Lisa Marie Platske | The World Needs You: Finding Safety, Establishing Healthy Relationships, & Walking with God

"Forgiveness is the one thing that can change the past, present, and future." - Lisa Marie Platske

EPISODE OVERVIEW: 

Today's guest talks about finding safety in your life, forgiveness, establishing healthy relationships, walking with God, and so much more. She is a leadership expert with a federal law enforcement background, an entrepreneur, and someone who understands the human psyche. She's an expert in motivation, staying focused on goals, and teaching people to embrace the future. And as you're going to hear, she did not have the easiest journey in learning these lessons, nor does she now. Today she explains that while she doesn't know what the future holds, she recognizes and loves who holds the future- the Lord Jesus Christ. Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to the Lisa Marie Platske story!

GUEST BIO: 

An award-winning leadership expert in human behavior, Lisa Marie Platske has received accolades from the United States Small Business Administration, and The International Alliance for Women, recognized as one of the top 100 women making a difference in the world. She left her Federal law enforcement career after 9/11 to build Upside Thinking, Inc. A member of the Forbes Coaches Council, she has trained or coached over 100,000 leaders around the globe.

SHOW NOTES:

Guest Contact Info:

• Website: https://www.upsidethinking.com/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/lisa.marie.platske
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lisamarieplatske
• Ho’ponopono prayer: https://hooponoponomiracle.com/ho-oponopono-hawaiian-forgiveness-prayer/
• Dr. Shawne Duperon and The Apology: https://projectforgive.com/the-apology/
• Are you longing to fulfill your divine purpose? Check our Lisa Marie's Upside Summit: www.UpsideSummit.com 

Remarkable People Podcast Listener Special Offer(s):

•  Strategy call with Lisa Marie: https://www.upsidethinking.com

Transcript

Lisa Marie Platske | The World Needs You: Finding Safety, Establishing Healthy Relationships, & Walking with God 

Hey, am I Remarkable friend. Welcome to this week's episode of the podcast. Before I introduce today's guest, I just wanted to thank you for being such a Remarkable community. We have listeners like you all over the world. We have people buying the book and getting help from the [00:01:00] Remarkable people Volume One book and sharing it with not just us, but others.

We have. Your love and your support, and even though we're on this side of the podcast, it's so awesome when you leave positive reviews or when you write us an email and let us know how we're doing. So before I redo anything, I just wanted to say thank you. For being part of this community. I hope this show brings you tremendous value and you can apply it to your life and be a better person and more successful and more peace and joy.

If it can't, or if you have ideas to make it even better, please write me through the website, David Pasqualone dot com. And I would love to get your feedback, even if it's super negative, super ugly, or wonderful, constructive, whatever it is, send your feedback in. We can't wait to hear from you, and hopefully we can just improve either way.

Now, at this time, we have a special treat. Today's guest is a phenomenal human, [00:02:00] and I was so thankful to be able to become friends, spend time together, hear her story, and just dialogue and grow. You're going to hear an episode that is going to talk about how the world needs you, not just bs, not touchy-feely, not proofy stuff, but seriously, God made you specifically and the world needs you.

For what God intended you to be. So this episode talks about finding safety in your life, forgiveness, establishing healthy relationships, walking with God, and so much more. Our guest today is a leadership expert. She comes out of the federal law enforcement background. And then for the last years, she's had her own leadership consulting company.

So this is someone who understands the human psyche, how to motivate, how to stay focused on goals. But as you're going to see, she [00:03:00] did not have the easiest journey, nor does she now. But while she doesn't know what the future holds, she recognizes and loves who holds the future, the Lord Jesus Christ, our God, right?

So our God, you may or may not believe, but listen to the guest journey and you will undoubtedly see how your life connects with hers and how you can find help. Now as a Christian, as someone who trusts Christ and follows him, and like today's guest does as well, we want you to come to know God, and we're going to talk about that at the end of the episode.

But for now, if you're looking to overcome adversity and achieve success, today's guest can be a catalyst in your life to do so. So ladies and gentlemen, I welcome you to the Lisa Marie Plats story.

Lisa Marie Platske | The World Needs You: Finding Safety, Establishing Healthy Relationships, & Walking with God: 

Hey, Lisa Marie, how are you today? I am doing well. [00:04:00] Excited to be here with you, David. Oh, we're excited to have you. I just told our listeners a little bit about you and your story, and they are pumped to hear from you and to grow together. Before we get started though, we're going to go through your journey from birth through today and then kind of get a feel for where you're headed.

Cuz everything that happens to us in the past, good, bad, ugly, pretty, pretty ugly. It makes us who we are, right? So we're going to get it. Sure does. Yeah. And we're going to go through your whole story and extract the things you overcame or achieved in life and break it down in practical steps so the listeners can too.

But before we do, whether somebody's a first time listener, whether someone's listened to every episode of the podcast, whether they've heard you speak before, or whether they've never even heard your name. What can they be guaranteed in this episode that if they hang through, they'll get a bunch of gold nuggets for life.

But if there is one truth that you want them to get at the end of this episode that they can apply to their lives, [00:05:00] what is that? The one truth is that the world needs them. If the world needs them and their brilliance, and that you've got to God light inside you and that there is resilience that is needed in order to sometimes turn that on and keep that turned on with, without it, the world misses out and you miss out.

That is absolutely the one thing that is guaranteed. All right. Well, that sounds like a great concept. Something we all need. Great truth. And let's get into it. So, Lisa Marie, where were you born? What was your upbringing like? Were you born in the States? Were you born overseas? Brothers, sisters, father, mother, aunts, uncles.

Where, where did it all start for you? All started in Allentown, Pennsylvania. So I was born there and my mom and dad were excited to have me. I was the first child, and so they were thrilled to have kids. [00:06:00] And my sister came along three years later. Marriage was rocky between the two of them. And there was a lot of just fighting and a lot of I would say rockiness is really the, the best, the best way that I can describe it.

And so when, when I was six, my dad left and leaving my sister and my my sister and I to be raised by a single mom. And the place that we lived at that I remember growing up was like a row home, like where homes are all stuck together. And the kids that were in the neighborhood, because this was back in the 1970s and the early 1970s, they weren't allowed to play with me because back then they thought the divorce was contagious, the kids in the neighborhood.

So growing up it was a really [00:07:00] strange experience where some of the parents didn't allow their kids to spend a whole lot of time with my sister and I. And then as a child, I mean, starting at six years old, did you understand that they won't play with me because it's divorce? Or was it like, why won't they play with me?

What was that like? Yeah, I don't know. I, I really can't say that I, that I had an understanding of that. I knew that my sister and I were different in that we went to a Catholic school. We would we went to a school that my, my grandparents lived about 15 minutes or so. And so my mom would work her job and drive us over there, and then we would, we would be taken to school in the morning.

And I'm not sure that, that I really got it. You know, I, I, I. When you're a kid, you believe that everything that you're doing is the way everybody else [00:08:00] does it. And so as a kid, you know, I thought that everybody had spent as much time with their grandparents as I did. And as a kid, the one area when I said, you know, I knew we were different, was that in school, the only, the only person, the only other kid that I knew wa who had parents that were divorced, there was only one, and she left after first grade.

So I, I didn't, there wasn't any, it wasn't like, there was o you know, there was, there was zero. So that being, even if kids had parents that had wildly Traumatic or, or parents that didn't get along or that argued in public. They had two parents in the household. So it was just such a, a, a different you know, a different experience at school.

