The Combination Lock of Success, Taking Action in Your Life, & the Best Way to Grow Your Business | The Ben Albert Story

"The mistakes we made in our past, don’t have to define our future.” ~ Ben Albert

Guest Bio: When Covid hit, Ben was furloughed from work. He found himself down and out, staring at an empty handle of Jim Bean Whiskey. He was unemployed, depressed, and felt unworthy. Hesitantly, he opened his Macbook and started reaching out to strangers on Linkedin. This spearheaded his entrepreneurial journey. The rest is history. Now Ben hosts a network of 5 podcasts called “Real Business Connections,” runs a massively successful marketing firm, Balbert Marketing, and has replaced his established sales income in just over a year. Ben found his way. Once an underdog, now a successful entrepreneur, Ben is passionate about helping other underdogs find their way, unlock their Combination Lock of Success, and achieve their dreams. Ben is on a mission to actually move the needle on one million lives, one conversation at a time.

SHOW NOTES: 

• Website: https://realbusinessconnections.com
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/realbusinessconnections/
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/realbenalbert/
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/realbenalbert/
• Additional Quotes:
  • “The more hands you shake, the more money you make.” ~ Brad Lea
  • “There’s no key to success, it’s a combination lock.” ~ Ben Albert
  • “Be it, until you become it.” ~ Ben Albert

 SHOW NOTES: 
~Website: https://realbusinessconnections.com
~Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/realbusinessconnections/
~Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/realbenalbert/
~LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/realbenalbert/
~Additional Quotes:
     ~“The more hands you shake, the more money you make.” ~ Brad Lea
     ~“There’s no key to success, it’s a combination lock.” ~ Ben Albert
     ~“Be it, until you become it.” ~ Ben Albert

REMARKABLE LISTENER SPECIAL OFFER(s):

• N/A

CORE THEMES, KEYWORDS, & MENTIONS:

• no key to success, finding your unique DNA code, mentors, peers, action, do, premature birth, immaturity, feeling not good enough, the wrong crowd, marketing, the right advice, feeling like you don’t belong, alcoholism, died from a broken heart, scars, struggles, wearing a mask, music promotion, marketing, third party referrals, referral marketing, power of reviews, asking for reviews, negative limiting beliefs, taking action, curiosity, self discovery, drinking, alcoholism, underage drinking

For more Remarkable Episodes, Inspiration, and Motivation, please visit https://davidpasqualone.com/remarkable-people-podcast/. Enjoy!

Transcript

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The Combination Lock of Success, Taking Action in Your Life, & the Best Way to Grow Your Business | The Ben Albert Story

Taking action in your life, the combination lock of success and the best way to market your business. All this and more, right now.

Hello friends! Welcome to this week's episode of the Remarkable People Podcast, The Ben Albert Story. Ben is the host of Real Business Connections. He has his own marketing firm and you've heard of him probably on many shows that he's been interviewed on. Maybe you've checked out his podcast, but in this episode you're not only [00:01:00] going to get a practical look, but at taking action our lives and not looking for keys and shortcuts and hacks to success, but understanding that success is a combination lock and it's part of our journey to unlock it and to harness that power and apply it to life.

But what you're also going to hear is part of Ben's story, more of an autobiography of sorts of his life. So you can see not only the man he's become today, but a little bit of how he got there, how you and he maybe have many similarities. And then we get to the end of the episode where you can connect with Ben and both hopefully move forward in life and become more prosperous and joyful.

And thriving for your benefit in the glory of God. So get ready for this great episode with our friend, friend, Ben Albert. And also don't forget to thank our sponsors by utilizing promo code remarkable at mypillow. com. Not only are you going to get up to 80 percent off your [00:02:00] purchases, 300 plus products at mypillow.

com, you're going to get 25 to 80 percent off. You are helping an American owned business that's employee owned, and you're also helping the podcast. Cover our expenses so we can keep bringing you great stories of remarkable humans so you can thrive. So it's a win, win, win, win, win for everybody. So check out mypillow.

com, use promo code remarkable. But before you go there, check out this great episode with our friend Ben. And get ready, he has four or five quotes that are hard hitting and truthful that you can apply just those, let alone all the other nuggets of gold he gives us along the way. So we thank you for being here, we love you, we can't wait to hear you, from you, and enjoy this episode with Ben Albert, now.

[00:02:47] EPISODE RPP S9 E902 Ben Albert 6 Nov 23: Hey, Ben, how you doing, brother? I'm doing fantastic, David, dude. Honor to be here with you. This is going to be fun. Oh man, it's, I'm looking forward to it. I just told our audience a little bit [00:03:00] about you.

They don't even know the whole story and what they're in for. So for our new listeners, we have serial listeners been with us, listen to every episode, maybe with us the whole four years. But some people, this is their first exposure to Remarkable People Podcast, and now they're getting to meet you, Ben. So if you were going to promise them If you stick through this episode, you're probably going to get a ton of gold nuggets, but I guarantee you're going to get at least this one nugget that you can apply to your life and change for the better.

What would that be? Wow, one nugget. You know, my go to is there is no key to success. There's no key to fulfillment. There's no specific key. It's a combination lock. And similar to a padlock at the gym, each and every one of us has our own unique combination. We have our own unique DNA code. That's why they take your fingerprint when you get in trouble, right?

They take your fingerprint because we're unique. We have a unique fingerprint. So this could be part of your [00:04:00] combination. I know that a lot of the episodes that David's done here on this podcast are part of that combination. If you're a frequent listener, but my main point here is that we need to extract the wisdom and learn from mentors.

