weren't people with, we weren't wealthy at all, but as a kid, I had no idea that, you know, when times were tough, I didn't know. My parents did a good job of hiding that from us.

So. Beautiful. Now with your birth, were you a happy little accident? Were you planned? They're just like, let's have one more. How did that work out? I was actually very planned. My parents wanted to kind of do a second family. They were young when they had their first two. And so, and my dad was in the Navy when both My siblings were born.

And so now my dad's at home. He has a stable, steady job. They wanted to do it again. They, they said they wanted to have a second family. So I was actually supposed to be the oldest of two in their quote unquote second family. And, so I [00:10:00] was, I was a toddler. My mom got pregnant again, and then she was actually four and a half months pregnant and she had a miscarriage.

And so they they took that as God's way of saying, no, you're done. So technically I do have a little brother. They named him Jedediah and that's what I know. So, no, I was not an accident. Beautiful. You know, the reason I asked that is because if someone is planned or not planned, that affects a lot of time, they're just mentality through life.

So I just wanted to see how that would play into it. So you were essentially, you had two older, you said sisters, but you were almost like an only child with that 10 year gap. No, an older brother and an older sister. So what have you, but yeah, then a nine year gap between my sister and I. Man, okay. All right.

So now you're growing up, you've got a nice family. You're in your teens. Where does life go from there? Well, when, so I was 10 years old when both my brother and sister got [00:11:00] married, moved out of the house. And so from 10 on, I kind of did live the only child existence in a way. And. Then when I was a sophomore in high school, my dad got transferred from the Chicago area to Phoenix.

And so we packed up and of course, I'm 15 years old. I have been born and raised in the same, you know, with the same friends, the same school the whole time. And so I was very bitter. I was a very bitter, angsty teenager when my, my parents moved me out to Arizona. But honestly, I can look back and say, that is.

One of the best things that probably happened to me at that time, I was not On a good trajectory, I had a lot of, a lot of things that happened. I mean, some of it is typical teenage, you know, going through the, going through the transition between junior high and high school and, you know, [00:12:00] going, you know, all the hormones and everything that comes with it.

And then some of it was traumatic events that happened as well. So I went through a lot of stuff. We'll just say my freshman year in high school. So when we moved To Phoenix, while I felt like the world was falling out from under me at the time, I can look back now and say, you know what? It actually gave me a second chance.

It gave me a chance to reinvent myself, to sort of hit the do over. I did go through a lot of depression and things trying to just make that transition. But overall, It was a very positive experience. And I met my best lifelong friends in my high school in Arizona. So it was a blessing. Very nice. Now, while you were in high school, were you able to overcome the depression or is that something you were able to work out later in life?

I worked that out later in life. Yeah. Okay. All right. So now you're in [00:13:00] Arizona. Things are changing for the better. Where does your life go from there? So when we basically I would say, well, let me, let me kind of back up a little bit. So while I was a kid, I was in ballet. Dance was everything for me. And so, when we moved to Arizona, I did start to go to the professional, the School of Ballet Arizona.

And so, that was a really interesting experience that made me look past ballet and maybe say, If you don't want just ballet, I want to put other forms of dance in there as well. Modern jazz, contemporary, that kind of thing. And so I started going to a different school then. So I decided I was going to major in dance in college, all of that good stuff.

Which I did briefly and then ended up leaving school, moving back to Chicago with the, with the idea that I [00:14:00] was going to audition for what's called the Ruth Page Foundation. And this is, a, a high level dance school that basically paves your way to becoming a professional dancer. And so I moved to Chicago with that in mind, and I have to tell you, I showed up first time they were having the auditions.

I decided, you know what, no, I'm going to wait. I'm going to wait till the next audition call. I'm, I, I need to get more flexible. I need to get more, more of this, better at that, what have you. Three times, I almost went to the audition and didn't. And then life circumstances happened. And I actually moved in with my sister to help her take care of her three kids because she had to go through a surgery, all this good stuff.

And I thought, okay, I'll sublet my apartment. I will go back. I never went back. So I'm 20 years old when all of this went down and I [00:15:00] experienced my truest and only regret in life. And what that taught me is that really the big regrets we have are the chances we don't take. So I never pursued a profession in dance after that.

I felt like I missed my opportunity. When I moved back to Arizona, I met my My first husband and we got married and I started going back to school at night and things like that trying to pick back up the ball for dance. But you know, I mean, with dance, that's not something that you can do later in life.

You have to take advantage of when your body will actually do the things. And so, you know, you say, so I missed that opportunity and I will say it's my only regret. But then from there, I ended up getting married, having two beautiful daughters and getting into real estate. And so that was sort of that little transition period took five, six years.

Beautiful. Yeah. And I don't [00:16:00] know a lot about ballet, nor do I pretend to, but I've heard like once you're 15, you're old, right? So doing 20, that would be like way beyond the age, correct? Yeah, even at 20 years old, that's late to get in the game. And honestly, that was part of what was going on in my mental, you know, in my mindset at the time, I kept saying, you know, all these other girls who are 15 and 16 and getting into it.

But I do think I had a little bit of a different perspective also because having had a brief period of time in college. With dance. I mean, when you major in dance, if you go through your four years of college, you'll be 22 when you get out and are pursuing those next steps. So I don't think I saw it as detrimental as maybe I would have had I not had that experience with college.

But Yeah, it, it was definitely part of my mindset. Like I had to be better because I'm already older than a lot of these other people that are going to be there. So. Yeah. And it's strange when you're in your [00:17:00] forties, you know, a couple of years is no big deal, but when you're in college, a couple of years just seems like forever, like a whole different class of people.

So I could see how, especially in the ballet industry, that would be so hard. So now you go and you help your sister. You move away from the ballet, you know, you're moving on with life, you get married, you have two children. Between your birth and that point, did we miss anything significant that'll tie into today?

Or do you want to pick up the story from there? Pick up the story from there. All right. All right. So anything, you know, this is all your story connecting with people and just helping them grow. So where does your life go from there? Well, so from there I will say, so I'm basically a stay at home mom at first.

And then I start to kind of tiptoe back into the workplace a little bit. But I would work part time when the girls were little, and I worked [00:18:00] for a credit agency. And so, you know, it was, 12 hours a week, no big deal, really just to get me out of the house and put me in with adults, the main goal. And then when my youngest daughter, after she was born, my ex husband and I were thinking about getting into real estate investing.