However, I can't say that I thought I, that I understood in the neighborhood what that was all about. And, and I didn't [00:09:00] really understand that why they went to different school than I did. Like, you know, that I literally went to school 15 minutes away in another area with no kids that were in the neighborhood.

I, I didn't understand that. Yeah. And now, when this happened, did your dad pick up and leave, like state, did he come back and see you? Was he part of your life at all, or was it complete separation? Well, I had six sets of stepparents growing up, and so my mom remarried several times over the years, and my dad remarried many times and my dad left for another woman and he cleaned out the house.

So I remember coming back from shopping and there was nothing in the house. Like he took everything, the furniture, the, I mean, he had the electricity turned off. It was a very spiteful thing. He took all my mom's clothes. I mean, he cleaned the house out. He left my sister in [00:10:00] my bed there, but there was nothing, there was no tv, there was no, we left to go grocery shopping and he came back, the house was empty, so clearly planned at six.

I didn't understand that as, you know, getting older, had to figure out that that's what happened. And it was for, it was with another woman. And so my dad fought for visitation. I still have no idea why in that. I shouldn't say that. Cancel clear. That's not true. I think my dad I really feel my dad loved me very much and his own demons.

He did the best that he could. And so looking back, him leaving was an act of love in the sense that there was so much violence from him hitting my mom. And I was only really little that I don't, I think that if he would not have [00:11:00] left, he would've killed her. And so, you know, looking back, can I say in, in the, in the most compassionate sense that leaving was an act of love and the greatest gift he could have given me because he didn't have the tools to give me.

What he may have felt that I deserved. And so he fought for visitation. And when I was eight I remember standing in front of the judge and saying, yeah, I don't wanna go with this guy. And the judge said, too bad you're a kid. You don't know what you're talking about and what you want. And I was like, yeah, I'm a pretty a, I'm a pretty adult kid.

And, and so I was forced to have visitation, but the only time my dad saw us was when he was married to somebody who liked kids. And so, out of those additional four wives, we spent very little time, we spent time with him, with the girlfriend that he left with, we spent, cuz she really liked kids. We spent no time [00:12:00] with wife two.

We spent a bunch of time with them, with wife three and not wife four or five. And when it was my high school graduation, I knew that I was done and that I would never see him again. And so the visitation was off and on between, you know, six and 16. And then during graduation, you know, he walked me up the hill and I knew that was it.

And I never, I never spoke to him again. And he passed away about eight years ago or so. And I, you know, I found out as I was, I just got a I had an experience where I was at my desk and had the Holy Spirit speak to me for years and by sitting at my desk when I was living in Virginia at the time, and I smelled the ice cream and it was this specific ice cream from Heisler's.

And I was like, I wonder what if that place is still around? And it had me look. Up online and for whatever [00:13:00] reason you know, I found out that my, you know, through looking online, I was like, geez, I wonder, you know, I wonder what my dad's up to. And I found out that he passed away. So kind of off often a little tangent there, David.

Sorry about that. No, not at all. This is all, we're going to go through your life and sometimes we jump around. So once your father left, your mom sent you to Catholic school, which is back then, especially divorce was taboo there too. But did they accept taboo? Huh? Taboo. Yes. Taboo. That's exactly it. Yes. But they, because your father was the one who left, I'm taking it.

They let your mom and, and you and your sister go to school there. So that's kind of how that happened. Is that correct? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. My mom was definitely an outcast though. And, and that's just, and, and I could never understand why. So. Yeah. And, and it's not something [00:14:00] that should be, but it's how it was societal, not biblical.

Exactly. Now, what about when this is all happening and you're growing up, you're going to school, was the rest of life, quote unquote, normal? Were there, was there anything else between where we just discussed your graduation and the last time you saw your father? Like what else happened in that gap from when you're, you know, from your birth basically to, to high school?

Is there anything else significant that you want to discuss? Well, I can't, I mean, the word normal is sort of funny. Like, I can't really say that that's, you know, that's, that's why I did air quotes, right? Yeah. Right. Exactly. Yeah, exactly. What what normal and, and so, you know, so I would, my mom was a nurse and she would turn the light on at five.

Five 30 in the morning in the hallway, and my sister and I would get our stuff ready and she would drive us to my grandparents and we'd get ready for school there. [00:15:00] And that was a little bit unusual being there and, and being with them. And my, I, my grandparents had two uncles that lived there. One was actually homeless and had an alcohol, was an alcoholic.

And another one, the other one was mentally disabled. And he gave me the greatest gift of compassion. You know, I, he's still alive and, you know, I learned so much about compassion through, through his, his His mental disability and just being different. And as a kid I hated it and I hated it because he was so different.

And I learned just so much, like I say, tenderness and compassion. But growing up it was it was I called the police a bunch of times. My mom's second husband was, was incredibly vi probably more violent than my own father. And I was often the person that he took things out at the mob would visit the house every so often [00:16:00] because he had a gambling issue.

And and so they, when he didn't pay debts it, it was you know, it was, you know, coming after the family. And then, like I say, I would call the police and then I would pack my sister's little blue suitcase up and tell her that we were going to go and that the police were going to come and take us away when the violence just got too, too much.

And When I was 13, let's see, when I was 12 12 was my, my first time I got into a school fight. 13 was I had a collapsed lung. So I was given 24 hours to live. And it's interesting, my background now, I've studied psychosomatics and emotional causes for disease in the body. Leadership is my, you know, is is what I do for, for, for work and for my, for my life.

And [00:17:00] so I was curious, and I shouldn't say that, that's not true. Cancel clear. I was, I was not really curious. God sent me this person in my life and it, it led to a, a level of curiosity that when I look back, now I can go, I. I understand why that collapsed lung happened, but getting 24 hours to live and being in the hospital and have all your friends come visit you, and how all of that went down, you know, makes me even clearer why I'm, I'm called to do the work that I'm called to do today.

So, and did they, so many things. Did they ever figure out what caused the collapse lung? From a scientific perspective, no, because I understand, like I had a tumor in my head when I was 18, so they knew it was a tumor, but they never knew the cause. So when you had the collapse lung, from a scientific standpoint, did they ever diagnose what caused it?

No. No. No, and that was the same thing at six. [00:18:00] After my dad left, I had epilepsy and I would pass out. And then, you know, by the time I was like eight or nine, it went away. And I really, I just look at all these things in my life and go, huh, you know, you're really funny. God, like, you, you like, that's why I say it's resilience.

It's resilience to say, you know, are you, are you willing to stay the course to do whatever it is that's yours to do? And I don't, it doesn't have to be that you're an adult that to decide that you can be a little kid and being faced with that. And I recognize that all of those situations that I was put in or all the challenges that I overcame are really ones where they're not.

Challenge is the only way I can describe it, because most people would say, you know, oh, those were all things that you over overcame or challenges. And yet for me it's like, no, that's just life. Like life is filled with a whole [00:19:00] lot of obstacles and a lot of, and, and there's people who decide to, to gain lessons from those and take them to thrive.

And there are people who pack up their bags and go, I don't, you know, this is not fun. I only want easy. And so I've gotten gifts from every single one of those experiences. The tenderness that I have for other people that have gone through in experiencing incredible traumas, I can feel and I can give them tools for their toolbox to be able to navigate that.

And so when I look at it all, it's, it's I. Yeah, they shouldn't have happened. Many of these things and at the same time where I got a whole lot of gifts from them and being able to navigate hard things. Yeah. And let's talk about that. My mind is shooting like five [00:20:00] different directions right now, and I'm thinking, well, she might talk about this in a little bit, but for the individuals listening right now who are maybe going through domestic abuse, you know, whether they're an adult or a child, what are some of the things that you can now look back and say, Hey, you know, this is really things that helped me break the cycles and be free.