We need to learn from peers, but more than anything, we need to take that knowledge and put it to action. So if either of us say anything today that sparks a little bit of interest and joy, I invite you to go take action and continue to build that unique fingerprint of your business, your life, your faith.

And we're just, you know, blessed to be a part of it. So I'm excited. Thanks for putting me on the spot. I hope that's a good way to start. Amen, man. No, that's what we want. A summary of what they could be in for. They're going to hear a story. You may say something just in conversation that means nothing to you, but man, it could be a life changer for so many of our listeners around the globe.

So thank you, Ben, for that summary. And what's crazy is that you line up already with our slogan. [00:05:00] Don't just listen to the content Ben says today, but do it, repeated the good stuff each day. So you can have a great life in this world, but most importantly, an eternity to come. So Ben, you believe this, you teach this, this is your passion and it's your profession.

Let's start at the beginning of your life, though, because everything that happened to us in life, good, bad, ugly, and pretty, pretty ugly, makes us the men we are today. So where were you born? What was your upbringing like? So let's start off the show with who, who has been. Yeah, I was born and raised in Rochester, New York, still live in Rochester, New York.

So definitely a hometown boy to my city. Love it here. And, I was born premature and they didn't think I was going to make it. So I actually spent the first two weeks of my life. One of those feeding tubes, surgery didn't get to spend it in my, you know, parents arms. So I guess that was my biggest trauma that I didn't even know about it.

I can't remember these moments, but things happen like that in our life and they define who [00:06:00] we become. And to be honest, man, I was immature a lot of my life. I got in with the wrong crowds. I was shy. I was, I would make myself small because I wanted to hide from attention pretty much my whole life, man.

I, I, I didn't feel like I was good enough and I don't know if it started from barely making it into this world, but I was blessed enough to make it and I was blessed enough to realize that a lot of those mistakes, a lot of getting into the wrong groups. Following the wrong advice, getting into trouble with the law, doing things and screwing up.

Is exactly what prepared me to ma to the for, to be the man I get to be today, to be the, the human I get to be today. I've got scars that I can share with people that since I have experienced it, I do my best to ensure other people don't have to go through that crap as well. And like what I do for a living is marketing, which [00:07:00] is really just highlighting great people.

But I think it all started. with wanting to be better, realizing I was going in the wrong direction, then I realized what happened when I, when you learn from the right mentors, when you follow the right advice. And now, you know, one of my goals is to be one of those mentors to give that advice. So that's a little deeper than you asked, but that's a big part of how I was born, man.

I screwed up most of my life. But I'm just learning how to be better and I'm helping as many people as I can. Yeah, no, and that's what we do. We actually go into specifics sometimes and drill down. So you can go as overview, you can go as deep or as shallow as you want. It's your life, it's your story. I can't go shallow, just so you know.

I'm not good at shallow, man. I want to keep it real for you. Yeah, no, man. So... Let's do this. You were born mom, dad in the house. What was the situation there? Uncle, grandfather, cousin, orphanage? How did you grow up? Yeah, I had my [00:08:00] parents parents and a brother. So very, you know, typical situation. Two parents.

Married, a brother, a dog, a fence in a backyard. So it was decent. I talk about it. I usually don't get deep into these topics, but I didn't realize this when I was younger. And I feel like part of why I felt like I didn't belong is cause I didn't feel like I fit in at home. And I don't think it was intentional.

But my father had a pretty bad drinking problem and he ended up drinking himself to death, passed away in 2016 at a very young age. And my mom, I, I like to say she died from a broken heart because, you know, it's tough being a widow in this world, but she was struggling with a neurological disorder, multiple sclerosis.

Pretty much my entire life. So she had a little bit of a neurological disorder. My dad was ruining his own [00:09:00] neurology, neurology by drinking. And so it was interesting because from the outside looking in, we looked great, but you know, we all have scars and we all have struggles and, I realized that I can wear a mask and pretend like everything was perfect.

But once in a while, you got to take that mask off, whether it's joining AA, whether it's talking to a friend, whether it's just stop doing the crap that's hurting you, I've realized, you know, things aren't always perfect, but we can make them better. Yeah, 100%. And now during this, you know, nobody knows what goes on behind closed doors.

Like you said, a family looks quote unquote perfect and they're a mess. There's other families that look like a mess, but they're honest, they're real, and they're up front, and they're great. You know what I mean? It's, it's just, just, it is what it is. As long as you're honest and real before God, that's what matters.

But how did this affect your, was your brother close to you? Like older, younger? Were you guys [00:10:00] separated from this? Like, what was that relationship like? Yeah, my brother was, he's my older brother two and like three quarters. So three years, it just depends. My birthday comes before his, but three years older.

And he was one of those saving graces in my life where he, he got me obsessed with music. He was a played bass. He was big into music. His friends started playing in bands around high school, middle school. And that's where the first time where I really felt like I found a tribe, I found a community.

It was in the music industry and it's, it's a beautiful part of my journey because. My brother was giving me these burnt mixtapes and odd, interesting bands, everything from like underground rappers to progressive metal bands, like Dream Theater that just won a Grammy, which is crazy. But he was giving me these mixtapes and then I got obsessed with music and then I started to go to his shows and then.

Some of my buddies started a play and [00:11:00] we started a jam. And years down the road, high school, I started handing out flyers and then college came about and I started a music podcast and I started booking bands. And all of this happened, me becoming like a promoter and advocate for like music before I actually understood was what marketing was.