And so we started poking around, thinking about buying our first investment property. And the agent that we started to work with, I don't think she really worked with a lot of investors. And so she wasn't really able to guide us and we were new investors. We didn't know what we didn't know. And so I decided to go to real estate school.

Just to be able to get the knowledge I needed and to be able to represent ourselves for buying and selling our investment properties. Funny thing is, is that I absolutely fell in love with real estate. I fell in love with all of the moving pieces, the, the legalities of it, which is [00:19:00] crazy because, you know, again, I'm a creative.

So for all the legalities of real estate and all the little moving pieces to appeal to me. Is a little surprising or was a little surprising, but I got out of school and by the time I was done with real estate school and I got my license, I thought, you know, I actually want to do this. I'm going to do this for a living.

And so I did. I started working with clients. Right out of the gate. And funny, funny enough, my ex husband and I never did buy any investment properties, but I did get thrown into the, the industry that I've spent the last 22 years in. So I do love it. Nice. So that worked out well for you. So you're doing real estate.

You guys aren't buying any investment properties, but you continue, you transition your career to that. So when you're moving forward, you mentioned your ex husband, how did you go from your ex, your husband to your ex? And what was that transition like? [00:20:00] Sure. So we, the one thing that I will tell you, he and I agreed on is really, we were young.

We didn't know each other for long when we got married. And I think had we been a little more cautious and a little more intentional, we would have known we shouldn't get married, but got out other plans. And we have two beautiful daughters out of it, but the girls were young. They were three and five when we separated.

And. And so, yeah, I mean, basically, I became a single mom when the girls were really young. And so I did start to work for a title company at that time, again, still using my real estate knowledge, just doing a different perspective of real estate. And I worked as a special operations manager for their corporate office.

And Just to have more of a nine to five style job and bring in a more steady, steady check and, you know, [00:21:00] have things like benefits, that type of thing as a single mom felt that was important. So so I did that for a while and then. After doing that for, I think, about four years, then I went back into real estate sales as well.

And, so yeah, I mean, that was kind of that transition. What I will say is one of the stories, again, because we're here to try and get to that end goal. What I will say is, I mentioned the depression earlier. Not really anything I got over the depression. Significantly until I did become a single mom and part of that journey was before, before the girls, dad and I split up.

I mentioned I was a stay at home mom for the most part, and I was having a day where the girls were playing in their playroom, and I was laying in the, like, kind of across the hall watching them play, and I was laying on the ground just [00:22:00] feeling, just, I couldn't move, and I don't know if If you or any of your listeners have ever had that level of depression where you're just, life feels so heavy.

And that was where I was at. And I remember watching the girls play and feeling so heavy that I couldn't even sit up. And, My oldest daughter came over and she had like her little, they were having a little tea party and she had her little tea set and she brings it over and tries to pour me a little glass of imaginary tea.

And I remember just looking at her and not being able to engage. And she kind of looked at me and you could tell she knew something was wrong with mommy. She was trying to fix it in all of her, you know, four year old ways that you would try to fix it. And she couldn't. So I still remember the look on [00:23:00] her face when she kind of figured out like, you know, something's wrong with mom, but I'm not quite sure what.

And she walked away and just went back to playing with her sister. And I'm laying on the ground and tears are just, Pouring, you know, down, I'm laying this way and the tears are pouring down the side of my face, and that was a moment for me where I said, something has to change. I have to get, I have to get help.

And so I did start to go to a therapist at that point in time. And I think that was really life changing for me. And it really did start where my husband, my then husband, at the time, we started talking about our marriage. And so we wanted to get help for our marriage. And he said, And, you know, I mean, this was one of the things I do think he did right.

He said, you know, Jackie, you got a lot of stuff going on and I have a lot of [00:24:00] stuff going on. And he said, I don't think we need to get help as a couple right now. I think you need to start seeing someone and I need to start seeing someone. And I really grabbed onto that and I grabbed onto that opportunity and I found a wonderful A wonderful counselor.

I did go on antidepressants for a while as well. I worked with a both a psychiatrist and a therapist. And I think the one two punch of the medication as well as the cognitive behavioral therapy Really did help. It changed my life. It changed the trajectory of everything that came next. So I share that not because it's fun or comfortable to share, but I share that because I know there are people who struggle with mental health issues.

And I, I just want to say, you don't have to carry that weight on your shoulders all by yourself. It's okay to get help. [00:25:00] And Whether that looks like medication and therapy or just therapy, I would highly recommend never just medication. I don't think that's a good It's a good way to maybe stop the pain of the moment, but if you want to work through it and really change and come out of that, kind of go through that point in time where you, you know, like the caterpillar turning into the butterfly, you have to get into the cocoon for a while.

So that cocoon aspect definitely is when you're getting that help. If you want to come out as a butterfly, please make sure you're working with a team. That's helping you in multifaceted ways, not just one, one specific way or the other. Yeah, I couldn't agree more. I mean, if we're medicating problems, you got two major problems.

One, you're not dealing with the root [00:26:00] cause. It's just going to grow. And two, you can only medicate so long and you're going to need more medicine and more medicine, more drugs, and then your body's just going to break. Your mind's going to break. So I agree with you completely. So we have listeners all around the world, male and female, all countries, all cultures.

What were some of the specific things you can remember That you did, Jackie, your exercises, you know, everybody's situations different, but what were some of the things that really helped you at least act as a catalyst to your journey of healing? You know, I remember a few things that my counselor and I talked about together, went through together.

I will say that my counselor was faith based. I found her through my church. And I think that was really important because my. My belief in God, my, my specific Christian beliefs in Jesus Christ are a big part of who I am, [00:27:00] and I do think that that's important that if you're finding someone to help you to have someone who shares the same faith as you, I think is a very, very important part of who you are.

Important aspect because again, like you said, if we're just, if we're just looking at one aspect or the other, we're not taking a holistic approach. So one of the things I specifically remember was searching for somebody who could help me body, mind, spirit, soul, all of the, all of the things combined needed to be addressed.

And so I would say that's an important factor is taking that holistic approach. And so, so having her help me reframe the way that I thought of things, and that was specifically what I remember is she had this little, she would use her little blackboard in her office, and she drew this, you know, fork in the road.

And she really encouraged me that when [00:28:00] you have a thought, you can't help what that thought is when it comes into your mind. So that's the start of the why, but then you get to a crossroads where you can choose one way or the other. And one way of thinking is thinking all of the what ifs, the negative what ifs, like, okay, I'm going to take this thought and start really just spiraling downwards and feeling like a victim.