What are some of the things that, that you can pinpoint now that you struggle with maybe as a child, a teen, a young adult, that you do a victory over now? Well, one of the things that I, that I look back and see so clearly is every person is hardwired for whatever their divine mission is. [00:21:00] And so it's not like one behavioral style is better than another.

And that's perhaps why. Another reason why I really love the leadership work that I do is because sometimes people will try to be something, they'll, they'll see somebody do something a certain way and they'll go, I wanna do that. And it's like, well, maybe. And maybe you're just hardwired to do things the way that you are doing them.

And so for me, I understand that in within me as a little kid, I had the ability to speak up. Now as a little kid, I. Oftentimes there were people who told me that kids couldn't have, you know, shouldn't be talking, they should be seen and not heard, and that I was too loud and in school I would get, you know, ni for needs improvement and conduct because I always had a voice and I would speak out and write out about things that felt like they were wrongs, like [00:22:00] they were you know, things that I, and there were friends of mine that I had and my, my little sister that didn't have that in them, like, that couldn't, didn't have the the you know, that weren't necessarily hardwired to be the person that was going to be the challenger.

I'm hardwired to be a challenger. So I see that I was put in those situations to be able to teach me how to use my. And for me to be able to speak out against things that are, you know, to fight for the underdog. You know, my, my virtues are mercy and justice and protection. And if you look back at my life, it's like, well, that really makes sense as to as to why.

So when you ask about like, what are the tools and what are the things, it's all right whether or not you are the person. If you're the person [00:23:00] that's there going, I, I'm going to speak up about this, or whether you're the person going, this is really hard, how do I do that? And ensuring in either situation that you don't make yourself wrong for whatever path you choose and that you resource yourself along the way.

I understood. And what, as a little kid I. How to, how to how to rest as much as I understood how to play. And part of that was because of who, who was in my life, my grandparents. And they were really great at both rest and play and resilience requires both. So I think not making yourself wrong is one of the biggest things, David, with whatever path you choose.

Yeah, no, I think that's very well [00:24:00] said. And when you were with your grandparents, your mom was working and you said she got into a second relationship. Were you primarily and your sister raised by your grandparents at this point? Well, your mom was working or was it pretty balanced still in the home? No, no, no.

My mom would drop us off in the morning. My grandmother would get us ready for school. We would leave for school at around 7 45. We would walk to school or be driven to school, depending. First through fourth was far farther away, so we had to be driven. And then fourth through eighth, we could walk or fifth through eighth, excuse me.

And then with my grandparents, we would walk home from school and then be there at three 30. Be there at two 30 when school ended. My mom would come at around three 30 at the end of, of her work day, pick us up, make dinner, do our homework, all of that, put us to bed, and then start the cycle all over again.

[00:25:00] However, as a nurse, she worked every other weekend, which meant in working on the weekends, my grandparents watched us. So they, we spent a lot of time with them a lot of time. And my grandparents were active in like what I would call fraternal organizations, which were really just drinking organizations.

And so my sister and I spent a bunch of time also. In bars with people that were older than us. So, you know, you learn a lot about various conversations and what really served me well was learning as a kid how to play pool, how to play darts, how to be able to gamble, as crazy as that sounds cuz I went into law enforcement and all of those things served me really well in my career.

Yeah, no, it's a real world. So when you were, yeah. You mentioned you briefed over at your first fight, is that like just an everyday kind of school fight or was it something serious that came out? [00:26:00] You can't drop that gem and not talk. No, it was is, yeah. You know, I, well I just, you were asking like, did anything significant happen, you know, between, you know this with sandwich between this and this, and it's like, The school that I went to had only, my class had 17 kids and 18 kids in it, and my sisters had 34, and I think that was like the largest class.

So it's not like these were classes that had a hundred students in them. They were small. It was a small school. And my you know, you, because it was such so small, you, you knew everybody intimately. It's not like you were in two separate grades or you, you were all together, all, you know, for eight years.

You, you hung out together. So if you had a disagreement with somebody, it, you generally, you didn't disagree for very long because you're, It's a small group. It's, it's like being in a big family is, is really what it's like. [00:27:00] And, and so yes, there's people you get along with more than others, but you, you certainly aren't going to not talk to this person for forever and ever cuz you're stuck with them for eight years.

And so in seventh grade there was a a, there was somebody in the school and remember I said my, where I lived was in a neighborhood 15 minutes away and it was in a middle class neighborhood. The area that I went to school with was not a middle class neighborhood. It was a lower socioeconomic area.

And it was an area where like, I literally could hear sirens all the time. And I would step out my grandparents' house and it would be like, Hmm, who's having a knife knife fight down the corner? Hmm. Who's whatever. And it was a very chaotic neighborhood. And so that's where I went to school. And so there were, there were gangs and there were all sorts of, of Things going on in the neighborhood, prostitution, gambling, [00:28:00] you know, drugs, you name it.

And so one of the kids that was in, in the school, I said something cuz remember I was a mouthy kid and I spoke up and stuff that I didn't like I said. And and she was tough, you know, I mean, I came, I, I was not, you know, I, I grew up in the Cushier neighborhood, not the wealthy neighborhood, but the Cushier neighborhood.

And even those, those kids couldn't talk to me. It was a, a safer neighborhood. Truly not her, you know, where she was, the likelihood of her, you know, getting jumped on the way home from school was more likely. And so I said something and I said something to her and we were walking home from school and and she just slapped me and she slapped me in the way that was like, With other kids around.

That was very it hurt [00:29:00] worse to my ego than the beatings that I took at home because it was in front of all my friends. And school for me was a safe haven. So the reason why it was a big deal was not because of the slap, but it was because, alright, Lisa, there's no place in the world that's safe.

Home's not safe. School's not safe. People aren't safe. The world's not safe. Nobody really cares about the vulnerable you, the soft you, the quiet you, you better learn how to find some armor, toughen up and figure out how to stay alive. And so David, that's not a, that didn't that. That's probably when I picked up a great deal of armor and masks.

And that's the reason why that was a [00:30:00] significant moment. Because it's a moment where a greater part of the world got pushed away and it was like, I'm going to get mine and if you're going to hurt me, don't even think about it because I'll hurt you first. And and if it comes down to you or me, I'm going to survive and I'll absolutely take you out.

And so that was a big piece for me where it was like I'm not where there was some sort of switch there for me. Yeah, no, I can see that now when it comes to safety and there's people listening all over the world, different cultures. Mm-hmm. Different nations. Yeah. But they connect with the lack of safety.

As we move forward, I'm sure you're going to talk about how you found your safety, but before we move forward, is there anything between your birth and high school [00:31:00] that we need to cover like this that was significant cuz that definitely was a deep moment. And even though it can seem light to someone, to you, that was a huge like light switch.

And whether those a good or bad light, it was, it was a defining moment. So yeah. When that happened, did it translate into your home life as well? Like, did you become nicer, meaner to your parents, to your parent and your grandparents and your sister? Did it not change at home? What happened there? What I would say change changed or didn't change?

Like cuz like my grandparents, when they asked me that day, I remember them asking like, how was school? And I was like, good. And so I. Much like if I called the police at night and I would say to my grandparents and they'd say, how was last, you know, how was yesterday? I would say, good. And so I learned how to lie and how to people please, and how to give people exactly what they wanted to hear [00:32:00] and to do that in a way that would have them to not upset the apple cart, which, you know, didn't necessarily work so well for me.