And, you know, as a 32 year old adult, I host a podcast and run a very successful marketing firm. But well, before I even knew what marketing was, I was called to be an advocate for music because it's some, it's a place that made me feel whole. It's a place where I connected. I love the creativity. I like the way it makes me feel.

And I was marketing, handing out those flyers, setting up those web pages. Well, before I knew that would be a career. So it's amazing how thanks for bringing up my brother. Cause it's amazing how he seeded. That piece of my life that led to something that that was a lot bigger. Yeah, and we just skipped through a [00:12:00] lot and that's from saying all those little quote unquote little things are really big things There are hinges in our life sometimes So as you're growing up, you're you know, you might have highs and lows But that music kind of set that path of where you are today and led into the marketing.

Is there anything, let's say between your birth and college that we missed that was significant, high or low, or something you want to talk about or share that continued, that will influence your story today? Sure, man. I mean what came right before music is I wanted to be a basketball player. My, my grandpa was a division one basketball player, all American, was gonna make it to the NBA, but got a knee injury, had to have surgery, didn't make it.

And then his three sons, one of which is my father, All played basketball. So all the adult males in my life loved basketball. I loved basketball my whole childhood. I had a jersey [00:13:00] for every single day of the week. I'm sitting down right now, but I grew to be five foot eight. So it's reasonable to say I didn't end up being a superstar.

And I actually didn't hit a growth spurt. I matured late. You know, I wasn't even supposed to be born, right? I matured late and I didn't hit a growth spurt until late. So I got picked on a lot. I got bullied and my love of basketball kind of getting smushed by people that honestly just picked on me is a big bridge to what led me into music.

And it doesn't matter if it's basketball. Or music or nowadays marketing and business and podcasting and anything I've done I always score high on surveys. I score high in appreciation of beauty and excellence and everything from a fricking sunset to a slam dunk. This is the world operating. It's either God operating at a high level or humans operating [00:14:00] at a high level, a guitar solo, all of it.

That's one thing I love. What I'm doing today is a marketer, right? I'm a podcaster. It's all about appreciating a good thing and amplifying it. So it doesn't matter what I've done in my life. It's all just me loving something and doing whatever I can to amplify it, man. Music. Sports, marketing, podcasting, your show, man.

If the people haven't subscribed to your show, I think it's incredible and they should subscribe to it. Cause yeah, man, I find a good thing and I just want to support it. Yeah. Well, thank you. Thank you. And everything we do in life, like I talk to my kids, I don't care if you're building a shed, a house or a mansion, same fundamentals apply.

And if you're building a business that you just want to support your family, keep it small. If you want to build a local business that employs multiple families in the community, or if you want to build a massive, you know, fortune 100 company, it's the same fundamentals. So handing [00:15:00] out flyers and learning all the things you did.

That plays into it. It's, it's the human psyche and what's effective and what website funnel works and doesn't work and color schemes. So what were some of the key things that you're learning during this music journey and getting into the promotion that led you to where you are today? Yeah, a big one.

And I didn't know it at the time, but I was doing it. So now I can put words to it. But a mentor of mine, Brad Lee, he always says the more hands you shake, The more money you make, the more hands you shake, the more money you make. And back in the day, it's the more flyers you hand out, the higher probability someone shows up, the more personal you are in your approach.

You know, a lot of people, again let's talk music events, networking events, any of that, they put up an event, worst case scenario, they don't invite anybody to it. Slightly better scenario. They mass select a bunch of people and send [00:16:00] invitations. Maybe you click select all the real promoters that do the best job at getting people in the door or the ones that send individual messages.

In some cases, individual phone calls, a text, and they, they have a personalized approach at saying, Hey, David, I know we haven't talked in forever. I'd really love if you came to this event because I want to introduce you to A, B, and C, and they create this personalized approach to everything they do. So it's kind of like people talk about quality.

They talk about quantity. I think it's both. The more hands you shake, the more money you make. But the more present you are and deliberate you are with every one of those interactions, the more you're injecting steroids in what you're doing. So again, music was all about that. I found in, in bands, a lot of the most popular bands weren't the best bands.

At least at a local level, like a [00:17:00] grassroots level, you know, the big stuff, the big people that get signed, that's a whole different world. But at a local level... The bands that drew the highest audience weren't the most talented. They were the ones that were the most personable. I at least had one person, whether it's a friend, a girlfriend, one member, they at least had one person out there talking to people, introducing, like bringing energy, the bands that just show up, play and disappear.

And never talk to their people. They never made it big and they never gained momentum. Same goes with any business. Same goes with literally almost anything we do in life. We can have talent. Talent is important, but where's your grit? Are you going to be personable? Are you going to show up for your audience?

Are you going to provide a great experience for them? And that's huge, man. So people talk about quality. People talk about quantity. I feel like you got to do [00:18:00] both. And if you're overspent, you got to find team members and ambassadors to help you. Because if you have a good thing, the world deserves to hear it.

And we're doing them a disservice by not giving it to them in the best way possible. Yeah, I agree with what you say from a biblical standpoint. It says a false balance is abomination to the Lord, but a just weight is his delight. I agree with you as a man who's lived in reality. And I agree with you as a marketing professional who sees this every day.

You gotta have balance. Like if you have all of one, you know, if you're all left, you're crazy. If all you're right, you're crazy. The middle is the balance where you want to be. So yeah, I couldn't agree more. Now, when you're out there and you're talking about bands being personal, And they're just, you know, I thought of two bands.

I thought it was a Grateful Dead and Train, you know, Grateful Dead. Everybody's like, don't record, don't bootleg. And like bootleg all day. Right. And then Train to this day, you can ask somebody, Hey, you like train? Most people don't even know who they are in this generation. But if you start naming, [00:19:00] they have hit after hit, after hit, after hit.