And Thinking of the worst case scenario. So that's one road you can go down, but the other road is the positive road of what is, so you take that same exact thought and go down the positive path. Well, but, but what could happen? What? You know, can you help this? And if the answer is no, you can't help this.

Okay, so what can you do with this? And taking that road of starting to retrain your brain to think positively. And I really appreciated that exercise she went through with me because I was 100 percent a victim mentality person. I was very much a person who was thinking of [00:29:00] all of the worst case scenarios, trying to protect myself from worst case scenarios.

You know, and again, I think a lot of this, she did also help me get to that root cause. And a lot of it was sort of wrapped up in the trauma of what I went through when I was a freshman in high school. So not really realizing that all of that spurred my, my thinking moving forward. So kind of helping me go back to that, those moments and understanding that those moments that happened, what, you know, wasn't, they weren't my fault.

And then how I responded to them, was a way of me just trying to put a bubble around myself to protect myself and understanding that that bubble was not serving me at all. And that's what she helped me to do. So she literally helped me visualize a stop sign at the fork in the road. And she said, you, you get to that point and you have one of these thoughts that come in your head, get to that point.

And I want you to consciously [00:30:00] make a decision as to which path you're going to go down. And that was life. That was game changing for me. Absolutely game changing. And, you know, here I am all these years later, 20 years later, and I can honestly tell you, I'm 100 percent a person who now has a positive mindset.

And the great thing about going through an exercise like that is that at first you do have to be cognizant of the choices you're making about the way that your thought patterns are going to go, but eventually you get to a point where it's no longer cognizant. It becomes second nature. And. So it is. I look back and go, wow, I mean, that really changed everything for me because my life outlook is completely different.

My thought patterns are a hundred percent towards the positive, not saying you don't have bad days or negative thoughts, just. Now it's how I'm wired. So it's possible to change that, that thought [00:31:00] pattern and behavior to get to a point where it becomes second nature. Yeah, and that's, that's, I'm so glad you were transparent about that because, you know, we start the show through your childhood and we go through your life and we bring it through today.

And that's the whole thing. All of us have been programmed at some point, good or bad. And like you said, you had trauma in your freshman year. We don't need to go into details, but that trauma carried through and contributed good or bad to your life. So now by you working with someone qualified, and I'm really glad you went to a same sex because counseling with the opposite sex is one of the most ridiculous things you can do in most circumstances.

If you take a vulnerable person and someone's counseling them, you know, so many times that goes south. So it's really great that you had that where you could drill back to the root, temporarily medicated to help you get through the day with your, you know, your life. But then you got off it. The goal wasn't to stay on it for life.

It was to get off it. Yes. So that's great. So now you're working with the [00:32:00] counselor. You're seeing growth and change. You're visualizing an actual stop sign. I can be the victim or the victor. Where does your life go from there? Well, so that's when I think, you know, everything started to, to shift into a whole.

I mean, I can honestly say, I think my thirties were just this amazing experience because I'm finally. Becoming a healthy person mentally, which of course affects everything else. And the way that I'm able to engage with my daughters and be fully present with them and, and everything like that. And so, I mean, from there, I would say I would go through the, like what I call it, my tale of two cities, the best of times, the worst of times.

So as a single mom, I was single for eight years and the first four years, I was very successful in. The ways the world says you need to be successful. I was successful financially and in my career and all of those things. And then the last [00:33:00] four years, I struggled financially, but again, it's again, the tale of two cities.

Those first four years, while I'm okay, financially, I'm going through this journey with my counselor and, you know, fixing that mental health component. And, and I don't know if that's the right thing to say, fixing it, but, but honestly, that's how I feel. I feel like the way that I was thinking. was broken.

And, and I do feel like it's fixed. And it'll never be perfect because, you know, we're human beings and we're not perfect people. We never will be. But that's okay. And so now being okay with the things that aren't okay, if that makes sense. But Then after that, I mean, it was kind of funny because I had maybe about a good year where all the, all the things were ticking.

I felt good. I was making good choices. My mental health was on track. My finances were good. And then all of a [00:34:00] sudden the great recession hit and it really hit me hard being in real estate. And I lost everything. And so in, in terms of, When I say lost everything, I mean, lost all of my worldly possessions.

I didn't lose my girls or myself or, or the love of God or any of that stuff. But I definitely, ended up having to short sell my house and moving in with my parents. And. You know, with my, my girls and my pride all packed up, I move in with my parents and I'm thinking, Oh, this is the temporary blip.

This'll just be for a couple of months. Let me get back up on my feet and I'll be off to the races and back to being self sufficient. But that wasn't how it worked. It actually got worse from there. And I ended up. financially worse, I should say. And for two and a half years, I lived with my parents and really struggled.

And so that brings us really to my 4 [00:35:00] story. That brings me to that point in time when. I'd already lost the house. I was already living with my parents. I'm trying to get back up on my feet. And part of that is, I have, I do have a background. I, I really did skip over my background in sales and marketing and advertising.

Which is part of what I went back into when the great recession hit. I kind of dusted that off and started working with small businesses again, with their marketing and, and things like that. I went back into the advertising aspect. So, I'm doing all these things trying to get back up on my feet and I'm working with these small businesses and, and helping them with their marketing, but they're also struggling.

Again, this wasn't a Jackie problem. This was a global issue that was going on. This [00:36:00] great recession was, you know, it was far reaching. And you're referring to 2008, 2009? 2008 2009. Yeah, and for our listeners around the world, I just want to fill in a quick gap. What Jackie's talking about, ladies and gentlemen, is America, a lot of corruption in the government, like a lot of countries, but they're letting banks have their own way.

They're letting people who had no business writing loans, write loans, take loans. Prices were inflating and we just got this giant economic bubble. Specifically in the real estate market, but all sectors, but really the real estate was the biggest because of just fraud from the government down and it popped.

And this is just one of the many stories, sadly, that Jackie's saying. So I don't know if that affected your country, but when America was a giant deal. Thank you for filling that in and you're right that, that was primarily an American thing and I do think it had some global reaching, but but [00:37:00] yeah, 100%.

I mean, America affects the world, but what I'm saying is just specifically, you were in the biggest sector of fraud, the biggest sector affected, you know, houses were selling overpriced for a million and then people were short selling for 200, 000. It was just a nightmare. It really was. I mean, the day that, so it was June 2008, the day that the stock market crashed.