You know, I had to figure out that. And yet at the same time there was an element where, like I said, I, I, I wouldn't wanna speak my truth and kept my voice quiet. And yet there were other ways in which in which I, I spoke up and, and so, you know, that was a, it was pivotal and I don't know that it changed at home other than.

I just got deeper down the rabbit hole into people don't really wanna hear the truth. What they wanna hear is what they wanna hear, the thing that makes them happy. So you learn, okay, you learn to appease people and kind of be a little chameleon. Yeah. Yeah. I could be a [00:33:00] chameleon in any situation, and in some ways that's served me well and in other ways it's been incredibly detrimental.

Yeah. Short-term it was great. Long-term, not so much. Right, right. Exactly. That's exactly, that's exactly right. Yeah. And, and, you know, you ask about anything up until high school, and the only thing that I can say, there's, there's like one, you know, just an example of, there was a, I remember there was a guy in high school who liked me and I was very clear about in, in, in many ways I was clear about who I was.

And so and I wanted to fit in, but at the same time, I also understood how to speak up for things. And so I remember I went to this you know, everybody was going to, to an after party, after a football game. They would go to a pizza place and then they would go to an after party and then there would be drinking.

And I was like, I knew very, very, very clearly for me that drinking and driving were a no. Like they just were, they [00:34:00] just were a no. I wasn't going to put myself into a situation of me getting killed. I had seen my grand, my my uncle with alcoholism. I had seen other family members. And when I was in just, just a, a lot with people growing up where I was like, this is a big no for me.

And so I remember, you know, going out with this guy and we, it was like a friend that drove us cuz I didn't have my license until I was 21 and he didn't have a license and went with a bunch of people and, and I said, how are we getting home? And he's like, you know him? And I'm like, him, no way. He's like, he's had like a six pack of beer.

There is no way I'm getting in a car with him. And he's like, well, how are you going to get home? I go, I guess you'll have to call your dad. And he was like, I can't call my dad. I'm like, I don't know what to say. Then I said, but I'm not getting in that car. Like, I'm really, really clear. And everybody was like, why not?

Like, you know, this is what everybody does. And I'm like, yeah, [00:35:00] but I'm not everybody. And so for me, I understood, like I've seen way, way too many people with with drinking and drugs that at this point in my life, at the age of 16, that I'm just like, I'm, I'm, that's the one area where I draw the line in and being cool and being dead.

Nope. Not going to do it. And so, you know, I know there's a lot of people who wouldn't have done that. And I look back at that and I understand, you know, the courage that it took for me to do that. And I'm still to this day, proud of that decision of not getting in that car. And then his dad came, he called his dad at the payphone outside.

His dad came, his dad was pissed. His dad was so mad. But

I'm still here today. So where does your life go after high school? What, where does that look like? Because you know, I got, like I said, I want to keep this story [00:36:00] moving, but I want to make sure there's a lot of listeners who can relate and I can't imagine by your father not being there, both your mom and dad having marriages with, you know, you said repeated failures.

I can't imagine that set you up for success with relationships. So I want to hear how that happened and then how you found that stability and peace and safety. Oh, that's, you're so spot on with that one. So you know, I was a bit of a train wreck with relationships you know, and nothing against your character, it's just math.

No. Two plus two is four. If someone has these, these hits against them, it would be the anomaly not to have that kind of life. Absolutely. Absolutely. And so co college was after high school. I didn't wanna go to college. I wasn't like one of those people who was like, yes, I'm going to go to college. However, when I found out that the option was to go to college or get a [00:37:00] job, it was, okay, I'm going to go to college.

Because the idea of going and getting a job was less appealing to me. And I was really, really good in school. And I can't say that I applied myself fully. I was good and I applied myself to the degree of which I needed to, but I was smart. And if I would've applied myself more I would've taken harder classes.

But I didn't, instead of taking advanced courses in high school, I took whatever the, the average was and then I would just get the easy A and, and it wasn't that I had to study a whole lot, it just that I'm unfortunate that, that God blessed me with smarts. And so it came easy. And so college would then make sense that it would.

Be something to do to become easy. And I got asked out a bunch, and I can't say that I was the greatest person to be in a relationship with. [00:38:00] I had a long-term relationship in college, and I, I can say that, you know, I was, we, we were, we were a, a couple to watch and, you know, at the, at the end, at, you know, at the end of the relationship when he was ready to settle down and ask my parents to, if he could marry me.

And I don't, I didn't, I didn't find this out until years later. And, and they said yes, and I broke up with him yet again and broke his heart yet again. He, you know, just couldn't go through with it. And, you know, I, I can't say I was girlfriend of the year, so I was still trying to figure out who I was.

And you know, I, like I said, I was very clear that I didn't wanna be a statistic and I, I didn't understand relationships and that's because I didn't understand me. You know, I [00:39:00] can look back now and say, you can't be in a healthy relationship with, with another person unless you're in a healthy relationship with you.

And I didn't like myself enough for me to be able to like anyone else. And so I dated a lot. I dated an awful lot. And several years ago I spent time actually going back and messaging the majority of the people, the people that I could remember in relationships or that I had longer relationships and messaging them and reaching out and apologizing truly because you know, just to, to be on the path of, of forgiveness.

For myself and, and to, to say, Hey, I didn't have enough tools in my toolbox to be really great in relationship with you. And this is, I'm sorry. I'm really sorry. And it's very interesting what came of that experience in [00:40:00] that so many of the men came back and said, I didn't have tools in my toolbox either, and I wasn't so great either, and here's what it is I've been doing in my life since then.

And so some of them we reconnected and I have to this day, I have friendships with, which is very interesting because, you know, they, they came into my life for a, you know, a reason and a season. And, and yet, you know, the ability to take that wholeness later in life and.

Be honest about the journey that has been beautiful. Excellent. Now a lot of women and men get in abusive relationships physically and emotionally, gaslighting, narcissism. Mm-hmm. And they, especially young children, they watch this dysfunction happened and then even though they hate it, they're drawn to it [00:41:00] cuz it's what they know.

Did you find yourself gravitating towards abusive men in relationships? Or were you the polar opposite, like you became the abuser because you didn't want to be ever abused? Yeah, that's a really great question. And what I'll say about that is I had a very. That's very such a, that's such an interesting, oh, David, that's a really good, like, I, like I have a, there's, when you say your brain's going in five different directions, like with that, you have me going in five different directions because I you're, you're, you're a thousand percent, you know, you're, you're so spot on, which is, you know, then, then if you don't see it, you know, you're going to gravitate towards that which you're familiar with.

That's that which you, you, you know. And [00:42:00] I can't say that that was the case for me. I was actually very much attracted to strong men because I have such a strong personality. And so the idea of being, when somebody who was. Who was, you know, weak was not appealing. And at the same time, what I was, is a master manipulator.

Meaning like, I could get you to do something and getting you to do something was, was easy. Was just easy, you know, for, for, for, for me to do. And it wasn't done maliciously, and it wasn't done consciously. It wasn't like I said, oh geez, I'm going to go out with Bob and get Bob to do X. That's not it at all.

It's just that it wasn't a healthy experience that I had with relationships. So I didn't, I wasn't really [00:43:00] conscious of it to, to, and it was like in my family where it would be like the big joke would be like there, who's the new guy that's coming around? And so

I'll say like, one of the reasons why I married my husband is because he's one of the first guys that. Had a stronger personality than me, you know, who could really, really, really push back and could really push back and be like, oh, no, no, no, no, we're not doing that. Like, you know, oh no. And I was like, oh, really?