And it's like, Oh, I love that song. Right. So. You know, I, I look at companies that have, I don't want to call anybody out, but huge global companies. that have adequate quality products, but man, people perceive them as first class, you know, but the key isn't their quality of their product. It's they put 10 percent of their marketing budget back and telling people how great it is, right?

So there's companies like that. So I want to bring authentic, really good quality to a client. And I know you do too, but talk to our business owners because you can be the best restaurant in the world. And if nobody knows about you, you're going to go out of business. You can be the best physician in the world, diagnostician.

Nobody knows about you. You're going to go out of business. So I don't think there's been a time in. History where marketing wasn't more impactful. [00:20:00] Sadly, a lot of people manipulate it and you have pieces of crap saying they have great products and they don't, and they're just stealing money. But there's so many talented people listening right now to this podcast where they're almost, they're frustrated.

They're almost angry. Like, man, I am great at what I do. But the problem is people don't know it. Help those people. What would you say to someone who has a good quality product or service, but they're frustrated because the sales are just not coming in? So I have an answer, but let's demonstrate it. Cause you and I talked really briefly about this before we clicked record.

So you're, you're working with my pillow now go back to the first time you purchased one of their products. Why did you purchase one of their products? It was a referral from my physical therapist, and he said it would help the lump in my, the lump, I say lump in my neck, God forbid, the knot in my shoulder.

Got it. That, that, that's a case study [00:21:00] example of third party feedback, third party testimonial. I won't get into the science of it cause I'll butcher it, but scientifically the most persuasive. thing we can do to, it's not, Hey, listen to how great my products and services are. I have the best next, next, best solution.

It's better than sliced bread. People don't want to hear how passionate you are. Passion does come across, but nothing is more persuasive. Then a recommendation from a trusted source. There's even surveys that show that an untrusted source, a nameless, faceless review, 5, 000 of them though, at a 4. 7 stars is incredibly persuasive, far more persuasive than me talking about how cool I am.

So you add a trusted source, recommend them, and then it worked for you. And then you started recommending it to your people. The question business leaders have to be asking themselves is how do I get my [00:22:00] top clients, customers, how do I get my success stories talking about me and market it to the world?

And in a lot of cases, how do I incentivize them to? So in your case, you have a partnership with MyPillow, correct? Yeah, they're an affiliate sponsor now for the, for season nine and forward for the Remarkable People Podcast. Yeah. So it's a mutually beneficial agreement. And in your case, you're like, I'm going to talk about y'all anyways.

And they're like, well, I want to help fund you and sponsor you to do it. So it's a win win scenario. It doesn't have to be a big affiliate agreement though. There's pizza shops that where you go in and it's as simple as taking a picture of the pizza, tagging them. Sharing it to your Instagram story and then you get 25 percent off or you get your next slice free.

You go in, you take a selfie at this place, you get a discount. You incentivize people to talk about you because they're already talking about you. Might as well, again, amplify it, inject [00:23:00] steroids into it with a small incentive. So a business leader needs to ask themselves, Who is best to talk about me? And is there any kind of incentive I can provide them?

Is it a 25 gift card? Is it, is it taking their photo that they took and putting it on the wall? So then you have a wall of your customers at your ice cream shop. And every time people come in, they go and they look at their funny Halloween photo that they took as a customer that sits on the wall. And then there's all that social proof that all these people love you.

There's so many ways you can do it. I'll give one more. Simple, basic way because I will do this to you, to you with you and not do it to you like, ah, but after this podcast, if you'd like, I will leave you a video review. Now it's easy peasy for me. I've already done it. The listener to hit five stars on Apple or leave like a YouTube review, but we're already on zoom.

So I know that you already clicked [00:24:00] record and I know your team's awesome and they can just edit this part out of the podcast at the end, I can leave you a video review on the spot and then you can use that any way you want. You can use it on your website, you can take the transcript you can take my photo and use my review.

It's up to you as the business leader, as the podcaster. But my question is if you're meeting your clients. On Zoom, why aren't you just asking them for reviews on the spot? You just tripled their sales in three years. You just added 10 percent gross revenue in a quarter. Why don't you go, David, I really appreciate you as a client.

Me helping someone like you and serving someone like you is what I love to do. I'd love to serve other business leaders that have a similar a problem that you had, would you be willing on just like leaving me a testimonial talking about the process together so I can go help more people? [00:25:00] Then David leaves me a testimonial.

I can use that to leverage. Here's the key. I actually brought results for David. I'm not making this shit up, but then I can use that as leverage to get the attention of other people. And then I can help them. So the person that is acting like they're amazing and putting out a bunch of pay per click marketing dollars, but not delivering results is actually going to get lapped.

By the person that's delivering results and has an army of testimonials to prove it. Yeah, that don't make sense. A hundred percent. And if our listeners have any questions, as you know, check out the show notes, you can reach out to Ben, reach out to myself at the end of the show. Ben's going to talk about where he's at and where he's going, how you can connect with him to continue the conversation.

But let's talk about this, Ben. You said originally, you know, you were kind of shy and that was one of the things you had to deal with. And many people. In business ones who are excellent at what they [00:26:00] do, they get afraid, embarrassed, or hesitant to ask for referrals, which to me and you now, Dave Pascal alone today.

Ben, today, we know. Forget that. That's stupid. Ask. But for the people who are still struggling, what are the things you did? This will be our first reverse engineering moment. What's, what are the things you did? To say, Hey, I just need to get over myself and over this and ask, what are the things you've seen work in your life?