And I can still remember at that time, I'm a single mom. I'm starting to feel struggle, but I've got a couple of deals in escrow with some buyers that I'm working with. And I'm like, all right, I'm going to be okay. You know, this will carry me forward. I'll be able to weather the storm. is what I thought.

And then when that day happens when the stock market crashed in June of 2008, both of my buyers pulled out of their, of their escrows. Both of them were like, whoop, all right. So I mean, because it did, it affected greatly their [00:38:00] financial situation as well. So I lose these two deals and now all of a sudden I'm like, oh no.

And now I'm like living on credit cards and no money in the bank kind of thing. And so. Anyway, that moves me forward to when I move in with my parents and, and all of that, thinking I'll get back up on my feet, working with different small businesses to help them with their marketing. And, you know, whether it's like little small tasks or jobs or taking on some bigger responsibilities with their marketing.

But the thing that, that happened is they're struggling too. They're also having to make decisions. I mean, I. We backtracked before I had to short sell my house. I can still remember my first missed mortgage payment. I still remember having to make that difficult choice of saying, do I pay the mortgage or do I put food on the table and keep the [00:39:00] lights on and the water running?

And so, you know, in that moment, you go, okay, I'm going to let the mortgage lapse for now, cause it takes longer for them to come after you. I'm going to put food in my kid's stomachs and I'm going to keep the lights on and the water running, for now. And, and that'll be enough and I'll get through and I'll catch up.

I can catch up. That was the thought at the moment. And then the next month comes around and you still can't catch up. And so now it just becomes like, okay, I, I have to let it go. And so anyway, so they're, you know, the companies I'm helping, they're making the same decisions. You know, do I pay payroll or do I pay the marketing girl?

Well, of course they're paying payroll. Do I, you know, You know, do my, do I do these accounts payable before I pay the marketing girl? Well, I mean, obviously you're going to keep the lights on and the employees fed. They're making the same choices. And so that's how I got to the point where I [00:40:00] had 4 left. So I wake up one morning, I checked my bank account, which became a daily thing.

Every day I'm checking my bank account to say, okay, where am I? How do I budget this? And I remember waking up that morning and seeing one of my bank accounts at a flat zero, another bank account overdrawn. And I look in my purse and I have four dollar bills. And I remember looking at these four single dollar bills going, this is all you have.

This is the extent of your worth. And yeah. So that, that to me is the low point where I'm going, I, I'm doing the work. I'm doing everything I think I need to do. And yet here I am, and I'm down to nothing and feeling that helplessness. But Not Hopelessness. So, I think that's a very key factor is [00:41:00] maintaining a level of hope even when you are in your darkest moment.

There's a very important factor to knowing that whatever you're going through in the moment, when you are down at the very bottom, knowing that you don't know how you're going to get through it. But you will get through it. You're going to come out on the other side. You're going to make your way through.

There was a there's a story Jim Lovell, who was one of the Apollo 13 astronauts, he tells a story in his book about, This moment where, and it's actually in the movie, Apollo 13 too. So Tom Hanks recounts this story as well. So you may have heard it, but where he's flying his, he's flying his plane and all of his instruments go out and he's, they're in a lot of fog.

There's all sorts of things going on where he's trying to land on an aircraft carrier, [00:42:00] and. He can't see in front of him. So he's flying strictly by instrument. Well, everything goes out, but in the moment where everything goes out, he's thinking, Oh my gosh, how am I going to land? How am I going to get out of this?

All the things I know to rely on have failed. But in that moment, he looks up and he looks through the windshield and he sees the, phosphorescence turning in the wake of the aircraft carrier. And so this path, it becomes a path and he's able to land on the aircraft carrier based on following that path.

And he made the point that you have to look up, you have to look beyond what you know is, you know, what you're typically relying on. You have to look up and you have to look forward. And that really resonates with me because I think that's the key in the moment when you're down, you have to look up, you have to look to the horizon of what's in front of you and know that whatever's going on, it's [00:43:00] going to be used.

in your story in some way. This is going to strengthen you. This is going to become part of your testimony, part of, part of your success story or, or whatever you want to call it. It's moving you forward. So I think that was one of the things that I learned in that moment is that you do, you have to look forward and know like, I'm going to get through this.

So I did though, I broke down in that moment and then said, okay. Now what? So, and I don't know, I feel like I'm just babbling on. I feel like I should be pausing. No, not at all. I do love what you said about how there's a massive, massive difference between helplessness and hopelessness. And for our listeners who've trusted Christ as their Savior, you know, Jackie and I have a relationship with Jesus Christ where we've trusted him to save us.

So whether it was physical [00:44:00] illness, depression, circumstances, hardship, betrayal, it didn't matter. Even though we were helpless at times and absolutely like, how are we going to get through this? Why is this happening? We always had the hope that God was there with us. And there's the verse in Romans, just one of many that talks about how all things work together to good for good to them that love God, to those that called according to his purpose.

So that's the hope that Jackie's talking about. And if you don't know that, reach out to me, reach out to Jackie. We'd love to tell you more, but it comes from a relationship with Jesus. And as for people, if you haven't trusted Christ as your savior yet. You can still think and pray about what Jackie's saying, how, yes, you are in a situation you maybe didn't cause, you have a situation where you have little to no control, but look at the hope.

It will get better. There is, God's a loving God. He doesn't [00:45:00] cause anything sinful or harmful. He only allows things to happen to us if it's going to better us in the future, for this life and eternity. So if something's happening, Satan's the scumbag. He's the one to blame, but God's there for you. Just hang on and listen to what Jackie's saying.

Keep moving forward. Look for the phosphorescence in the water and, and, and just keep moving forward. Because that hope. In Christ is what will anchor you and keep you in peace and joy and love even in the darkest valley. So Jackie, I don't want to cut you off, but that's something I feel like our listeners needed to hear.

Do you agree or disagree with that? I agree so wholeheartedly. In fact, it excites me that you, you brought that up because if I can just for a minute, I want to specifically talk about how God used that in my relationship with him. Number one, it's the most important thing in the world. Number two, this is your episode.

Well, it really [00:46:00] did. So, I mean, when I talk about this, And pause for one second, Jackie's about to tell you how losing everything and living with her parents turned out to be the best thing in her life for her relationship with God and her relationship in life. So let's just make sure we put that as the anchor premise, right?