So it was, it was, it was, it was wonderful. And I always say, you know, in given a situation, I don't, my defenses are so down around my husband, because I understand that I was always the one that had to be on edge to take care of things. That if you are in a, if you are in a you know, in a restaurant and you're watching the [00:44:00] door and you're watching the see, like who's going to come in?

And, and if you're the one that's going to have to pull out your gun and you're going to have to take care of stuff, if a robbery goes down, well, my husband, I don't ever have to worry about that. I know that if there's like only one person standing, it will always be him. If there was only ever one person standing, he's never going to be taken out.

And so that level of, you know, just the defenses, defenses going down, I didn't have that in relationships. I often was the strongest the, the strongest. And one of my dear friends always says like, you need to hire more testosterone in your business. He's like, you, you can't, you're, you're the one that has the most testosterone and that's not good, even though there's other men that work there.

This is not like you need, like, you need to, like, you need people around you that are, that are like, that they can match your, you know, your you know, that, that, that drive and that that masculine in you. And so for me, [00:45:00] that's not, you know, in, in, when I think about what you said about the, the, the choosing, I wanted to be somebody who had my back and who would take care of me.

And at the same time, there was no, when I played Barbies as a kid, there was no Ken in the Barbie story, cuz I always knew that I had to rely on me and I had to be the one to be able to take care of me. The difference is back then it was an unhealthy, like, I'm going to do it all. I'm going to, you know, I'm, I'm going to, I don't need anybody.

I'm going to make it happen. And so I chose relationships that were, that were strong, but I also kept people at an arm's length. So sort of weird dynamic, but I didn't [00:46:00] pick the people who were abusive. I'd be more likely to take them out. Okay. And now along those lines, so you had the young woman who saw an absent father.

Woman needs to take care of herself. And now it sounds like you have a healthy marriage and how you're not better than him. He's not better than you. You're equal, but not the same. There's different roles, right? You see a balance for the listeners who are connecting with you, like, yes, I get it. I, I, I got to do this myself.

I got to take care of myself. Describe the proper view of, let's say, marriage that you now get to enjoy, that they should be looking for. That is real. It's not a fantasy, you know, there is a healthy model. What is that healthy model that you found? Well, I, that's, that's great. I, you know, I, I had a list of 54 [00:47:00] things I wanted in man, and those 54 things I was really clear about.

I wanted somebody who was a. Healthy and mind, body and spirit. I wanted somebody who, who ate well, who understood how to cook well. I wanted somebody who knew what f you know, how to buy flowers every single week. For me, I, I knew wanted somebody who took care of their family and their family was important.

Who put God first in their life, who had these 54 things that were important to me? I still have the list and, and so even when I was. Dating my husband. I was like, I think he only has 52. He doesn't have 54. I think I have to break up with him like, I was so clear, like 54 is what I deserve. Not 52, not 53, not close.

This is what I deserve. This is what is, because I had done so many things to work on me [00:48:00] now when I made that list. And was I as evolved as I am today, 20 some years later? No, I, I was, I definitely was not. However, I was on my journey where I had done so much work on me that getting to the point where I understood that in order for me to ask for those things, I had to be those things and be worthy of those things.

And not worthy in the sense that we're all worthy because we're God's children, but worthy in the sense of invested in me. That, that the.

Commitment that I have to, being the best version that I can be for someone means that I have the expectation that they're going to show up in the same manner. Being able to see that light within me. So [00:49:00] it was a responsibility that was dual on my part and, and, and then of course on, on, on theirs to show up in that way.

And so all of those things had to come before you know, the list and before the person. And that's a great top, oh, go ahead. I'm sorry. There's a delay on, go ahead. I apologize. It's perfect. No, I was just going to say, you mentioned work you did on yourself to prepare. You know, we can't give what we don't have.

I can't give you money. If I don't have money, I can't give you love if I don't have love. So what work did you do for yourself to prepare for your husband and life?

Yeah, so I didn't do, so the one thing that I'll I'll be frank about is that I was a bridger, you know, a relationship bridger. And what I mean by that is like I [00:50:00] would go from one relationship to another. I'd break up with somebody, I'd date someone else. Sometimes I would be at the same time where I would be like, okay, we'd both be dating at the same, you know, okay, I'm dating this one and this one and I don't want this one anymore.

And so, and simultaneously I was doing my work. So in each relationship I was getting better and better. And what does that work look like? One. Prayer time, you know, prayer time and communication. I've always see had what I call, you know, a personal relationship with God, where it's conversation. It's not, it's not saying wrote memorized prayers, but it's actually like, here's where I'm at.

Like, and here's what it is I need, and hey, I need some help. And hey, I think I'm failing over here. Hey, you know, let's, I wanna be honest, you know, that I, I don't think that this is going to work out whatever the, this is, you know, on my job or whatever. And so there was a, a communication. The, the other thing is I would go on retreats.[00:51:00] 

So my church would offer retreats and I would go, I always believed in retreats, like, not even just at my church, but, but I remember the first time I went on a silent retreat. It's actually pretty funny, David. Cause I didn't know I was on one and I signed up for one. I was working in law enforcement and I get there and I thought, these people are so unfriendly.

I've said hello to like three people and nobody said anything. And I went to bed at night and next morning I said, good morning. If someone, and the lady whispers to me and she goes, it's a silent retreat. And I was like, what? And then I thought, oh God, you're so funny. You put the, this printing at the bottom and I.

Probably made it so that I so small and I didn't see it cuz you knew I needed this, but I would never have gone on it if I would've known it was a silent retreat. So so I would do that, you know, for myself. And even today, you know, I will go away to an Airbnb and say to my husband, I'm going away for the weekend.

Like, I understand that I need this for me, for me to be in quiet time and prayer. [00:52:00] I take God walks and I just take a walk and say, all right, what, what do you want me to see? What do you want me to hear? And so working on me and I read books, I had mentors and guides. And even today I have a spiritual mentor that I, that I pay to talk to every week, specifically about my faith walk and about my connection.

And some people go, oh, you shouldn't have to pay for that. I'm like, what are you talking about? Like, you'd pay for all the other things, but somehow, like God's supposed to be completely free just because, okay, maybe you can believe that, but for me, that doesn't work. Like I believe some people for their connection, that that's, that's their, their gifts and I wanna be more in that.

And so, so it's important to me. I invest in the things that are important and, and, and so, so that, you know, all of those elements for me [00:53:00] allowed me to prepare myself for, to be the person that I knew at the time. I wasn't. And that's why I say like, I was doing this simultaneously when I was bridging relationships.

I can't say that like I was, as I said, you know, I wasn't necessarily girlfriend of the year. I wasn't bad. And if you were to go back and ask those guys, they would say, you know, I could tell you one of 'em said like, it was the best relationship I ever had. And so it, it's not that, it's just, if you understand the gold standard and you understand where you're operating, just because you're better than 90% of the population doesn't mean that that's necessarily excellence.

And so that, that's why I say like, it's, it's continually getting better and better and better and better in order to be able to have the relationship that I have today, which is quite incredible. [00:54:00] And it's also because of all the work that it took me to get right here, right now. Yeah. And so let's try to tie this all together and bring us up to today.

So you are in college, you're dating. Two big questions I have in my mind. You go from learning and knowing you need to grow, and now you just mentioned some ways that you did grow, but in between the gap. And we're always going to be growing till the day God takes us home. When did you come to know God and when did you meet your husband?