Yeah. I mean, before I even get into me specifically, like anyone at home, think about who you help and what that does for them. And let's say your service helps them generate income. What's that income do? It allows them to donate to their church. It allows them to feed their family. It allows them to live a better life.

So if you don't help that person. I don't want to say it, but it's true. Maybe they don't live as good of a life as if [00:27:00] you did. So with that frame, it's almost like our duty. If, if the keyword is if. Only if we can serve someone, actually help them. If we don't, aren't we doing a disservice to this world? So that you got to break the mental barrier that I don't want to talk about myself.

I want to be humble. I want to be modest. Humility is good, but are you hiding in the corner? I spend most my life hiding in the corner. And let me tell you part of why I was hiding in the corner. I started to read personal growth books. I started to read business podcasts, biz, read business. I started listening to business podcasts, people like James Altucher, Jordan Harbinger, Chris Van Vliet.

These are all like top rated shows that I was listening to almost 10 years ago. All of them have been a guest on my podcast now. And the big difference is I was listening [00:28:00] and it was infotainment. But I wasn't actually taking any action to implement. And the more information I gained with the least amount of action, the more I felt like an imposter.

It's hard to stand up and speak with confidence when you have the answer, but you're not implementing the answer. I was drinking way too much. I was following my father's footsteps, drinking way too much. I was talking business strategy, but I wasn't always implementing the things that was coming out of my mouth.

And it wasn't actually until I started to eat better, quit drinking, sleep better, focus on actually implementing the things I learned. That I gained confidence. I mean, confidence really just comes with from, from memories of winning memories of success. So I started to gain little pieces of success and two things.

I just said two things here. You gain confidence by, you know, [00:29:00] winning and being in alignment with who you want to become and the mindset to know that I was put here to serve. And if I know rationally, this is a very rational explanation, but it's true. If I know I can help someone and I know that third party testimonials are persuasive, it only makes sense from a business mindset to get those testimonials.

So I can help more people. So I can have more. Momentum to take the message and reach more people. And it continues to ripple and ripple and ripple. So number one, we gotta, we gotta get rid of that mindset, but the best way to get rid of that negative limiting belief mindset is to prove to yourself. That you deserve the momentum, that you deserve the people.

And yeah, man, the moment you start taking action, [00:30:00] the moment you start implementing the things that the listener, I assume this isn't their first episode. If they are, they might've came because of me. And I talk about this shit all the time. So it's like, why aren't you implementing it? I love you, but take it, take action.

Most of your listeners have already heard great advice on your show. The question is, what actions are you going to take? And it's not, let's not feel bad about ourselves. I spend most of my life learning and not taking action. This is just a wake up call reminder incentive that, Hey, just start taking action.

It doesn't even have to be this episode. It could be something you learned last week. It could be something that you read in a book later today. And yeah man, I kind of went all over the place on the question, but if we don't have the mindset and feel worthy, we're not going to ask for the sale. We're not going to ask for the referral.

We might not even get started. So this is some essential stuff in my opinion. [00:31:00] Yeah, I couldn't agree more. And there's a term that every time I hear it, and you don't have to agree with me, man. If you don't agree with something, you call me out right on air. I don't care if it's live on stage. But, the fake it till you make it, I want to punch people in the face when they say that.

Now, if you have a mental block, And you know you have good quality and everybody else is like, oh man, I love your work, Cindy, I love your work, John, whoever it is. That's when you push through. It's not fake it till you make it, it's just shut that shit off and move forward, right? That's taking action. But don't fake, you know, I am a skilled metal worker and go get a job building a building.

You're gonna kill people, right? It's just not how it works. So... Can I, can I add one tiny thing to that? Yeah, dude, add anything you want. I, I prefer be it. Until you become it. Now, I can't just be a skilled metal worker. I'm humble enough to know I don't have the skill set. But fake it until you make it.

Yeah. I don't like, [00:32:00] I'm not, I don't want to be a fake. Exactly. And you're going to cost people money because you're an experience. But why would I want to fake caring? Why would I want to fake loving my client? Why would I want to fake loving my family? Even if you feel like you have a rough past, which I do.

Start loving your clients. Start loving your family. Start taking action. Be it until you become it. If you want to be a more prosperous person, do what prosperous people do. Don't fake what prosperous people do. Just be that person today, and then through momentum and the blessings that come into our life, ultimately we will become that person.

And we probably always were that person. person. We were just trying to be a fake and then we went in the wrong direction. I'm passionate about, I hate that phrase. I was never going to defend that phrase in my life. No, I mean, but there's so many people that say it and most of the people, none of, [00:33:00] I'm going to, I mean, there's, there's a couple of speakers that are world renowned, write books and make millions of dollars and they've never done a damn thing in their life.

And they use that phrase all the time. So if you want to use that phrase and have an empty life, you're going to make a lot of money, but you're also going to screw a ton of people on the way and you're not going to have dignity in yourself. So I think Ben and I are on the same page with that one, but I did notice on, we kind of, we talked about asking for the referral and taking action, find your unique code.

We kind of flipped the model. Going back, one of the things for us to be confident, to take action, to do such a good job that we asked for the referral, Is that finding our unique code, finding what are we good at and what is special about us? What are the things that you did in your life to help you identify that and become confident?

Yeah, that's such a good question. It's, the reason it's such a good question is I don't think I have a actionable. Answer. And what I mean by I don't have an actionable answer [00:34:00] is I truly have discovered that everything that has happened in our past is preparing us for who do we get to be today and who we get to be in the future.