Yes, yes, because let me tell you something. I mean, I told you I was born into a very faith based family and I feel so blessed that my parents were, raising me with a strong spiritual foundation, but I rejected that wholeheartedly when I was 15. I remember sitting on my knees in my bedroom and saying, no more God, I don't trust you because I feel like you let me down.

If you were real, you would have protected me from all these bad things that happened to me. And so I'm going my own way. And I [00:47:00] did. And I started to look at different faith I came back around. God started to call me back when I was 17 years old, but I'm stubborn and I'm a slow learner. So it took a while before I actually gave my life back to him.

And this was a big part of it because in this period of time, I mentioned I was being very financially successful for those first four years as a single mom. And I'm working on getting my. And I said, for about a year, I was living the life, right? Well, let me tell you what I was doing wrong. I thought it was all about me.

I thought I was amazing. I was awesome. I'm successful. Me, me, me, me, me. And you know what? That's not the truth. So as I'm walking in this path, I'm walking with one foot like, yeah, I believe in God now. Yeah, I believe in Jesus, but I'm not serving [00:48:00] Jesus. I'm not letting him in, in a real and personal way. And So going through what I go through next and being down to the bottom and at the, you know, my last 4, this is when I was like, man, I'm doing everything I know to do and it's not working.

And this was when I surrendered my life completely to Christ, because I, I laid in that bed and I said, God, you are bigger than money. Why are you letting this happen? And I felt it wash over me that he was trying to get my attention.

Sorry, this gets me, it gets me really emotional because You have to understand when you're down to the bottom of you, sometimes that's why God wants you [00:49:00] to reach out to Him, to know that He created you. He made you on purpose for a purpose. You can't do it all by yourself. It's not like God says, okay, I created you on purpose for a purpose.

Now go live your life. And you're like, Hey, thanks God. I got this, which is how I was living. God was like, no, no, no, no. I don't want you to walk. On your own, I want you to walk with me. I want you to have a personal relationship with me. And I look back on it now and I can say, you know what, Jesus loved me so much that he let me lose everything so that I would look up and look to him and walk into a relationship with him.

And to me, What greater love is there? And so, yeah, it was the best thing that happened to me, me being down to nothing. And what I can tell you is that in that moment [00:50:00] when I said, God, you're bigger than all of this. And then I had this realization that, you know what, I'm trying to do this on my own. How about I trust God.

Instead. Like, keep doing what you know to do, but don't trust yourself and your efforts. Trust in God. He's going to lead you forward. The joy, you know, the Bible talks about the peace that passes all understanding. And that is what filled me in that moment. I felt peace. Because I had no reason to feel peace, but I felt it.

I felt joy. I had no reason to feel joy. I was down to nothing. I was scared. I didn't know what to do next. But the joy of the Lord that filled me up and said, Oh, this is actually exciting. Let's see what you've got planned now. Okay, God, let's see how you get me out of this. Cause I can't get me out of this.

Let's see how you do it. And it became this amazing walk with God. And I want to say this too. In, in this moment, God put some things [00:51:00] in place that helped me through it. And we can talk about that in a minute, but I got through this moment and I started to get back up on my feet and I thought I was on that upward trajectory.

Whoop! Hit the worst. I'm done with it. We're going back into the upward trajectory. But I still had more to learn. And so I just want to encourage you that when you start to walk with God, It's a really powerful place to be, but it doesn't mean everything's going to get perfect. It doesn't mean all the fixes happen and now life is good and everything that happens next is just, you know, puppy dogs and rainbows.

It's not like that. And I still had to get down to another bottom, you know, sometimes it is what it is, but when you're trusting God, it's such a different experience. I just wanted to say that. No, I thank you for saying it in a hundred percent. And then as humans [00:52:00] in sinful nature, we can have these beautiful moments with God.

Ladies and gentlemen, if you haven't encountered him yet, I hope you do soon again. We're not God, but talk to Jackie and I will do our best to help you, but we can have these great moments and then go right back to our foolishness and, and all that joy stolen back again, right? But God wants us to have it every day.

So Jackie, now you're at home. You're at your parents home, not in your own home. You got two little girls looking up to you. Your parents are looking at you. You're looking at yourself in the mirror. You got 4, which can't even literally can't even buy dinner for you and your kids. Where does your life go from there?

Well, so that day I had a meeting. I was in a networking group and I had a meeting with someone in that networking group. And we were meeting at Starbucks and I still remember I would walk into Starbucks later that same day and I order a water. Cause there's no way I'm spending my last [00:53:00] 4 on coffee, even though I do love coffee, but it's not worth your last four bucks.

And I sit down and we have this meeting. Now this is a person who I'm in this networking group with. And. But this is a person who's also become a good friend of mine. And so as we're sitting there talking business, he goes, okay, what gives? And I, what, what are you talking about? And he goes, well, you're not yourself.

And I can tell something's bothering you. What's going on? So we don't share everything, but in this moment, As I mentioned, had been doing well. My kids were both going to private school. We move in with my parents and no more private school. Now they're going to go to public school. And when this story specifically happened, it was less than a week before school was supposed to start.

And so my kids who had worn uniforms to school, their whole [00:54:00] school existence, now I had to buy them school clothes. And I didn't have money to get him school clothes. And my parents had already, I mean, my parents, my gosh, they're so amazing. But again, we're not, we're not wealthy. We're just, you know, middle class people doing the best we can.

And so my parents had helped out already by buying the girls their school supplies, which was phenomenal. But, I didn't have money to buy the kids school clothes. And so I open up and I share this aspect. I say, you know, I've got these You know, I've got these invoices out, but they're not paid yet.

And I don't know when they're coming through. And I woke up this morning and I've got no money in my bank accounts. I'm overdrawn. I've got four bucks left to my name. So at this moment, he says, you know what? I want to help you out. And he gives me some money to go buy the girl's school clothes. And I'm, oh, thank you so much.

I'm going to pay you back. As soon as, as soon as these You know, bills get, or [00:55:00] as soon as these invoices get paid, I'm going to pay you back. And he said, I don't want you to pay me back. I want you to pay it forward. You are going to come to a place in the future where you're going to be able to help somebody.

And I want you to do it. And I mean, to me, that's one of the most awesome, things that somebody could have blessed me with in that time is to say, I'm going to help you with your physical need right now. And I don't need you to give it back to me. I need you to help someone in the, in the future.