Those are great questions. When did I come to know God? I don't, I can't tell you a time when I didn't feel I didn't know God. And do I feel like each day [00:55:00] I get to learn more about him? Yeah, a absolutely. And what I've learned is that you can't say that a relationship in your life is important and not invest time in it.

And so I invest time in my relationship with God every single day. It's not a once in a while. It's every single day, and it's almost every single moment, like right here in our conversation, you know, there's this, this conversation going on back here. All right. What, what's important for me to, to say, not important for me to say, because there's something here for us to say, but just give me whatever words that you want out in the world from the life you've given me.

So when I was six, the Holy Spirit showed up in a vision in my bedroom when I was really angry, and that's, you know, I. There were times when I went away, God was always there. I can look back and see all the angels that were sent in my [00:56:00] life, but there was a part where I was really angry. My grandfather died.

I was in after college and I was very, very angry. And I thought, you're going to take away the only positive male role model. I'm done with you. And so I stopped going to church. I wasn't interested in God, I wasn't interested in anything with God. I can look back and still see, you know, the times when, when he was there.

And the deeper connection for me happened after nine 11. I was in federal law enforcement. I was stationed in New York. I lost my mentor. It was a really dark time. Signed up for a retreat

and I had signed up for the retreat ahead of time, and it [00:57:00] I knew that if I didn't get to a place of forgiveness, that I'd be a really angry person. And that sparked the reconnection for me going to the retreat. The reconnection,

the retreat happened prior to Li to nine 11. So the, it didn't, it wasn't like nine 11 happened and I went on the retreat. The retreat happened and post nine 11, what happened is because of that retreat, I was able to have a. I was able to double down on my connection with God is the best way that I can say.

And I met my husband in federal law enforcement. And so [00:58:00] nine 11 was a part of that because after nine 11 we were scheduled pre

course together for supervisors to teach at the academy and a train the trainer course. And after nine 11 we were partnered up with sister classes and he had one, I had the other, and you're not allowed to. Associate with students. And so we would teach the courses and then after we would teach, we would go out to dinner together.

And we did that for two weeks. That's the, that's the assignment. And you know, I just, my husband and I, you know, had great conversations and he challenged me and I pushed every button. And after that we, we dated and that [00:59:00] was 22, I guess 22 years ago. Excellent. And so we're going a lot of places and deep places, and I want to make sure we don't miss your general story, but then those stopping points along the way to help people.

And you've circled and we've discussed forgiveness and that's such an important topic and it really is key. And it's not like there's people who don't want to forgive. They just don't know how to let go. What did you learn about forgiveness and how do you just have the release it to God and have peace again?

Yeah, so that's a really great, that's it's, it's the foundation of my work, my leadership work. And I say that because if you go into an organization and people are disagreeing about something from years ago and there can't be forgiveness, [01:00:00] or if you are in a family relationship and there can't be forgiveness, then you're right.

There's this carrying something around that's just not yours. And so what I look at forgiveness is forgiveness is the one thing that can change the past, the present, and the future.

It's, it simultaneously does all, and yet you'll hear people say, Time heals all wounds. Time does not heal all wounds. Forgiveness, however, allows you to change how you see that in the past, in the moment and in tomorrow. And so what did I do? Well, I understood that for me it was too big to bear and so it wasn't mine.

So I took, you know, I, I [01:01:00] took the, the things with nine 11

to God and I laid my burdens down and said, I can't. This is too heavy. A carries can't be mine. It's got to be yours. And I ask for that a lot. On a practical level, there's something that I use in my conferences that came from Dr. Sean Deron, which is a tool called Accepting the Apology you may never receive.

And so you actually have a partner and they give you an apology from somebody because of some way that somebody has wronged you. And then you listen to the apology and physiologically speaking. And emotionally the body doesn't know the difference between whether it was the person or they, they just, it just hears the apology.

And so for me, that's a tool that I've used many, many, many, many, many times. [01:02:00] And the other part is forgiveness. Doesn't for me mean that the act was deserving or it was, it was.

Even fair. It just means that it happened. And I have a choice. So there's a beautiful prayer, Theono prayer, which David, you've probably heard and you know, it's, it's, it's, I love you. I'm sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. And the Hawaiian community says that prayer over and over again, bringing somebody back into the fold.

And there's a, a Dr. Lou hen Hugh. Len Hugh, who, you know, used that to cure a hundred percent of the patients in a psychiatric hospital years ago by never seeing a [01:03:00] patient just simply saying those words, I love you. I'm sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. Over and over again, not even physically to the patient, but just saying them, looking at the file and so, you know, our words and our thoughts and our beliefs have such power.

So I going back to my uncle and all of the experiences that I've had, if I didn't learn how to forgive and have a bit of tenderness and compassion to people's stories and where they've been, then once again, I feel like that would have gotten in the way of me being able to do the work I'm called to do today.

So anything that impedes my define divine mission, it's just something that I don't, I don't hold onto. And those are tools that I use to be able to let go. Awesome. And we'll [01:04:00] put a link if you have one on your website, that prayer, or if you have a source that you find is reliable, we'll put a link in our show notes.

So as the listener, you can check out what Lisa Maria is explaining in this one prayer and explore the other concepts too. So between your birth and today in your story, I know there's a lot of events and we didn't even touch on the professional aspect of your life, right? Other than you in federal law enforcement, you met your husband.

So let's wrap up this section of your life so we don't skip anything important that we've missed. That brings us here to this moment today, the weekend before Memorial Day.

I mean, David, I mentioned the, you know, the 13 and being in the hospital with the collapsed sls. But I've had a bunch of, of, you know, near death [01:05:00] experiences where, you know, I was in car accidents and the other person was taken out with the jaws of life and I almost didn't get my job. And in federal law enforcement and that experience of, wow, you know, I managed to walk away from, you know, from this.

And then years ago I was getting ready after my first book had published, I was at the top. I mean, it was truly, you know, the top of my business. 2008, I had received an award from the National Association of Female Executives as a rising star. I, they're a Woman of Excellence award. They only give five a year.

I had gotten just all sorts of accolades accolades from the White House and it wasn't because I was working in the government anymore, it was cuz of my, my service. [01:06:00] And had a car accident and everything stopped and all my clients and everything stopped. And I look at those moments and they're like, moments of redirect. Like, go here, not there, go here, not there. And managed to walk away. And I look at experiences like that and go, they're just teachers. They're just teachers to teach me more about forgiveness, to teach me more about compassion, to teach me more about what's mine to do, and focus on that and don't get distracted in any other thing.

What's, what's really most important

you ask about, you know, the, the, the, that, that piece of the journey. And I look at those car accidents. I look at the, the, the, you know, the, the life experiences. I, I had, you know, a, a [01:07:00] stepbrother that was killed and, and decapitated when I was in my early twenties. And, and that sense of loss. So, so much, so much in terms of, of resilience and Overcoming hard and following the bread breadcrumbs to go. Okay. What did that teach you? Life is precious.

It's interesting you say this and I, you know, I mean, how many times do you sit down? Maybe you do it a lot, but how many times, you know, have I sat down and looked at all of the life experiences, you know, and just so many of them. When I was 22, I made the decision to date a man that was 40. And why is that a big deal?

Because it's [01:08:00] 18 years older. He's 18 years older and truly, you know, just, just an amazing, amazing, amazing man. And we're still friends today. L love him. And It was a moment where my family was so concerned for my soul and they, you know, had a priest come and intercede and they threw the keys at my mom and moved out of their house and told them, F you, I'm going to do what I want.