So there's no cheat code on experiencing life. You know, I mentioned loving music, I'm creative, I mentioned loving sports, I'm competitive, I have an appreciation for people that are really good at stuff, I mentioned loving marketing, I like promoting and highlighting a good thing, I started a music podcast in 2016 for that very reason, I wanted to elevate a good thing, I got into marketing because I want to elevate businesses.

This is just part of who I am. It's actually really difficult for me to cross, like, go back and analyze what I did. I just lived my life. But [00:35:00] one thing I will say is being curious and I mean, what does, what does the military do after a mission? They sit down. And they actually go through what went right, what went wrong, they journal about it, they figure out strategies, they go out and they're going to do it differently, or they're going to beta test different ways.

So live your life, but then if you have a red flag, or you realize you did something wrong, or you did something that felt like it was out of alignment with who you wanted to become, You just go out and you maybe change, you make a variation, you try it differently. So curiosity, again, I don't know if I can teach it.

I just happen to be a curious person. And if you start seeing everything that happened in your life. As a gift, because it prepared you for where you get to be today. And you start learning from people that are steps in front of you. They're not any better than you. They're just [00:36:00] farther along based on your specific DNA code, who you are.

Here's the thing I'm talking about doing self discovery. The truth is most people don't do it, and I can't tell someone how to be successful if I don't know their DNA code. And I can't figure out their DNA code unless you do some self discovery. So look back at the moments in your life. Look back at what lights you up.

Look back at what triggers you. What does that mean? And then what does the people that you aspire to be like, what are they doing? And when you understand yourself and you understand what they do to be successful, you can create your own game plan to get beyond even where they are. Yeah, I think that's well said.

Completely well said. So now, Your journey, you're moving through college. You start promoting music. Where does your life go from there, Ben? [00:37:00] You know, it's, it's really difficult because being in the music scene and coming from a family that had issues with addiction, I fell into that crutch. I fell into that darkness.

I was drinking myself to death, basically. Like, are you saying there's drug use and alcoholism in the music industry? A little bit. I'm just a little bit sarcastic, dude. Oh, a little bit. And even if you're not drinking and doing drugs, the bar doesn't close and the bar doesn't close till two. So you're hurting your sleep.

That's for sure. And I started to have anxiety attacks and I didn't quite understand why. And. What I realized now that they don't happen like they used to is it was hang anxiety. It was hangover anxiety. My physiology was off. I was trying to focus, but I couldn't because I was fricking hung over. And then what happened when I was, I was a sales executive for a large [00:38:00] firm and it was a high stress job.

Every Monday morning before I went into my marketing job, I would take a self prescribed, and I'm saying it now, come arrest me, I'm right here, a self prescribed Xanax because I just had to get through the day. And I'm coming in, kinda hungover, taking a Xanax, basically sleepwalking through the week. I was frickin not in a good place, and it blows my mind.

This is why I talk about, I understood the answers. I was a smart dude, but I was doing all the things that a not smart person that doesn't love themselves would do. And... It wasn't until the pandemic, that's actually when I started my business. It's actually when I started my business podcast, I got furloughed during the pandemic.

I hit, again, it's a proverbial rock bottom. I still had a home. I still had a pillow. I still had heat, but I was depressed and I was lost. It was a proverbial rock bottom. And out of that [00:39:00] pandemic and out of that rough moment. Came the building of my business that I get to run today and the podcast. And honestly, like I've been in and out of like, Oh, I can have a drink here, there, this, or that I'm over a hundred days, completely sober as we speak right now, and I honestly can't remember the last time I felt this clear.

And again, I, I'm not opposed to someone having a drink now. And then if that works for them, I'm a fan of moderation. I'm not going to tell people what they can and can't do, but I know that like 106 days, I think is the number. I don't know. Sober. I'm fricking clear. And I haven't had an anxiety attack like that in months.

And right. I don't even have a fricking closure question. I don't have a statement, man. I'm still questioning what this means for me, but I know that I'm on the right path and I know it feels good. Yeah, that's great. Especially with anxiety. I mean, alcohol is a mood magnifier, and if you have anxiety, it's going to make it [00:40:00] worse.

And I don't care if it's alcohol, drugs, pornography, food. We all have holes and emptiness in places if we don't replace it with God. And if you, if you're feeling that way, you're going to fill it with something. And so, you know, I could drink, I could do drugs and it's not going to affect me. But if you put chocolate cupcakes in front of me, I'm going to pig out.

So like, that's detrimental to my body. Physically, you had an alcohol issue. Somebody else could have a drug issue. Somebody else could have a pornography issue. It's just filling a gap. So drilling down to find that. core root of what's going on in our lives is what's important. And then you replace it with God and life just only gets better and brighter.

So now you went through the pandemic. You've, you're in a place that's better than you've ever been. What are the things between your birth and today? Did we miss anything before we transitioned to where's been today? And what are the things you're doing today and moving [00:41:00] forward? You just ask anything between birth.

And today that we miss, it's important that you want to talk about that. At least that you want to talk about narrows it a little bit. Cause we miss like, you know, 31 years and 23 hours. We missed a lot, man. You missed a lot, my friend. And that's the beauty of it again. Like yeah. Never been to prison, never hurt anybody, but in drinking, I was arrested three times just from drinking, because I was drinking for, let me give you an example, you're drinking underage, you throw a house party, the person liable for everyone at that party is the person that has the house and brought the alcohol.