Cause that also has become something that I'm very dedicated to and, and helping other people out. And that was one of the lessons is that you have to learn to look for the helpers. You know, Mr. Rogers is famous for saying, look for the helpers. There are always helpers. And I think as human beings, we tend to want to be very self sufficient.

And I think this is especially true in the United States. I think we tend to think, you know, we can do it all, be it all, have it all. And we could do it all by ourselves. We don't need [00:56:00] anybody. So not true. So not true. We do need others and it's okay sometimes to reach out to somebody else and accept their help.

It's hard to accept help. We have to swallow our pride in order to do it. But I did accept his help. Took the girls shopping for school clothes and even had enough left over to take them for ice cream cones at Baskin Robbins at the end of the day. And I just remember it being so neat because we weren't able to do stuff like that.

So taking the girls for ice cream, they were so excited. And and so, yeah, it was great. And then, you know what? It got me through that period of time. Those invoices got paid not that far into the future. I think it was maybe a day or two after that, that the first invoice came in and you're, you know, I was able to move forward, in that situation.

But yeah, it was a, it was a [00:57:00] terrifying moment, but packed with so much that I needed, you know, to get me to the end of me, a lot of lessons that I needed in order to move forward. Excellent. Excellent. Yeah. And I always found it interesting. I feel like, and again, I'm coming from an American mindset. It seems like people that I've known through my life are polarized in asking for help.

They're either, they don't want to do it. And it's like, no, no, no, no, no. Or they have this entitled mentality where it's take, take, take, take, take. There's not many people who have a real balance on it. So it's cool that God was showing you that, you know, you can take and you can give and it's okay. We're here for each other.

You know, we're, it's, it's part of the process of humanity and how God made us. So that's really interesting. So from there now, where does your life go, Jackie? Well, so from there, I'm [00:58:00] able to, get back up on my feet. I actually connect with a A really great opportunity. I worked with a couple of tech startups as their community manager.

Which was awesome. And also still trying to think like, okay, do I want to get my feet underneath, back underneath me in real estate? And so I'm kind of doing the stuff behind the scenes to get my feet back underneath me in that direction. And at the same time, start working with this. These tech startups and it's enough that I'm able to get back up on my feet and I'm get my girls and I move into a three bedroom apartment and I still remember how this three bedroom apartment felt like a palace after, you know, I mean, and I remember we took the very first night we went over there and you know, I had put all my stuff in storage when my house went, when, you know, I moved out of the house, I put all my stuff in storage.[00:59:00] 

And so. We, you know, go over there the first night and we had, the girl's mattresses on the floor and we put the two mattresses together and the three of us sleep on these mattresses on the floor and then the next day everything gets delivered and it was just like the coolest thing because we're like, this is ours, we're in our own place.

And, and so that was a really. Amazing experience and then getting everything set back up. But in that period of time, I did take my eye off the ball in real estate a little bit, thinking like, okay, I really want to focus in on doing this stuff for the, these tech companies and, and moving that forward.

And then we lost our funding. And then that was it. And I was doing still some side projects and honestly, like everything just within a two week period of time, I just, everything was [01:00:00] gone. My, in terms of sources of income that I had been counting on. And so now it's like, okay, here we go again. We got to reinvent.

And so this is when I go through it again, you know, like I said, I got to, you know, it wasn't like it was all uphill. I go through it again. And this time it's different because when you get foreclosed on in a house, you know, you stop making your mortgage payment, it takes a few months before the bank says we have a problem and they start to reach out to you.

And then once they go through the foreclosure, like from the minute they put you in the pre foreclosure aspect, you know, you have 90 days at least and all these things, you can make the thing and short sell the house and get approval. It's a long process. Eviction from a rental is. Fast and Furious. And so, I'm, I fall two weeks behind on my rent.

I wake up New Year's Day with the flu. And I mean, like, [01:01:00] and I, like, and it's so funny, I tell this story and they're like, you sure you weren't hungover? No. I was home. I was with the kids. It's not like, you know, I party too hard or anything on New Year's Eve. I wake up New Year's Day and I'm just riddled with the flu and I can't pay my rent.

So I'm like, oh my gosh, here we are Again, but I start going through it again. I start reaching out to I'm, I mean, I, I can still remember cause I'm not afraid to cold call people. I've been in sales, you know, my whole life. It's okay. So I just, I start hitting the phones. I'm hitting the emails. I'm hitting my network.

I'm searching for any and every opportunity I can. And, You know, so here it goes. And I, five days after missing my rent payment, I get a knock on the door with the notice of foreclosure or not foreclosure, eviction on my, on my front door. [01:02:00] And so like the clock is ticking and I'm going through it, but here's where it gets different.

So now I do have this faith and this trust in, in Jesus and I have a real working relationship with him. And so I am praying every day. I'm doing the work, but I'm also praying every day, God, fix this. God, help, help me get a job. God, help me get a marketing client. God, help me get a real estate client. God, help me get an opportunity.

I'm praying for all the things and it's just not happening. And I remember being to the point where I'm like, okay, once again, I'm doing all the things that I know to work. And now this time, I think I'm like, you know, laying it all on God and having that faith and trust. And I remember getting down to my knees and going, Oh my gosh, I'm praying the wrong prayer.

And I said, God, what if I need to go through this? What if homelessness? Cause Oh, backtrack for one second. [01:03:00] Now my parents have sold that house and moved into a retirement community. And I no longer have the option to move in with mom and dad again. No safety net, no plan B, no backdoor. Done. Gone. And I'm literally like, wow, I'm, I'm facing real homelessness.

And I go, okay, you know what, I'm on my knees in my living room floor, praying, crying, and realizing, I said, you know what, God, what if homelessness is what you need me to walk through in this period of my life? In order to bring you glory. What if that's what needs to happen? And I got up again, filled with so much joy because I surrendered it.

I said, okay, God, where do you got to take me? I'm here for it. Is homelessness what we need to walk? I'm here for it. What, what do I need to lose the apartment? Do I need to lose everything yet again? Okay, let's do this. And I get up [01:04:00] with like excitement. I'm like, all right, here we go. Let's do this. What does this look like, God?

And and then it was, shortly after that, like maybe a day or two again that I ended up getting connected with a job opportunity that Married both my marketing and my real estate and I started working for one of the larger mortgage companies in town and helping a few of their loan officers with their marketing and was able to use my coaching.