And I look at those experiences and go, once again, speaking your truth. Resilience, whereas your light inside, stay the course. What's yours to do? Who are you? What do you want? Why does it matter? And I just replay that back over and over and over again in every single scene as you are having me flash through all of this [01:09:00] in my life.

David,

easy, right? Easy, no pressure. So now again, from the outside, looking back, obviously absent father, you dated a guy 18 years older is what people call daddy issues. I mean, how did you wake up from that and identify it? Because obviously there's people go from relationship like that to relationship like that.

So how did you break that cycle? When did it dawn on you like, oh, I'm just trying to compensate for not having a father?

When did I, I, I, like I said, I, I, I, there wasn't the aha moment, you know, it's not like there was this moment where it was like he, oh my gosh, you know, here it is. It was really a [01:10:00] commitment to growth and evolution. It was a commitment to having people in my life. If I could like, give a piece of advice to myself, you know, that that would be, you know, as, as a reminder that for that anybody could use it. It's always have advisors around you that don't be the smartest person in your circle of friends. And so that was really important to me. So there were people who I kept around in my life who challenged me to be better, who wanted me to be better.

And for me, that's the reason why I was always learning. So when you ask me like, what was the thing, you know, that I did to, did I recognize it? No. I didn't have this thing that said, oh, Lisa, you have daddy [01:11:00] issues. It was. How do I be better? How do I be better? And as I became better relationships that I had with people became better, my C three areas, connection to self first connection, connection to God, first, connection to self second, and connection to others.

And the more I deepened my relationship with God, the greater my relationship with myself became, and the greater the relationship with myself became, the greater my relationship with others became. And that was both in my personal life and in my professional life. And so I think that a lot of times people look externally and I knew that for me, I had to spend time on me to really understand who I was, what I wanted, and why it mattered before I could be any good for anyone else.

And then where did this journey take you today? Like what? Is your focus of your business, how did you get there in the transition from [01:12:00] federal law enforcement? So when, when I met my husband, I said, I don't want a serious relationship. And he said, good. I don't want one either. And so that was, you know, that worked out.

We were married. That worked out well. So yeah, then we were, we were married like, you know, two, two plus years later. And I was, we'd never lived in the same state and I worked in the New York area and he, he worked in DC and then I took a job teaching at the Federal Law Enforcement Training center in Georgia, and he took one in California running the center out there.

And then I took one at the Federal Law Enforcement [01:13:00] Training Center in Georgia. No, in, no, I, the one in Dallas, Texas, the Supervisory Leadership Center in Dallas, Texas. So we really weren't close, if you know, the United States, if you understand that we weren't like close geographically. And friends of mine said, you know, usually people who get married, they're going to live in the same place.

And I really hadn't given it a whole lot of thought. You know, I was very independent. My husband was very independent. You have two independent people who do their own things. And so it, it became this, well, what would I do if I left? Because I loved law enforcement and it made such sense with all of the domestic violence that, you know, once again, my, my commitment to mercy and justice and protection.

So law enforcement was a really good fit for me. Making the decision to quit was because of marriage. I couldn't figure out how, with my [01:14:00] values, I would be a great wife and be available with a 24 7 career marrying somebody with a 24 7 career. It just didn't, I couldn't, I couldn't compute. I just, I didn't, it, the math didn't add up.

You know, you mentioned earlier like two plus two just equals four. Like, you just, how do people do that? And so they, they decide that, and most people will go, well, I'm, I'm climbing the career. You know, I was you know, climbing the career ladder. And so why would I leave? You know, he was climbing the career ladder.

Why would he leave? We're both making over six figures, so why would we leave? And yet, I believe so much going back to living with your values, understanding who you are, what you want, and why it matters. And so I left and 18 years ago, 18 and a half years ago, I opened my leadership evolution [01:15:00] company and I went into companies and I taught them leadership.

The same leadership that I taught at the Federal Law Enforcement Training Center and the Leadership Development Center because leadership is, leadership is leadership. And then it became instead of the larger companies like the the, the Banco Santander's and the State Farms and larger entities, then it became small business owners.

And that was because of the Chamber of Commerce. They asked, and then it became a lot of speaking, and then those keynotes turned into conferences that I've had for 17 years now, and then those turned into coaching and programs and retreats. And getaways now at my farm in Kentucky. And so this leadership evolution business in and itself evolved over the last 18 years.

Not because I said, oh, geez, I'm going to do this rather because I listened. This is who I am, this is what I [01:16:00] want, this is why it matters. The what I want was never like, I'm going to have a farm or I'm going to, that's not the what I want. It's the, it's the, I wanna be able to fully use my, my gifts, my abilities, my talents and experiences to be a force for good on the planet.

Much like when I looked at your website and saw your mission and saw how you defined it, I went, okay, I, I get it. Like I, I, David and I, I, I get like, this is, it's the, it's the, the larger, more holistic. What do you want? And, and most people don't give themselves the ability to, to look at life from that lens because they're so caught up in what someone tells them they have to do or have to be or have to say.

And so, so much of my life has been about who am I? What do I want? Why does it matter? What's my mission? What's my values? What's my vision? How do I make [01:17:00] decisions from th that lens? And only from that lens, so that I live out my divine mission, the, the, the reason why I'm here on the planet. And if it doesn't make sense to anybody else, it doesn't matter.

Made no sense to my parents to leave my job. Made no sense to a lot of people that, for me to do what I do today makes no sense for people to, you mentioned it earlier, I should have been a statistic, not a success. Doesn't make sense. And yet, here I am. Doing what God's asked me to do. Yeah. And it's in be a lonely place too, correct?

Like on your journey. Most people aren't pursuing what I'd feel, and I believe what you'd feel is our main goal is to glorify God. And our main goal is to pursue him. And when we're on that journey, people don't understand. They think we're the freak, we're the one that's lost, and a lot of times it's them.

So [01:18:00] then we're alone and we're questioning ourselves. Would you agree with that or disagree? All my lifelong, yes. So all my life, yeah. I mean, you know, I've, I've felt most of my life that I'm, you know, odd woman out and at the same time, that's where I mentioned earlier, the Dublin down on God and the leaning in a little bit greater and not being so attached to.

Yep. It's got to look this way because it is lonely and it's easy. It's so easy for me to get distracted. You know, social media, oh, look at what that one's doing. Look at that one's getting, look what that one's involved in. It's like, this is your course, Lisa. You are really clear. This is your course. This is where you are going, and this is the work that you are destined to do.

And when someone shows up at a retreat and they have the [01:19:00] breakthrough that they've been waiting for for 10 years, and it happened in two days because you allowed God to move through you. This is your, it doesn't matter what everybody else is doing, but I got to tell you, sometimes that feels really, really lonely.

So yes, yes, yes and yes. All right, well, where is Lisa Marie today? And where are you heading next? How can we help you get there? And just. Maybe if the listeners want to connect with you, we'll get to that where they can, how they can, what the best way is. But where are you specifically today and where are you heading?

Well, today I'm on a farm in Eastern Kentucky in the Bluegrass region. Like as a literal, you know, here's where I'm at and I still have, I know my company, upside Thinking is a leadership evolution company. And where I'm at is me ensuring that I stay the course to be [01:20:00] 1% better every day, so that I'm the best version of me and I get to shine my light as brightly as possible and allow the people that are I'm called to work with and support and serve to have their lives be that much easier by bringing this blend of.