So I was a 20 year old with a fake ID, drinking with other people underage, and I would get in trouble. I got arrested. I got a [00:42:00] DWI when I was 21. I was making all the wrong decisions. And you asked me to bring something up we missed. I never talk about that because it's so far in the past, but like, the mistakes we made in our past doesn't have to define our future.

Like, Luckily, I've never been to prison. I feel like a lot of people are felons, whether it's carrying drugs one day or drunk driving, like a lot of people do stupid stuff. I'm blessed that I didn't get in that much trouble. I didn't hurt nobody. And I realized that that past again, doesn't have to define the future.

And I think that the mistakes I made gives me better context of when my girlfriend's children. They're making a couple of mistakes and a lot of people around us make mistakes and, and I see my own problems. as a gift that gives me the empathy [00:43:00] to be a little more understanding when other people screw up once in a while.

Awesome. Now let me ask, what were some of the things you did? Cause you know, you talked about going to work. You'd have to take a Xanax to get through the week, right? Statistically, people can go online and Google it. More suicides happen on Sunday night than any day of the week. Cause so many people hate their life and their job and they can't dread going to work the next day.

It's really sad. So what were some of the things you did Specifically, like if you were talking to somebody who's having a problem with alcoholism, what are some of the things that you'd recommend to them to help them at least start the process of being free? Yeah. I want to simplify it. I don't think I have an answer that your listener doesn't already have.

They know what's healthy. They know what lights them up. What lights you up? It does. You, your diet might not be perfect, but what foods are healthy? [00:44:00] Is consuming this drug, this alcohol making you better? Or is it making you bitter? Is pornography helping you in your relationships? What does? I assume the listener has answers to questions like this.

Do the latter. Don't do what makes you bitter. makes you better. All I did objectively is take incremental actions. You know, every morning I have a short meditation practice. I write in my journal. I won't go deep into all this, but I write my intentions for the day and I write the best moment from the previous day in my journal.

I write down 10 ideas a day because I want to get the creative idea muscle flowing. And I get the blood flowing with a little exercise. I do some affirmations. I visualize what I want to accomplish and I have these little habits. [00:45:00] That's just me, but I, I took tiny itsy bitsy actions. And those actions were based around what was going to make me better and not better.

And over time, incrementally, it blows my mind. Like I actually, I don't know if me today and me five years ago would even vibe. Would get along . That's very true. That is so, I don't even think, I don't think I'd like that person. And I think that the person five years ago would think that I'm smug and full of myself,

I don't know, man. But I took incremental action and that's the key. But it goes back to my first statement. Most people already know they've been taught. Maybe they've read, maybe they feel it intuitively do what's right. That's the easiest thing we can do and we can start doing that the second and in every [00:46:00] moment.

What's, what's right? What feels good? Do that. Don't do the other thing. Is that too simple? No, cause I mean, just because something's simple doesn't mean it's easy. Especially when we all have demons in our head in some way, shape or form that we're fighting past. Like you said whether you call it self sabotage or limiting beliefs or negative behavior, they're there.

And I think the key, and you correct me if I'm wrong, is just being real with yourself. God knows the truth, and you know the truth. You can lie to everybody. You can even lie to yourself. But if we're not being real, you're not going to have any change.

Yeah. That's go ahead. What were you saying? I'm sorry. I was going to say when you take the mask off when you're when you're there naked, only you and God knows what you've done and who you are. Why are you wearing a mask? Yeah. I remember when I first got saved when I was in my teens [00:47:00] and I remember people lying about stuff.

I'm like, why are you lying? Even if everybody believes you, you know, you're an idiot and God knows you're lying. Why? Just tell the truth. If you did the, I remember even in business, one of the greatest moments, like lessons about leadership was I had a manager come to me who I didn't even necessarily know like a respect, right?

Opposite of everything sales is. I just met the guy, didn't really know him well. And he said, Dave, I know I got this position. You don't really know me? And he's like, I just want you to know that no matter what you do, by accident or on purpose, as long as you tell me first, we'll work through it and I got your back.

He's like, but if you hide it, if you lie about it, if it catches me off guard, he's like, you're on your own, brother. And I, I never forget that conversation because we weren't trying to hide anything, but he was just telling me his style of leadership. Like we work through problems together, but be fully honest.

And I've respected that and try to apply it to my life every day. [00:48:00] Is that what you've seen work in your life and your client's life too? Yeah. I don't know what to say other than yes. It's a beautifully, beautiful lesson, beautifully stated and talk about a exemplar in leadership and empathy. Just disclosure, honesty, and then empathy when things go wrong, we can plan the future together.

Yeah, that, that just happened. I don't, I don't have a magic wand where I can just make the past go away. That happened. Let's figure out how we can make it better for the future. We just invested in your training. That mistake is an investment in our training. What are we going to do next? Yeah, exactly.

Well put, man. You're, you're the king. God's the king. I just repeat what the to that. Amen to that. No, no. Yeah. So, well, let's do this. Let's talk about where's Ben today. Where are [00:49:00] you heading? And like, and we'll connect into that. How can our listeners get ahold of you? You know, I'll put a link in the show notes to any kind of special offers you have, your website, any kind of contact info.

But where has Ben today? Where are you heading? You just helped us. How can we help you get to your next goal? Dude, I'm, I'm on a journey with you, with everybody listening, I'm still out there working and figuring it all out. My, my ultimate goal at the core is to get the wisdom and knowledge and experience from the people who have it to the people who need it.

My goal is to help be that bridge because if I can help, I think one of our biggest expenses and failures in this world is not having access to good education. And now with the internet and books and podcasts, we have better access to the education, but what is good education? What's good mentorship?