So when I was with the title company, I would coach realtors in terms of how to be successful and all that good stuff. So I got to use that coaching again for, you know, working with realtors again, but on behalf of the mortgage company. And so, you know, again, it was an exciting time and, you know, you fast forward to now when we moved to Flagstaff [01:05:00] and I knew nobody and I thought, okay, this is the perfect opportunity where I get to see all these things I'm coaching other people on in terms of real estate.

I'm just going to put my money where my mouth is and I'm going to see either I'm going to prove that everything I'm saying works. And we're going to watch it happen. And I'll have, I'll use myself as a case study, or we're going to see that everything I've been coaching other people on doesn't work, I'm full of garbage and I better figure something else out to do for a living.

So, I mean, the good news is it did work and here I am. And I know I just hit the fast forward button on the story, but I think it's. It's an amazing and powerful aspect because this was the last time I got down to, you know, literally nothing. And so I've been blessed ever since, but but yeah, I had to go through it again.

Beautiful. And we're gonna, we have to talk about one big point. You did hit fast forward, which [01:06:00] is totally fine, but you are remarried now, correct? I am remarried. So where, where, where does that fall in the fast forward phase? Okay, good question. So honestly, he was a part of all this story. He kind of saw it happen.

We started dating in 2007, and then we were very on again, off again, again. Remember, I was one foot in, one foot out. And so we had a very worldly relationship. He was not You know, he was raised Catholic, had a faith in God, but in the period of time when I met him, he was very not engaged with God at all.

And so I look at what happened during this period of time and how his life overlaid with the things that I was going through at the same time. And what we both have in common, what we talk about now is how during this period of time, we were both living very. Selfishly. And then God [01:07:00] brought us to a point where we were, we realized it and surrendered fully to him.

So we were on again, off again for a few years. And then we finally, I was like, I'm done with you. We're out. Everything. And during this period of time when we weren't having any communication, is when God brought me completely to surrender. And on his side, and I won't get into his story, but it's an amazing one as well, but on his side of things, God brought him to full surrender as well.

So when I go through this period of time that I just described where I'm like, okay, God, if I got to walk homelessness, let's do this. This was January, 2012. And so I get this job, I don't have to walk through homelessness. I should, I should finish that piece of the story where I am now. I pay my rent, I catch up, I'm able to keep the apartment.

And about a month after that. He reaches out to me, Mark reaches out to me, and and he, let me say this, he'd [01:08:00] been poking the bear a lot, for like, he'd be, reach out, hey, let's get together for lunch, hey, let's get together for dinner, hey, can I treat you to coffee, a drink, whatever, and I was like, no, I don't want anything to do with you, you're gone.

So he sends me a Facebook message, of all things, And says, Hey, it's time. Let's get together and talk about Jesus. And now I go, well, this, I got to hear. So we do, we get together for dinner and we get all caught up. And I hear about how he's completely surrendered his life to Jesus. He hears about how I've completely surrendered my life to Jesus.

And the amazing thing is, is that this meeting. I go, wow, I think, I think I'm like, I think I can just be friends with this guy. Because before he just, I was so in love with him and I always thought we were going to get married and all these things. So now I'm like, I released any [01:09:00] expectation. I went, no, I think we can just be friends.

I'm healed. This is good. He, on the other hand Yeah, I'm laughing as a guy because guys and girls can't be friends. That's like, ridiculous. Everybody knows it deep in their heart, but go ahead with the woman side of this. Well, it's the when Harry met Sally thing, right? It's just guys are patient and they, if they love you, they'll just continue on.

Even if they see you making stupid decisions, but guys and girls can't be friends. You know, I joke. We can go the details, but Not, you can be acquaintances, but not like, oh, this is my best friend. It's like, dude, he loves you or she loves you. Get together and get out. I think you definitely have something to that.

I, yeah, like I'm thinking we're good. We can be friends. And he leaves that same dinner going, I'm going to marry that girl. I'm going to marry her. To which then of course, like we, we both, like he treads lightly and goes [01:10:00] slowly because there's a lot of damage done. There's a lot of water under that bridge.

And so I think we're healing and becoming friends. He thinks we're healing. And he, you know, he's, Regaining my trust, I guess. And so we do, we get to a point where and so that was in February. In September, we have the conversation where he's like, I think we should, I think we should talk about you and me.

And I'm like, Oh, ha ha ha. Yeah. We're good friends. Yeah. You and me. Yeah. High five, buddy. And he's like, no, no, no. I mean like doing this for real. I was like, wait, what? And I literally, you know, that moment where you think like something that you think you want for a long time, and then all of a sudden you can get it.

And you're like, I don't know. I don't know that I really want this. I know. I'm not sure. And so so we decide, we kind of start to Talk about it seriously. We're not engaged yet. We're talking about it seriously. [01:11:00] We're really doing it behind the scenes. We're not telling our family or friends because again, a lot of water under that bridge.

So we know the advice we're going to get is going to be very skewed on the past, but we're both moving forward knowing that we want to do this. honoring Jesus, putting Jesus first, or, or, or it won't work. Yeah, you're changed. You're both changed people. We are both changed people. So we're really coming at it from that perspective.

So we do, we end up we end up getting engaged and then we get married. So we get engaged over Thanksgiving and we get married January 12th. So six week engagement. And so what we ended up doing is we thought we were going to have an engagement party at a friend's house. And then we were going to get married at the church.

And the whole get married at the church at the time, we went to a mega church. So it was like, Oh, there's a lot of rigmarole you got to go through. And then you had to wait for all these different dates and you don't even know which pastor is going to marry you and all sorts of stuff. [01:12:00] Yeah. Totally unpersonal.

Yeah. I don't like that. It really wasn't it wasn't the experience we thought we wanted it to be necessarily. And so, So we ended up doing a surprise wedding. We reached out to the pastor from the, you know, smaller church that we had gone to while we were dating earlier, who knew us both really well.

And so he agreed to marry us. And so at the, at the engagement party, we kind of do a little thing where we're on stage and we're talking, you know, to each other on stage. I call it stage. It's a big raised patio area in the backyard. And he wrote me a song. So he sings the song and then he says, you know, I can't wait to marry this woman.

In fact, I really can't wait to marry this woman. And he's like, Hey, Randy, Randy, are you here? Pastor Randy, who married us. And Randy is like, Oh, I'm just, I'm eating. I, what do you want? And he's like, Hey, would you marry us? Of course we had it planned all along. [01:13:00] He goes, yeah, sure. I guess I can marry you guys.