Spirituality and business acumen. It's the both, and how do you bring, how do you tap into the divine operating system? How do you bring God into your everyday life, into business? That's the journey that I'm on and I'm, I'm excited about what's to come because I've been far more vocal about this over the last year, and what I'm finding is that people who, that makes them really wildly uncomfortable, they're going away and people who are really curious about this and have wanted to do that [01:21:00] are leaning in.

I firmly believe that you can make lots and lots and lots of money and have opportunities show up in ways that do not. They, they def, they defy common sense when God is a part of it. And when there is a purity of that light, like it is, it's, it's, it's miraculous. And, and that's that's the journey I'm on.

Beautiful. Beautiful. Now, we talked about, when we started this, we said, if the listeners hang through, they're going to hear how the world needs you. And then we talked about fine and safety, establishing healthy relationships, and that walking with God for the people who have been ingrained that they're worthless, they don't have value, you know, they're, they're useless, they're unloving, unloved, you know, the people believe these, they were programmed with lies of the devil.

The world really does. [01:22:00] Only need God, but he has a role for us all. So the world does need us in that sense. So I agree with you completely. So for the people listening who are having a hard time believing that truth, what's your words to them?

We ask easy questions in the show. Just hearing, well, David just hearing you say that like it has my heart just, it just really, it just has me just be so tender because as you speak, that

that's one of the reasons why that bon opponent prayer is such a powerful prayer because.[01:23:00] 

I am you and you are me. And that's the journey that I've walked. And so, no, I, I figured early on that with all the things that happened to me, that God forgot about me, that there had to be something worthless about me, that all the experiences that showed up, they wouldn't have showed up. If God loved me, why did I have to be the kid that had the hand me down?

So why did I have to be the kid who had the parents that weren't together? Why did I have to be the kid who had to call the police or had to struggle to have my family put food on the table? Why? Why couldn't I be in one of those other kids?

[01:24:00] Or as a team, just the many ways in which I thought God forgot about me. And what I've learned is that all of those experiences were from my greatest good. And they were ones that

allowed me to be even stronger in order to glorify God, to see how he pulled me out of the ashes and allowed me to rise stronger, not based on my own strength, but based on his. And so when I say the world needs you and your brilliances, cuz it does, you're created in the image and likeness of God and there's a light in you that's so bright that you may not have even been able to tap into right now if you're in that place.

And yet I [01:25:00] understand that it's there because this is my story and this is me. This has been me and it still is me. And there are days when life is still really, really, really hard. I'm in the middle of sitting in a house right now that has no furniture in it because of pipe breaks. I had no heat and hot water for seven weeks.

And still I run my business. I have a tornado damage and lost part of my event center. And there are things that continue to happen that I'm just understand that it will all work out for the best. And I get that when you're on the floor and you're feeling like.

No one knows what it is that you're going through, or you have to have the courage to pick up the phone to call the police, and the amount of courage that that takes, I [01:26:00] understand that that doesn't feel like it's for your greatest good.

What I can say is that it's not about having deserved those experiences, it's understanding that the truth that I've had to come to is that God doesn't create harm, hurt people do, and God has a way to be able to make it all better.

And help you pick up the pieces. And that's been the thing that I've learned on the way. And so the world indeed does need you and your brilliance now more than ever, and that light inside you is so bright and the world needs it. And when you [01:27:00] don't shine it, the world misses out

and whatever it takes to be 1% better than the day before, that's the journey I'm on. And that's the journey I'd challenge you to be on 1%. What's one thing you can do?

Thank you. That's what I got, David. Yeah, no, thank you so much, Lisa Marie, for being with us today. And if someone wants to get ahold of you, What's the best way for them to reach out to you to continue the conversation, ask questions, just kind of move forward in their life, and whether they just wanna read more of your materials online or get you for coaching or a, a retreat, where do they go?

My website is upside [01:28:00] thinking.com, U P S I D E and the word thinking, t h i N K I N g upside thinking.com. And there's even a spot there to sign up to have a conversation with me. There's a calendar link there. I'm often on Facebook, but feel free to reach out. Excellent. And I know I've asked this before, but before we wrap up the show, is there anything that we missed in your journey that you're like, Dave, we need to talk about this, or, I feel led to talk about this.

Or do you have any closing thoughts you wanna leave with our listeners?

No. The, the only thing that comes up, David, is that there's seven areas of wellbeing that I examine, and so I didn't mention it. And you've asked about practical tools and tips, and so there's seven areas of wellbeing that I review in that 1% journey. And so it's physical, emotional, [01:29:00] intellectual, spiritual, financial, relational and in work.

And so I ask myself, what is it? That's my commitment physically, what's my commitment mentally? What's my commitment intellectually, what's my commitment spiritually, financially, relationally? And as I'm asking myself this, that's where the 1% better comes in. It's like, what am I doing to be better in these areas?

Every single day in, in order to honor the godlike that's in me in order to honor my divine mission and purpose. And so the practical way is to be able to look at through that lens.

Excellent. I appreciate you so much, Lisa Marie. It's been, it's been enjoyable. It's been, you know, touching my heart. It's been [01:30:00] educational and I keep smiling at awkward places because the things you're saying, I definitely agree with you. Like on my website, even though it's not public, the whole website, the number one goal is to glorify God and help people grow just like this podcast.

And it's broken down into like those same categories, financial, mental, spiritual, relational, you know? So it's just I definitely think we, I. We're on the same page. And for our listeners, if you haven't come to a relationship with God, if you're not sure if he's real, you know, spend time with God like Lisa Marie's talking about, because you can pick up the Bible and read it, and sometimes it doesn't make sense.

But like Lisa Marie said, there's mentors and there's reverends and pastors and people you can go to to help you understand the Bible. Or even just a friend [01:31:00] who lives the walk doesn't just say they believe in God, but they live it. You can reach out to Lisa Marie or myself. Start, ring your Bible by Christ.

Say, John, where would you recommend reading the Bible to start? If someone's not sure if they believe or not?

For me? Yeah. No, I'm just saying like, I, I love ic, God's love outta John. Proverbs. Proverbs is me. Wisdom. Wisdom, everyday wisdom. Right. Yeah. Yeah. So I think, yeah, I think John's great proverbs for me is my go-to every morning. Yeah. Proverb, bode keeps the devil away, right? So, yeah. So listen, the Bible's real every answer, every question's in there.

God only wants us to have joy in peace if there's anything else that happens. He didn't cause it, he allowed it. And like Lisa Marie's whole testimony, her whole story just shows you that even the good, the bad, the ugly, everything that [01:32:00] happens, there's a purpose in it. And like she talked about, just kind of following the Holy Spirit and not having a such a set plan doesn't mean things will be easy, but it does mean things will turn out perfect.

So, Lisa Marie, thank you so much for being here today. You said that beautifully doesn't mean it doesn't mean that it even makes sense, but it'll turn out perfect. Just understand that that's exactly it. Amen. Thank you. Thank you so much for having me. Oh, thanks for being here. And ladies and gentlemen, like our slogan says, don't just listen to great content, but do it.

Repeat it each day. Like Lisa Marie says, have a great life in this world, but most importantly, be thinking ahead to attorney to come. So I'm David Pasqualone. This was Lisa Marie on the Remarkable People Podcast. Lisa Marie, thank you again for being here, ladies and gentlemen, Rachel, thank you. Thank you so much, Steven.

Oh yeah, no problem. Ladies and gentlemen, reach out to Lisa Marie, let us know how this [01:33:00] episode's helped you and if we can help you some more. And we'll see you in the next episode. Ciao.