There's a lot of marketers out [00:50:00] there slinging shit that doesn't work and they're just trying to take your money. My goal is to be one of those, just be one of those people out there that serves as a bridge. Wisdom from the people who have it to the people who need it. A lot of times the reason I do my podcast is I'm in the need of category.

I'm still out there learning as well. So whether it's through the podcast, which is a one to many. Free. I don't currently have any sponsors. I just do it all for free to try to grace people and share what I've learned with them, whether it's through the podcast, whether it's through some of the virtual networking events, completely free events I put on.

We're just jumping on one to one conversations or a phone call if someone needs help. That's my goal, man, just to, to share the love as I learn it. And I just want to say, man, I, I wouldn't be here without you. So the first thing I would do if I was a listener is hit [00:51:00] five stars on this, leave a comment if you want bonus points, show some love here, subscribe here, because Real Business Connections is my podcast.

Real Business Connections is my brand. You can find that where you found this, but you can't bridge to me without this podcast. So show some love here first and then search Real Business Connections wherever you found this or Google it. And if you can't Google it and find me. I'm a bad marketer and I should quit my day job.

So just Google real business connections. That's awesome. Now let's get another question answered. Yeah, man. What's the best way for listeners to connect with you if they want to personally continue the conversation, maybe hire you for some services? Is it go to a website? Is it LinkedIn? Is it Instagram?

What's your best route? You know, to me, that's a tough question because the best route is the route you'll take. Now, I'm on Instagram. I'm on [00:52:00] Facebook. I'm on LinkedIn. I'm dormant on TikTok. I'm not on x. com. But you've got links in the notes. Someone can Google it. The best route is the route you're going to take.

If you message me on TikTok, it might take me longer than if you message me on LinkedIn. The place I spend most of my time is on LinkedIn. So if you're active on LinkedIn, message me there. I love LinkedIn. But again, the best route's the route you're going to take. Find me. Send me an email. My phone number's online.

Call me. Text me. I don't want to tell someone they have to go to LinkedIn. That being said, if you have LinkedIn. Like three hours a day on LinkedIn. So I'll be there, but do something. I'll be there wherever you are, man. That's the thing as a marketer, this is a small side note. If you want to build a personal brand and market yourself, you need to be omnipresent.

It's not about reach me where I am. It's reach me where you are. [00:53:00] So I'm omnipresent online. I want to meet my audience. I want to meet the person I can serve. In the best way that serves them. So as a marketer, as a personal brand, anyone at home, even if you're not utilizing all your profiles, set up a profile everywhere because omnipresence makes it so you're there and available when someone looks for you.

I think that's a good idea. That's definitely, and everybody has a different approach and there's not like quote unquote right from wrong, there's just more or less efficient, you know? So how can I be even better each day? And like you said, you'll reach out and you'll get a connection anywhere, but it'll be fastest on LinkedIn.

So, if you got LinkedIn, reach out to Ben for LinkedIn. And my LinkedIn looks the best, so it's a little social proof. Ben looks cool on LinkedIn, he looks lame on Instagram. And my YouTube's badass, but again, go on my LinkedIn, it makes me look cool. That's awesome. I find, well, it's been a true pleasure spending time with you today, but any final thoughts, anything we [00:54:00] skipped, any special offers or books or anything that we missed that we want, you want to share before we close this chapter?

We'll go to what I started with. There's no key to success. It's a combination lock. A lot of what I spoke of today. I didn't come up with all of it. I learned it through surrounding myself with brilliant people. So think about the people you are inspired to be like. Consume more of their content. If this podcast inspires you, consume more of it.

Because be it until you become it, surround yourself with the people that you want to become more like, find your combination, find mentors, invest in a coach, invest in help, and you'll become a better person for it. And I'm a testament to that. And I'm a testament for the fact that I'm still hiring coaches and I'm still paying for different things because at the end of the day, I want to continue to evolve.

And it just goes back to, [00:55:00] there's no key. It's a combination. Let's go find our combination. Yeah. And it doesn't matter if you're an athlete, if you're a business consultant, it doesn't matter if you're a barber or hairdresser, you're always growing, you're always learning. You're always continuing to sharpen your skills.

And I mean, everybody from people you've never, never will hear of. To people who are famous like Jack Welch and, you know, Elon Musk and Donald Trump. These guys are learning, they're growing, and they're applying what they learned and rolling with it and becoming better. So don't be afraid to keep growing.

Pretty much if you stop growing, you're dying. So that's a bad day. Amen to that. All right, Ben. Well, it's been a true pleasure. You're a remarkable man. I'm glad we became friends and ladies and gentlemen, as you listen to this show, like our slogan says, don't just listen to the great content and advice.

Ben, share with you. Do it. Repeat it each day, so you can have a remarkable life in this world, and most importantly, an attorney to come. [00:56:00] And like Ben mentioned, check out his podcast, connect with him on LinkedIn, and then this show is now brought to you by MyPillow. So thank Mike Lindell and his team. Not only are they keeping business as much as they can in America, But they're making amazing products.

Personally use them and love them. Use promo code Remarkable for up, I think they have almost 300 products now and you get up to 80 percent off. I think the lowest discount, don't quote me, is 25 percent all the way up to 80 percent with just going to their website, use promo code Remarkable and bam, you get those discounts for life.

So I'm David Pasqualone, this is our friend Ben Albert. Ben, thank you again for being here today brother. Honored for the time, man. This was fun. Awesome. All right, ladies and gentlemen, we'll see you in the next epiho epiho episode. Share with your family and friends. Love you. Ciao. Peace. 

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