And so we had a friend who sang a song and while she sang the song, I went back, put on a wedding dress. The girls walked me up the aisle and we got married. That's awesome. It was really, it was very cool. And we had about a hundred people there and, and people who had known us in various ways and over the years, and they were shocked and it was so much fun.

So I've never heard of that. That's so cool. It was neat. And it was, you know, like, because we just wanted to get married and start living our life together and honoring Jesus. And that was what we. That was our heart. And so it was great because we were like, you know, as an engagement party, we told people not to bring presents.

A few people did, but I mean, so it wasn't about presents. It wasn't about pomp and circumstance. It wasn't about any of those things. I think the only thing we spent any real money on was the catering and the food. That's it. So good. So between that date and today, bring us up to date [01:14:00] Jackie on, on anything else we missed before we transitioned to where are you today?

Where are you heading next? And how can we as a remarkable community help you get there? Awesome. Well, I, so we lived in Scottsdale, Arizona at the time. And so we were married for about a year and a half. Let me say this. We, I had this whole time I had shared custody with the girl's dad. So they would do a week on a week off.

So I'd have them for a week. Then they'd go to their dads for a week. And he went through some hard stuff as well. And so Mark and I are married for three weeks. When I get the call from my ex husband and he goes, Hey, kind of had some stuff happen. I'm not gonna be able to take the girls for a while.

I needed, I need to go do this stuff over here. And so we became full time with the girls having married three weeks, we've become full time and which honestly [01:15:00] is like the biggest blessing because it really did bond us as a, as a family. And and it was, it was absolutely amazing. And so we were blessed in that way.

So the girls were 11 and 13 when we got married and, we're able to move forward as a family. Well, so then we're married for about a year and a half and Mark gets an opportunity. We're both in real estate and he knew a builder, had been talking to a builder, had built with a builder in Flagstaff. Yeah.

A while ago. And so they kind of approached him and said, Hey, why don't you come work for us? And he, he was bored with residential real estate, you know, doing it, what he'd been doing for, you know, so many years. And so he goes up and goes, I'm going to take the lunch. Why not? You know, it never hurts to take the lunch and see what people have in mind.

So he calls me and he goes, Jackie, I think this is a great opportunity. And he tells me about it and he goes, so I don't know. What do you think? Should we move to Flagstaff? And I go, yeah, let's do it. [01:16:00] We're both, we're, we're both very adventurous, I would say. And and so I think he was shocked that I said, yeah, let's do it.

But we did. So we moved to Flagstaff, Arizona, which is a mountain town. It's two hours North of Phoenix you know, and 5, 000 feet in elevation. So we're at seven, we're at 7, 000 feet elevation in Flagstaff where the Scottsdale Phoenix area is around 2, 000. So. We're up in the mountain town of Flagstaff, Arizona, and this is when I get the chance to really reinvent myself as a, you know, as a professional.

And like I said, say, all right, either what I coach and teach works or, or it doesn't. And so the good news is I definitely proved that it worked. And so have had a very blessed career have been, you know, top 1 percent in our brokerage nationwide for the last five years running. I run a team now. I have a business partner, Stacey at Ehrenreich, and I, we, we have a team [01:17:00] together.

And and so now we're covering kind of that Northern Arizona area selling real estate. And that's been amazing. And then, I also picked up my coaching again. And so I've been coaching with my brokerage, training our new agents for the last four years and I love it. And so I also do a coaching program for agents nationwide and and we, I do group coaching pods.

We'll do them, they're three months at a time. And so it's, it's been awesome. So that's where I'm at today. Beautiful. So if somebody wants to get in touch with you, continue the conversation, learn more, talk with you about coaching, what's the best way to reach you? So if you're specifically interested in the real estate coaching, you can go to the website BuyReferral.

com and you can download our, the, I've, I've got a four step guide to [01:18:00] working with your sphere of influence. You can download that and then you'll get put in the loop for coaching and things like that. Anything else you want to know, you can go to StepsToStrength. com and that'll take you anywhere.

It'll, you know, the stories I've shared with you today, I've written in a couple of different books. So you can buy the books there. You can connect with the coaching. You can connect with me as a real estate agent and you, you can connect with me and my husband. We do a YouTube channel called Empty Nester Life.

So you can even connect with that there. So lots of ways to get in touch with me, but yeah, that's all at StepsToStrength. com. Awesome. And we'll have all those links in the show notes as usual, ladies and gentlemen. Well, Jackie, between your birth and today, is there anything we missed in your story or any last words you want to share with us?

You know, there's always a lot of moving pieces to the story. I will say that a hundred percent. The, I think the parting word I would love to leave you [01:19:00] with is just to know and understand that you're going to go through hardships. As a human being, it's part of the human experience. You're going to suffer.

You're going to go through hardships. Know that The, the hardships, the suffering, all of that stuff, it's not optional, but how you get through it is. And even in the moments where you do feel helpless, you don't have to be hopeless. And I know David and I both shared our extreme faith in Jesus. And I think that is the key to the human experience is that I think God wants a personal relationship with you.

And I think that Jesus is the way to get there. And I'm happy to discuss that with you in any way, shape, or form. But even if that's not something that you personally are connecting with right now, there are still things that you can connect with to get you through those hard times. And get you moving [01:20:00] forward.

You don't ever have to be helpless. You don't ever have to be so at the end of your rope that you just want to exit the human experience altogether. God's got a plan for you and you are created. On purpose, for a purpose. And I just would encourage you to lean into that and find that purpose and live on purpose, not just getting through the day and going through it by accident.

That's, if there's anything I can leave you with, that's what it would be. Amen. I don't think there's a better way to leave it. So thank you so much, Jackie. And ladies and gentlemen, like our slogan says, don't just listen to great information that Jackie brought you, Do it. Repeat it each day, so you can have a great life in this world, but most importantly, an attorney to come.

So, my name's David. Reach out to me if you need help. This is our remarkable friend, Jackie. Jackie, thank you again for being here today. Thank you so much for having me. It's been a pleasure. Oh, [01:21:00] likewise. Ladies and gentlemen, Share this episode with your friends and family, those who need it. Apply it in your own life.

I'll apply it in my life. Jackie's going to apply it in hers. It's a constant growth, constant moving forward, keeping that balance on life. But remember, as soon as you have balance, ain't always trying to shake the cart, right? So kick him in the face and get back to enjoying the life God has for you. So Jackie, again, thank you.

Ladies and gentlemen, we'll see you in the next episode.